The aliens returned with a butter force.
π︎ 104
π
︎ Mar 17 2021
What's it called when a woman sets up and forces her husband to go out with her friend's husband?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Feb 19 2021
What do you call identical twins that join the police force?
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
I failed a recent test on the forces of the earth.
Apparently I didnβt understand the gravity of the situation I was in
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe
but if you remove it, you get gravy.
π︎ 49
π
︎ Nov 24 2020
Torque appropriated circumstances call for -in kind- repeat applied force when concerned with most of yer dried and salted pork products and jovial responses.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Oct 19 2020
I tried to join the psychic police force
But I failed the vision test
π︎ 9
π
︎ Nov 05 2020
I believe in a cosmic force...
I am especially attracted by gravity, it keeps me grounded.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 27 2020
Did you hear that the Air Force just bought a bunch of copies of The Little Mermaid on DVD?
They must be preparing for an Ariel assault.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Nov 08 2020
May the sales force be with you.
Q: Why doesnβt Darth Vader hire storm troopers to do his marketing?
A: Because they are always missing their sales targets!
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
My friend joined a cult who believe that weβll all turn to water and be evaporated into a bigger life force...
I said... youβll be mist...
π︎ 61
π
︎ Aug 23 2020
What do you call a man who was force fed chocolate and peanut butter then chopped up?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 07 2020
Duct tape is like the Force.
It has a dark side and a light side, and it holds the universe together.
π︎ 30
π
︎ Jul 03 2020
58 years ago today, Ringo joined forces with John, Paul, and George.
Pete got sacked, but it was for the Best.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 15 2020
Whats the most important thing to be when living in Asgard with a corrupt police force?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 15 2020
Why do Air Force pilots salute differently?
Because theyβre above us.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Sep 06 2020
Obi wan and Anakin meet at a force ghost party.
Obi wan: Okay Anakin, answer this. Imagine, I am on a planet, very far away from yours. And I was out of range of all forms of communication.
Anakin: Okay...and?
Obi wan: And there was an urgent message, that you had to send me. How would you send it, when no messaging service would get to me?
Anakin: Simple. I would send it with sand. It gets everywhere.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Aug 02 2020
Historically, the Scottish fought off a British Invasion force 20x as big as their own
The British were simply out-plaid
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jun 29 2020
After watching Star Wars, my friend on tumblr told me he identifies as The Force
I guess that makes him a ForceKin
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 01 2020
How do you force Nintendo fans into a bus?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jun 04 2020
To make extra money, my professor forces all the students to buy his book at the beginning of the term.
Itβs textbook Economics.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jul 13 2020
An angry Air Force Registered Nurse is mad AF RN.
π︎ 31
π
︎ Apr 12 2020
Why canβt cows be affected by any strong force?
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 17 2020
What do you call it when Apple forces children in China to work for minimum wage?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jul 21 2020
If Apple ever created a police force....
Would it be called the Apple Corps?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jul 12 2020
Why was the Millennium Falcon easier to fly after the Force Awakens?
π︎ 115
π
︎ Sep 10 2019
"Help! There's a mysterous force pulling me into the floor!"
Wife: "Please get up off the floor and stop embarrassing yourself."
Dad: "Honey, do you not understand the gravity of this situation?!"
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Aug 20 2018
My friend once told me centrifugal force doesn't exist.
He was clearly out of the loop.
π︎ 73
π
︎ Oct 18 2019
Itβs not that hard to get into the Naval Forces.
I mean, we were all semen at one point.
π︎ 19
π
︎ Mar 19 2020
What is the elite division of space force called?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 23 2019
What do you call a dark side Force user who can't fight?
π︎ 11
π
︎ Mar 02 2020
My wife got really mad at me earlier when I tried to force feed our young son...
"Just use a spoon!" she said. "You're not a Jedi!"
π︎ 7k
π
︎ Oct 11 2017
What kind of currency does the Space Force use?
π︎ 86
π
︎ Nov 22 2018
A Force Field
π︎ 44
π
︎ Jul 30 2019
Everytime I do something I shouldn't do my dad force me to scroll through this subreddit
He calls it: "The Punishment"
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 06 2020
I've decided that when I become a dad, I'm not going to be the type who forces my kids to make their beds
I'll probably just buy them one from the store
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jan 01 2020
The greatest air force to ever exist
π︎ 30
π
︎ Mar 22 2019
Police forces are deflating the stats of seized drugs during the drug war campaign.
Apparently, they didn't do the math but they did the meth.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 08 2020
Gravity, one of the most basic forces in the Universe. But then again, if you remove it...
π︎ 7
π
︎ Nov 11 2020
Gravity's one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. What do you get when you remove it?
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Sep 27 2019
58 years ago today, Ringo joined forces with John, Paul, and George.
Pete got sacked, but it was for the Best.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Aug 15 2020
Gravity is one of the most essential forces in the universe. What do you get when you remove it?
π︎ 316
π
︎ Oct 01 2019
Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. What do you get when you remove it?
π︎ 18
π
︎ Nov 26 2019
My son was refusing to eat dinner, so I tried to force feed him.
My wife said, βUse the fricking spoon. You are not a Jedi.β
π︎ 110
π
︎ Apr 06 2019
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.