Two Cleaners In A Car...

Broom Broom

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
🚨︎ report
what vacuum cleaner has no male heirs

dyson

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πŸ‘€︎ u/twitchard
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
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I had to sell my vacuum cleaner

It was just gathering dust

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vamplestat666
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
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I sold my vacuum cleaner today..

All it was doing was collecting dust

πŸ‘︎ 98
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snugl-v203
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
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Yesterday I fired my cleaner.

I'm glad that's done and dusted

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πŸ‘€︎ u/northernsou
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
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My dad attacked me with a vacuum cleaner today, yelling.....

Dyson, Dyson.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
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I sold my old vacuum cleaner...

... it sucked. All it did was gather dust.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FirstHomosapien
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
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I’ve decided to sell my vacuum cleaner this week...

It’s just collecting dust.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/audiomandan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Who makes the most filicidal vaccuum cleaner

Dyson

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πŸ‘€︎ u/twitchard
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
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I got a vacuum cleaner from Wish.com

It sucks

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rckidyt
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
If you clean a vacuum cleaner...

...you make the vacuum cleaner.

If you make a living out of it, you'd be called the vacuum cleaner.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NecroUknown
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
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Just bought a vacuum cleaner, from a Buddhist selling them door to door. I should have known better..

..it came with no attachments.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
My window cleaner was banging on my window shouting and swearing!

I thought to myself: He’s lost his rag.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_houser
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Customer: I want to return this vaccum cleaner.

Salesperson: Why? Customer: It sucks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Harrytheharami
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend is addicted to brake cleaner

He says he can stop whenever he wants

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πŸ‘€︎ u/XDG-Diggz74
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What do guitarists and cleaners have in common?

They’re both good at sweeping

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StAnger99
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy who got rid of his vacuum cleaner?

It was just gathering dust.

Sorry. Won't do another vacuum joke. They suck.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yorkshirenation
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
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I surprised my family today by changing careers to become a mirror cleaner.

It was something I could always see myself doing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhiskeyBadger_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
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I prefer to use the vacuum cleaner with boxing gloves on

They call me Dyson Fury

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Barderz
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I would like a set of containers for my kitchen. I would like to store my baking soda, borax, milk of magnesia, drain cleaner, and ammonia. Most importantly, they need to have very secure lids.

I like to keep all my bases covered.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Legitimate-Hair
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
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Real house cleaners aren’t just born their maid
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AMswag123
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A man stained his vest and took it to the dry cleaners

While the vest was waiting to be cleaned it had a chat with 2 other vests around it It said β€œ My owner stained me and I’m scared it won’t get off

One said β€œIt’s going to be okay no need to worry”

The other one said β€œ Yeah it happens to the vest of us”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Donkeydayyy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call someone who cleans a vaccum cleaner?

A vaccum cleaner.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MyPillowGuy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
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My wife claims that vacuum cleaners are always better for cleaning than a brush.

I said, β€œThat’s a sweeping generalization.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
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I snuck up behind my daughter and whispered, "I think our microwave and our TV are spying on us!!! And I also think our vacuum cleaner..."

"...has been gathering dirt on us for years!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the father say to his baby boy before killing him with a vacuum cleaner?

Dyson

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πŸ‘€︎ u/excalibron
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I hate vacuum cleaners...

They suck.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Di_Ma_Re_Bra
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
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I bought some engine cleaner. The label said β€˜Known to cause cancer in the state of California.’

Good thing I’m using it in Missouri.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sethrymir
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2020
🚨︎ report
True house cleaners aren't just born...

...they're maid...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What did I say when my son tried to unplug my life support to plug in the vacuum cleaner?

Don't do that I'll dyson!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dinsy_Crow
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
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Her: Obviously, everyone prefers to use a vacuum cleaner to a brush.

Me: Isn’t that.....a sweeping generalization?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My good mate asked me if robotic vacuum cleaners are any good, as she wants to buy one.

I told her; "Don't bother buying one, they suck"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spartan17492
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I had a job at a dry cleaners...

but got fired for wasting time. They said I had more PRESSING matters.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/youtellmebob
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Tonight is a sad night... our robotic vacuum cleaner, Wall-E, killed our bathroom spider, Al Gore.

Why was our bathroom spider named Al Gore? Simple. He created the web.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DamnRedhead
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A guy starts working at a submarine. In the first day he works as a cleaner, then helps at the kitchen. Next day he runs the ship. In the evening he’s absolutely exhausted so he asks his friend β€œWhy I have to change my position every time?”

He replies β€œI know, this sub is full of reposts”

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I sold my vaccum cleaner today .

All it was doing was collecting dust .

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ivanshu
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to sell my vacuum cleaner...

It was only gathering dust.

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
me: *cleans vacuum cleaner*

I’m a vacuum cleaner

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SmeltingFire
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
i recently sold my vacuum cleaner

all it was doing was gathering dust

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jayraj77
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I got a new vacuum cleaner today...

It sucks

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bogan_gopnik
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
When you clean the vaccum cleaner, you become the vaccum cleaner
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MarshmelloFan135
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner

It was just collecting dust

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chicomagnifico
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
🚨︎ report
True house cleaners aren't just born

They're maid

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to sell my vacuum cleaner the other day.

It was just gathering dust.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ter9193
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I sold my vaccum cleaner

Because it was just gathering dust

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
🚨︎ report
If you clean a vacuum cleaner... you become a vacuum cleaner

This one sucks

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Asharkinator
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report

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