What do you call a man with no vacuum cleaner and itchy underwear ?

Novak Djokovic

(This is my fiancé’s favourite joke he wanted me to share with all of you because he thinks it will make me β€˜Reddit famous’) πŸ˜‚πŸ˜…

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Em1ly121
πŸ“…︎ May 21
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What do you call a mortician that steals dead people’s underwear?

An Undietaker.

πŸ‘︎ 245
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IGotGolfTips
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11
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A man went to buy long underwear cause the weather was getting cold. Cashier asked " How long would you like them"

From march to September said the man

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πŸ‘€︎ u/weebmemer69420
πŸ“…︎ May 21
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I always bring an extra pair of underwear when I go golfing

Just incase I get a hole in one.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rubNTugInc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10
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"Your underwear is much too tight and very revealing." I said to my wife.

She said, "Wear your own then, dickhead."

πŸ‘︎ 19k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
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When I get home I'm ripping off my wife's underwear...

.... my God they're cutting into my waist!

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tinnber
πŸ“…︎ May 13
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The teen was mortified when his mom brought up his underwear at dinner

It was a brief conversation

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πŸ“…︎ May 10
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What do you call a bounty hunter with no underwear?

The Commandolorian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lukinlbc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26
🚨︎ report
The trick to making successful puns is wearing fancy underwear.

That's my victorious secret.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/celbruk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29
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What do you call frozen underwear?

The Meat Locker

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Theunkillable
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06
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William Shatner, Star Trek’s Captain Kirk, is said to be extremely disappointed after the collapse of his recently launched women’s underwear business...

Apparently, nobody was interested in buying β€˜Shatner Panties’.

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 16
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I went on a tour of an underwear factory once.

It wasn't very long so my time there was brief.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zafpedx
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12
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Why don't chickens wear underwear?

Because their pecker's on their face.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mlenotyou
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10
🚨︎ report
The name for the drawer where I keep my underwear?

Brief case

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FortuneAndGlory
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30
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What's a lawyer's favorite kind of underwear?

Briefs, but sports writers love boxers, and special forces soldiers go commando.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/breakone9r
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28
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When I get home my wife's underwear is coming straight off...

They're cutting right into my hips.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tinnber
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14
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Why doesn’t Santa wear any underwear?

...because he’s Saint Knicker-less!

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/monkfish-online
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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Where’s the best place to keep your underwear?

In your drawers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hollywoodhank
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19
🚨︎ report
I was buying the wife some underwear, I asked the shop assistant;

β€œAre these knickers satin?" "No” she said, β€œThey’re brand new...”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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Why don't chickens wear underwear?

Because their peckers are on their faces.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/noapostrophe555
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
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Today I saw my wife walk by with her sexiest underwear on, which could mean just one thing.

It’s laundry day.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
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What kind of boat only hauls women's underwear?

A pantiliner!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CognitiveNerd1701
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
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Which kind of snakes share underwear?

Cobra

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
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I had a standoff with my underwear

It was a brief moment

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yzakwann
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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What type of underwear does a yard wear?

Lawngerie.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlissedIgnorance
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
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I stole a lawyer’s underwear right before court.

There’s no way he’ll succeed without his legal briefs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IMadeItGuys
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
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What kind of underwear do vegetables wear?

Planties.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/beardwithablog
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
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What kind of underwear do meteorologists wear?

Kelvin Klein

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Manou_Sauce
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
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What Do You Call a Lawyer’s Underwear?

Legal briefs

I can’t take credit for this joke; I got it from Frasier.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrGeekman
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
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Did you hear William Shatner was starting his own underwear line?

But β€œShatner Panties” was not a good business.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/awburrou
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2020
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What do my underwear and Snapchat have in common?

Streaks ✌️

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LouisCKY
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
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A pair of underwear walked into the bar, ordered a drink, and began to tell the bartender a story. He went on and on and on.

The bartender interrupted him and said, "Hey can you make this brief?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ht_86
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
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Did you hear the story of the missing thong underwear?

It’s a whale of a tale.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SkinniJimmi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
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For a second, I couldn’t decide what underwear to buy.

It was a moment of brief indecision.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/maybejaeby
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
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I shot a bear in my underwear this morning.

What he was doing in my underwear, I'll never know

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blechniven
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
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My girlfriend keeps hiding underwear

It's Victoria's Secret.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ItsSuperRob
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
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There has been some good news today as a plus-size clairvoyant announces they are releasing a charity calendar, with pictures of them in their underwear.

Fans of the psychic say that they are looking forward to seeing a large medium in smalls.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/megamouth2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
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Don’t go to Chernobyl without wearing two pairs of underwear.

Or else, Chernobyl Fallout.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_SquidYT
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2020
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My friend did not believe in the existence of underwear for apes.

I told her to looked them up and showed her on the internet .

I said "Ha!... Chimp pants, see?".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
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I created a Coronavirus facemask out of underwear

It worked briefly

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2020
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I put on the wrong underwear today.

It was a slip-up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
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I was doing the vaccuming in the underwear the other day and I thought to myself

how do my balls get this dusty?

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/samharmes
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
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I tried to help my wife with laundry by putting her underwear away.

But she got her panties in a bunch over it.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2020
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I just saw my wife walk by with her sexiest underwear on, which can only mean one thing.

It’s laundry day.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I just caught a glimpse of my wife wearing her sexy underwear. This can only mean one thing.

Today is laundry day.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2018
🚨︎ report
What type of underwear do lawyers wear to court?

Legal briefs

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IMadeItGuys
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I just saw my wife walk by with her sexiest underwear on, which can only mean one thing.

It’s laundry day.

πŸ‘︎ 144
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
🚨︎ report

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