A shitload
I said no, I’m just making shit up.
Just for shits and giggles
Yet all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby.
It’s always just a matter of time until craps ruin my day
Shit’s expensive.
We've tried everything, but it remains undie turd.
Da pens
She’s got to be kid-ding me.
He was #2 in the household pecking order.
I don't want to make a quick, rash decision!
I got it for spare change
So my 1st Born came into this world on Monday night and we were discharged on Thursday. Upon leaving our room, we were given a metal cart to place our belongings on including our son (in his car seat). As we made our way to the garage, I noticed that when the cart was rolling his car seat would rock a bit. I took this opportunity to exclaim “hey (son’s name) you’re really rockin’ ‘n’ rollin’ now.” My wife then truly realized what is in store for her.
The box says they are good for up to 14 pounds.
It was just a brief discussion.
Number one and number two
But I think they are full of crap
Always on my ass and usually full of shit.
'What are the reasons?'
'#1, and #2'
'Oh grandpa...'
'You don't understand. #2 was a solid one'
'Stoooop'
'And you should already understand #1, it runs in your genes'
They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
Because it was in-continent!
We all had to wear diapers and we quickly recognised that masks in 2020 were not that bad.
Hey guys, relatively new dad here. Pretty proud of myself because this came naturally. My 7 mo daughter, wife and I were hiking yesterday. My daughter was strapped to the front of me, and she started to stink. We found a field to lay her on her changing mat and change her diaper. She had a complete explosion so it required an outfit change. I looked up at my wife and said “looks like I’ll be performing a field dressing”. Corny af I know, but it made my wife laugh 😆!
European man
(Courtesy of my husband)
My wife wishes I would change.
Hug HeeHees
When I tell him he's too young, he says he wants to join the infantry.
Butt up - butt up - butt up butt up butt up butt up butt up!
He’s pretty butthurt about it.
Occasionally I tell my wife, "We can't use that one, it already has Pooh on it."
off the Depends
They all just kinda run together at this point
Diapers come in sizes that are rated according to the baby's weight i.e. "up to 12 lbs". Every time my dad (grandpa to my kids) sees a pack of diapers he says " I don't think they'll hold that much ". Every. Single. Time.
It was a nursery crime.
They say they are rated for 14-18 lbs but they keep splitting open when they are only 4-5 lbs full.
Yet all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby.
I remembered the car seat, the stroller, and the diaper bag, but all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby
Yet all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby.
Yet all she can talk about is how I forgot the baby.
Number one And number two
