My Grain
ποΈ 25
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οΈ Mar 12 2021
My trademark for extremely small grains of rice was rejected
Not sure why. I call it "Minute Rice" and it only takes about an hour to cook.
ποΈ 19
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οΈ Jan 08 2021
What do you call a malfunctioning grain elevator?
ποΈ 6
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οΈ Jan 09 2021
Hi! What do you call a physically fit grains farmer?
ποΈ 9
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οΈ Oct 30 2020
I was gonna make a joke about grains
But it was a little corny
ποΈ 12
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οΈ Oct 21 2020
What do you call it when a grain of sand loses its trane of thought?
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Nov 05 2020
Son, take the bible with a grain of salt...
... hence, don't take it as gospel.
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Sep 25 2020
Me and a couple of friends are arguing how to get out of the grain silo.
We're all in the same oat.
ποΈ 13
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οΈ Jun 28 2020
How to grain your dragon
ποΈ 55
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οΈ Mar 09 2020
The neighbour's sheep failed to break into the grain shed.
There was no battering ram.
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Jul 23 2020
How many grains of salt are in a salt shaker.
ποΈ 12
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οΈ Apr 13 2020
I found a typo on a bag of grains
It was spelt incorrectly.
ποΈ 15
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οΈ Feb 08 2020
If you take grain to a granary, where do you take corn?
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Jul 10 2020
Going against the grain here
Chinese takeout: $15.00
Gas to get there: $1.50
Getting home to find theyβve forgotten one of your dishes...
Riceless
ποΈ 99
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οΈ Feb 28 2020
What do you call a semi driver rocking out to 80s music while carrying a load of grain?
Haulinβ Oats...
π€¦π»ββοΈπ€¦π»ββοΈπ€¦π»ββοΈ
Iβll show myself to the door.
-dad
ποΈ 26
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οΈ Dec 29 2019
I was hired to represent the hard outer layers of cereal grain in a positive light and by doing so help to increase awareness and sales.
ποΈ 2
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οΈ May 16 2020
What does the farmer say when he sees his grain has caught fire?
ποΈ 1k
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οΈ Dec 10 2017
Why does Darth Vader prefer coarse-grain pepper?
He hates it when it's high ground.
ποΈ 32
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οΈ Jan 06 2020
What do you call a whole grain thatβs zero calories but is rarely used?
ποΈ 6
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οΈ Mar 15 2020
The paper this was printed on has a purple grain
ποΈ 6
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οΈ Jul 04 2019
Every loaf of bread is a tragic reminder of what can happen to grain
if it doesn't become whiskey.
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Nov 15 2019
A bunch of grains got together to protest.
ποΈ 9
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οΈ Jun 29 2019
You guys hear about that grain farmer?
He could barley wheat for his crops to come in.
ποΈ 24
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οΈ Jun 08 2018
Did you know during the third Reich there was a project to produce energy from a certain type of grain
I'm surprised you never heard of Hitler's rice to power
ποΈ 20
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οΈ May 22 2019
What did the farmer say when his grains were harvested?
ποΈ 5
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οΈ Sep 18 2018
I build factories where grain is grinded into flour. You might think my job isn't lucrative.
But this year I made one mill.
ποΈ 24
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οΈ Oct 03 2018
If you found a tribe of women in a giant field of wheat, would it be an Amazon grain forest?
ποΈ 5
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οΈ Nov 14 2018
If your doctor tells you to go on a low sodium diet, do you take his advise with a grain of salt?
ποΈ 19
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οΈ Mar 05 2019
The price of grass fed beef is higher than grain fed beef, but you wanna know what beef is the most expensive?
Weed fed beef...
High Steaks!
ποΈ 10
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οΈ Dec 24 2018
I buddy of mine gave me some flour made from ancient grains. Now I swap small bags of it for baked goods.
I get pie with a little spelt from my friends!
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Mar 21 2019
You should always take restaurant suggestions with at least a grain of salt, just in case they don't turn out.
Makes it taste better either way!
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Jul 16 2018
Lots of people are farming wheat and other grains nowadays...
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Feb 23 2019
What was the grain truckers favorite band?
ποΈ 37
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οΈ Jan 13 2017
Where do Greek chicken farmers throw their grain?
ποΈ 29
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οΈ Jan 01 2018
What did the the grain of sand say after it made it's way out of the oyster?
ποΈ 2
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οΈ May 26 2018
What do you call an Australian that will only eat short-grain rice?
ποΈ 8
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οΈ Jul 26 2016
What do you call a person unaware of whole wheat, whole grain, sourdough and rye?
ποΈ 13
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οΈ Aug 25 2017
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Sep 23 2016
So a microbiologist walks into a feed-and-grain storeβ¦
ποΈ 15
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οΈ Nov 30 2014
Why is grain such a drama queen?
Because it does everything with a flour-ish
ποΈ 5
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οΈ Feb 24 2017
Did you hear about the guy who died in a grain silo?
He couldn't find a corner to piss in...
ποΈ 3
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οΈ Jun 07 2016
I tried to take everything with a grain of salt...
But my doctor told me to cut back on the sodium!
ποΈ 8
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οΈ Apr 28 2016
I work at a grain elevator and fertilizer plant, dad joked my wife.
Wife: How's the market today?
Me: Grain is up in rows, livestock is outstanding in the field.
ποΈ 2
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οΈ Apr 25 2014
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