A list of puns related to "Rice Jokes"
Riceless
This morning I woke up and my pillow was gone.
Today is the 13th anniversary of my father passing and this was my favorite joke that he used to tell. Enjoy.
I know it's hard to believe, but I saw it with my own two eyes.
Wife made asian food for dinner last night, Tofu/Rice/Veggies/Chicken Wontons.
Toddler is killing the wontons and we teach him how to say "wonton" so he can ask for more correctly.
As he's stuffing another piece into his mouth I ask him "hey bubba, do you like wontons?"
To which my son replies, "No..like twotons"
My son's first joke and it's a dad joke...i'm just so proud lol....
The Whistleblower's Daughter
She commented, "that's an odd amount." I told her for being a math honors student, I would think she'd recognize that 46 is an even number.
She rated my comment a 6 out of 10 on the Dad joke scale.
My husband is perusing the menu and points out that they have Battered Shrimp on the menu. He turns to me and says, "I wonder if the shrimp pressed charges". My son and I exchanged glances and facepalmed in unison.
Him: Yeah and if that doesn't work, you put butter on it
Me: Butter?? Really? I hadn't heard that one. Why butter?
Him: Because if the rice doesn't work the phone is toast
Dad: f.o.r.t. Me: now say it twice Dad: fort fort Me: now say it three more times Dad: fort fort fort Me: now what do you eat soup with? Dad: (inserts the most Asian ass accent) “RICE” No joke the moment he said that I had to post on reddit.
I was in Elementary School at the time of this joke, and it still makes me chuckle thinking back on it. My teacher had us running a couple of laps around the school's grassy field. I always had breathing problems, what I'm assuming is mild asthma although it's never been diagnosed. I ran up to the teacher after running a few minutes and told him I lost my breath. He asked something along the lines of, "Well do you want help finding it?" He made the entire class search the ground for my breath. One equally sarcastic child brought me the empty wrapper to a Rice Crispy treat. Oh how I loved that teacher.
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