My daughter wanted to clean her cardboard rocketship with her face cloth...

Trying to reduce the enormous amount of laundry associated with kids,

I said, "you don't need to clean your rocketship. It's not dirty. Space is a vacuum"....

I could hear my wife's eyes roll in the next room. Success!

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tren898
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know why table cloths are the work of the devil?

Because they are made of satin

Ba-dum-tssss

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thegoldchicken
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I'll try but cloths on.
πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/recoro06
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Does anyone know how to get stains out of cloth diapers?

We've tried everything, but it remains undie turd.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lan_mcdo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend lied when he said he didn’t make an entire book out of cloth.

His story was completely fabricated.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
🚨︎ report
The guy who colors the cloth quit my uncle's factory without warning.

My uncle's in dyer need.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
🚨︎ report
You guys want to hear a joke about cloth?

It’s quite the yarn.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedShirtCashion
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend was up until 2am pretending to be absorbent cloth

She's a real night towel

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2020
🚨︎ report
This is an image of an obese, yet philosophical man of the cloth.
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shuffle-Tee
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Taking over the universe with cloth
πŸ‘︎ 74
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AMswag123
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Accidentally used a dirty cloth to try and clean the table.

Instant ragret.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drozzi007
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend lied about creating a cloth that can easily be ripped to remove sleeves...

It was a tearable fabrication!

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What's a Russian's favorite cloth?

Lenin

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/op3880
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
🚨︎ report
I had to give an impromptu speech on a piece of cloth that encircles the wrist...

I spoke off the cuff on the cuff.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the reused cloth label group?

They are the real rag tag team.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ruminino
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call the small piece of cloth that is in charge of all your cravings?

Your HankerChief.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mitfrenzy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a genie who can only grant cloth-related wishes?

A wishing machine.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/adgrig
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Why didn’t the piece of cloth come to school today?

Because he didn’t feel too-well.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I once went to work drunk and put too many double or multiple folds in a garment or other item made of cloth, held by stitching at the top or side.

It was replete with pleats.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I got cloth napkins for the holidays. They’re a pun goldmine.
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aerlenbach
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2017
🚨︎ report
I got fired from my job of making a double or multiple fold in a garment or other item made of cloth, held by stitching the top or side.

I was de-pleated.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you clean cloth nappies (diapers)?

Boil the shit out of them.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2018
🚨︎ report
People believed me when I said I'd covered my house in cloth.

But it was a complete fabrication.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2017
🚨︎ report
What type of cloth does the Soviet Union use

Lenin

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Emoti723
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a woman of the cloth who becomes a lawyer?

Bar Nun

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/witz33
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2018
🚨︎ report
Why do Alaskans wash their cloths in tide?

because it is too cold out tide.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/themannamedme
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2016
🚨︎ report
Watching a show where researchers collect bugs using a large cotton cloth dragged over the grass to count them

Dad - Guess you could call that a tick sheet

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GrumpyErnie
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2014
🚨︎ report

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