They’re just going against the grain
No plains no grains
My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains
The vet had recently diagnosed him with silly yak disease.
My response?
Pick it's grain... Ask it wheats the matter... Ask it why it's all in a husk...
Turns out she meant to type "How do you feel about barley" and wasn't setting up a joke... (I use my hands to feel about barley)
I think I spend to much time on this sub :)
Well they made Bud wiser
He was going against the grain
Rye would you say that?
He brews it.
It would be corny anyway
I'm a bran ambassador.
He said not to take the lords name in grain.
He's doing a mission (I'm barley paying attention). I glance up and there's 2 cop cars trying to stop him. They get on either side of him and pinch him to a stop.
Son: Dang. The cops got me.
Me: What happened? Did they cop block you? (still chuckling to myself)
BTW, He's only 7 years old. He has no idea why I thought it was funny. My wife gave me the look of disapproval, so success was had.
Edit: I just want to let everyone know that I didn't notice my barely/barley mistake until after the hop joke below. Thanks.
He's in charge of the hops.
Nothing... They barley knew each other.
They have hops.
What tea is called tea even though its not really tea?
Barley tea
Why?
Because its barely tea
He could barley wheat for his crops to come in.
Because he had my grains
But I have barley any.
When the lady in front of me looks at me and says.
Lady: That beer look real heavy.
Me: Well ma'am, it says right here on the box that it's light beer.
When Harry Met Salad
What About Ke-Bob
Cumin to America
Weekend at Bearneaise II
Steakin I, II, & III
A Few Good Salmon
You’ve Got Kale
Shawshank Re-Dim Sum
Romancing the Scone
An Éclair to Remember
Roman Hollandaise
Glazed and Confused
Bill & Ted’s Eggcellent Adventure
The Evil Bread
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Shrimp
Fondue the Right Thing
Ribeyes Wide Shut
Mignons
Plante of the Grapes
Spider Manchu
Sushis All That
A Wok to Remember
Marsala-la Land
Apocalypse Cow
Die Chard
Die Chard with a Vinaigrette
Hogan’s Gyros
The Sand Latkes
A League of their Macaroni
Revenge of the Curds
Rush S’More
Braising Arizona
Demolition Ham
10 Things I hate About Ewe
Saladin
Oliver and Com-penne
Dirty Rotten Chanterelles
Sex and the Satay
The Truth About Cats & Hotdogs
Morella Enchanted
Provolone Together
Clear and Pheasant Danger
The Big Chili
Lémon: The Professional
Ava-Tartare
Hocous Pocous
High Fi-Deli Meat
Madagascargot
The Fifth Elementos
Muensters Inc.
There’s Something About Rosemary
I Am Ham
Quiche Lorraine Man
Barley & Me
Lentil Giants
Peggy Soufflé Got Married
Face Stroganoff
Con Gruyére
Fast Times at Porridgemont High
Bok Choys in the Hood
Papillonion
Requinoa for a Dream
Serial Cardamom
Started from the barley, now we’re beer.
Me: “Just barley.”
"How do they make Budweiser?" "Well, Budweiser is made partly from rice and uses forced carbonation, whereas most craft beer is made from barley and the carbonation comes from bottle conditioning." "No. They send him to school."
My dad and I are always on serious terms and we barley joke around. The other day we were driving into the church parking lot and he went in the wrong way, to his attention I say "dad you just entered the wrong way" to which he replied "there is no wrong way to god" I've never smiled so hard with him.
My girlfriend NEVER drinks, but she had a little bit of a stressful day this day and was kidding. We were walking into the grocery store after work.
Her: Whew, I feel like a beer!
Me: [squint and give the slightest grin]
Her: I don't feel like A beer! I feel like HAVING A beer!
Me: Well I feel like a beer. Look at all these hops. [hop a few times with feet together like an idiot]
She enjoyed my lame joke.
When I was younger my dad would always sing this jingle
"Shes got freckles on her but shes pretty." and I kind of always giggled.
fast forward like 3 more years and he sings it one day and I am blown away as I realize he was saying the entire time "Shes got freckles on her butt, shes pretty"
Also he used to close his right eye while driving and told me he closed both of them and to tell him which direction to steer. I was like 4-6 and barley knew left from right, especially under stress. I always freaked out. He had a great time with it. I can't wait to do these things to my kids.
