โ€œ Rico Premium Rice Paper โ€œ have a rice day
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheRealSandieCane
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My doctor has discovered that I'm allergic to rice.

Apparently I'm basmatic.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/adfunk101
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
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Went out and took pictures of wheat, oats, rice, and corn...

Unfortunately, they all came out pretty grainy. One of them you could barley make out.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/frudedude
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Purpledrank
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Just opened a Christmas card and rice fell out.

Must be from my Uncle Ben.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Pengu_62
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What is the happiest kind of rice?

pie-YAY!-ya

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Atwood781
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My trademark for extremely small grains of rice was rejected

Not sure why. I call it "Minute Rice" and it only takes about an hour to cook.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/maximusheadroom
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Why did the Japanese brewer take fermented rice to church ?

For Christ's sakรฉ !

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/kshawshank
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I was looking forward to eat my rice bowl.

But my Brother, like always, ate them. And now he's experiencing really bad headaches.

I guess it's because he has a history of having my-grains.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/shaggie42069
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I was telling my friend that brown rice is the same as white rice, but with a criminal record....

He thinks I'm a riceist for saying that.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What does rebellious rice always do?

Goes against the grain.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ConradFlick
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I love Basmati rice....

I could eat it Tilda cows come home.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/VERBERD
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A Mafia hit-man was arrested for killing a man in a rice field with a porcelain figurine.

The police said this is the first known case of a knick knack paddy whack

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/NeGuy1
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Have a Rice Day!
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/uncaged-bird
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
So the other day I ordered some Kung Pao chicken, but I think it came with a side of pasta instead of rice

Orzo it seems

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thebobstu
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The Mafia killed a man in a rice field because of a dispute over a small trinket

It was a knick-knack paddy whack

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/ValkornDoA
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call someone who only eats white rice?

Ricist

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jagginfiniti
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I almost made a huge mistake applying to Rice University.

I'm really a meat and potatoes kind of guy.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jdmpersson
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Selenaโ€™s New single, Rice Cream
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/AJSaporno
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Tennis player Sampras needed rice wine and sent me to buy a bottle without giving me cash...

For Pete's sake, I guess he wants me to pay for it myself!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My wife said she prefers brown rice

Thatโ€™s just riceist

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/EdBlamey
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Just got back from the supermarket - there was a guy rushing round the shop who had brought 15kg of paella rice, 5 cases of tequila, 8 sombreros and 12 piรฑatas.

I thought to myself, Hispanic buying.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/heilhanson
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My son refuses to eat rice if it in not white.

I said โ€œSon, thatโ€™s ricest!โ€

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MaryLightly33
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
All rice!
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/chiefyaj
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 29 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Iโ€™m going to start a brand of rice wine and Iโ€™ll call it for fucks.

Oh..... for fucks sake.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Briccone1979
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the fried rice say to the shrimp?

Dont wok away from me!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/midnighthunder0
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What is Spiderman's favourite brand of rice?

Uncle Ben's

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/kickypie
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 18 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What do you call a Greek philosopher who loves rice?

Arisotto

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/matt_read
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I heard that Marvel is now sponsoring Uncle Ben's rice and changing the picture to Peter Parker's uncle.

The new slogan is "With great power comes great rice possibilities."

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jurassicbond
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 17 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
During quarrantine I've really perfected how to make some heavenly rice.

I boil the hell out of it.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/enganere
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
The girl at chipotle asked if I like white or brown rice

I told her that sheโ€™s rice-ist

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/PoeJascoe
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
How do you know your Rice Crispies are stoned?

They go, "Snack, Popple, and Crap!"

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/BloodyMorgan
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 29 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
And together, we will rice
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Cryptkfire
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 10 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My girlfriend hates brown rice and only eats white rice.

Iโ€™m dating a ricist.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/in2diep
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I really like shrimp-fried rice.

Itโ€™s amazing how they can hold that big skillet in their tiny little claws.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Bullhead20
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My pastor wasnโ€™t a fan of my new Jesus Riceโ„ข

He said not to take the lords name in grain.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/spyro4now
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My son only ate the white rice and ignored the meatball and yellow lentils

I think he's ricist

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/falgony
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Every time I go to dinner with my parents, they constantly argue about the mashed potatoes, rice or french fries...

And I always tell them that I'm not choosing sides.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/OK_Compooper
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 08 2017
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Me: Mom where do I find the rice in the store?

Mom: (points) you find it rice there.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/falknorRockman
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
Chicken-fried rice
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Bombastic_Sushi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 09 2018
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I'm sure it has been done, but chicken fried rice! Found at a resort tempenaki restaurant.
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Dinosoares21
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 26 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the potato say to the rice

Sup-rice

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MineMinecrafft
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 07 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I accidentally got rice in my headphone jack

Now all my music sounds Grainy

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SHZD_786
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 07 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
My friend always sleeps with his head on a bag of rice

He said it was a type of pilau.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/jonathanharker
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 11 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I Just opened a card and a load of rice fell out the envelope

Itโ€™s was from my uncle Ben

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JoelandLouise
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
A hit-man was arrested for killing a man in a rice field with a porcelain figurine.

The police said this is the first known case of a knick knack paddy whack.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 4
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/tiny_spring
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
I donโ€™t get why minute rice advertises that itโ€™s โ€œminuteโ€.

Itโ€™s just as small as other rice.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Brainsonastick
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ︎ report
What did the fried rice say to the shrimp?

Dont wok away from me!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Crankycarrotparrot
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
๐Ÿšจ︎ report

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