What do you call a man with no vacuum cleaner and itchy underwear ?

Novak Djokovic

(This is my fiancé’s favourite joke he wanted me to share with all of you because he thinks it will make me β€˜Reddit famous’) πŸ˜‚πŸ˜…

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Em1ly121
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Whether you use your vacuum cleaner daily or not at all...

It's always going to collect dust.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hanya_124
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2021
🚨︎ report
My new vacuum cleaner is alright.

It doesn't suck as much as my last one.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wasprobot
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I hate vacuum cleaners.

They suck!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CuteAutumnBear
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
🚨︎ report
I’m putting our vacuum cleaner up for sale

It’s just collecting dust.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crayonfingers
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2021
🚨︎ report
I don’t like vacuum cleaners

They suck.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/goddred
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the vacuum cleaner salesman say before murdering his son?

Dyson!

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fryin-and-buyin
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I sold my vacuum cleaner...

It was just gathering dust.

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ash_bel
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner ?

The position of the dirt bag

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kaoskrim
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
🚨︎ report
I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner...

Well, it was just collecting dust.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/beej2000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
🚨︎ report
I just bought a vacuum cleaner off of Wish.com

It sucks

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
Got a new vacuum cleaner today.

Boy does it suck.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dano558
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2021
🚨︎ report
I taught my cat to speak and ask her why does she hate vacuum cleaners.

β€œThey suck” said the cat.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/redpandarox
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2021
🚨︎ report
what vacuum cleaner has no male heirs

dyson

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/twitchard
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
🚨︎ report
My dad attacked me with a vacuum cleaner today, yelling.....

Dyson, Dyson.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Just bought a vacuum cleaner, from a Buddhist selling them door to door. I should have known better..

..it came with no attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I sold my old vacuum cleaner...

... it sucked. All it did was gather dust.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FirstHomosapien
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy who got rid of his vacuum cleaner?

It was just gathering dust.

Sorry. Won't do another vacuum joke. They suck.

πŸ‘︎ 118
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yorkshirenation
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I prefer to use the vacuum cleaner with boxing gloves on

They call me Dyson Fury

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Barderz
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I snuck up behind my daughter and whispered, "I think our microwave and our TV are spying on us!!! And I also think our vacuum cleaner..."

"...has been gathering dirt on us for years!"

πŸ‘︎ 102
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife claims that vacuum cleaners are always better for cleaning than a brush.

I said, β€œThat’s a sweeping generalization.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the father say to his baby boy before killing him with a vacuum cleaner?

Dyson

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/excalibron
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What did I say when my son tried to unplug my life support to plug in the vacuum cleaner?

Don't do that I'll dyson!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dinsy_Crow
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Her: Obviously, everyone prefers to use a vacuum cleaner to a brush.

Me: Isn’t that.....a sweeping generalization?

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My good mate asked me if robotic vacuum cleaners are any good, as she wants to buy one.

I told her; "Don't bother buying one, they suck"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spartan17492
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Tonight is a sad night... our robotic vacuum cleaner, Wall-E, killed our bathroom spider, Al Gore.

Why was our bathroom spider named Al Gore? Simple. He created the web.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DamnRedhead
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I bought a new vacuum cleaner yesterday

It really sucked

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Laamamies123
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Does anyone want to buy my old vacuum cleaner?

It’s just gathering dust.

πŸ‘︎ 579
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jesus_Shaves_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2018
🚨︎ report
No matter what vacuum cleaner you buy

They all suck

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PdawgUltimate
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
🚨︎ report
If youβ€˜re a tester for vacuum cleaners and the vacuum sucks. Is a good or a bad vacuum?
πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JovaJoda
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I regret getting that new vacuum cleaner,

It sucks a lot!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRapist729
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I sold my vacuum cleaner

It just sucked

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/idkqwerty1
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
🚨︎ report
I had to sell my vacuum cleaner

It was just gathering dust

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vamplestat666
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I don’t like vacuum cleaners

They really suck

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/whydatduck66
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
I had to sell my vacuum cleaner...

It was only gathering dust.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ve decided to sell my vacuum cleaner this week...

It’s just collecting dust.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/audiomandan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I got a vacuum cleaner from Wish.com

It sucks

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rckidyt
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
i recently sold my vacuum cleaner

all it was doing was gathering dust

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jayraj77
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
me: *cleans vacuum cleaner*

I’m a vacuum cleaner

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SmeltingFire
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
If you clean a vacuum cleaner...

...you make the vacuum cleaner.

If you make a living out of it, you'd be called the vacuum cleaner.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NecroUknown
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I got a new vacuum cleaner today...

It sucks

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bogan_gopnik
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner

It was just collecting dust

πŸ‘︎ 202
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chicomagnifico
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I hate vacuum cleaners...

They suck.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Di_Ma_Re_Bra
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to sell my vacuum cleaner the other day.

It was just gathering dust.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ter9193
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I hate vacuum cleaners. They suck.
πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
If you clean a vacuum cleaner... you become a vacuum cleaner

This one sucks

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Asharkinator
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Does anyone want a used vacuum cleaner?

Mine is just gathering dust

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
🚨︎ report

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