There were 30 cows and 28 chicken. How many didn't?
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︎ Apr 19 2021
There were 30 students but only 28 chicken nuggets. How many kids didnβt get any nuggets?
Ten. Why? Because only twenty ate chicken nuggets.
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︎ Apr 20 2021
I put on 30 jackets all on top of each other. Someone called and asked if I was coming out, I said sorry I canβt...
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︎ Apr 02 2021
I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror one evening admiring my reflection, when I posed this question to my wife of 30 years, βWill you still love me when Iβm old, fat, and balding?β She smiled and answered...
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︎ Mar 27 2021
I'm meeting him at 2:30
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︎ Jan 31 2021
6:30 is the best time
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︎ Dec 19 2020
*This is a literal Dad Joke my father used to tell when I was a kid about 30 years ago. He's almost 80 now and it still makes him laugh.* - So, there was this man named James Fart. Everybody made fun of him since he was very young. "James Fart! James Fart" the bullies used to make him cry...
He came of age among this suffering and at 21 was finally able to legally change his name. He arrived at the government office where he presented himself:
-I'm James Fart and I want to legally change my name!
Of course they laughed at him (everybody did) but eventually they all settled and came around to the situation.
-Ok, so... your current name is.. Β·chucklesΒ· James Fart... I'm sorry, I just...
-I know, everybody has been laughing at my name since as long as I can remember.
After a long and tedious process, everything is ready.
-Very well, sorry for the delays but you know how hard this protocols are. The good news: you are no longer "James Fart", what name do you want instead?
-Charles Fart.
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︎ May 06 2020
Its 1:30 and im drunk, thought this was comical
What did the hispanic who took 2 too many drugs say? Help i think I over(dos)ed
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︎ Oct 28 2020
In 30 min, the Christmas Island and Samoa will welcome the new year.
For them, hindsight is 2020
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︎ Dec 31 2020
What do you call a furniture store that isover 30 km away?
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︎ Nov 21 2020
I should've gone to bed at least 30 minutes ago...
But I suppose everybody's hindsight is 2020.
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︎ Jan 01 2021
Recent father. Yesterday my wife told me we βwould be having dinner at around 6:30, 7 oβclockβ
I told her I might be running late and asked if we could make it 6:38 instead?
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︎ Oct 23 2020
10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80, and 90 walked into a bar
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︎ Nov 22 2020
My son asked we to pay for his rifle test today. It was $30.
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︎ Nov 13 2020
After 30 years of marriage, I can both proudly and firmly declare that I still wear the pants in my family...
My wife just tells me which ones to wear.
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︎ Sep 19 2020
I took my wife to an orchard for her birthday and we stood there looking at the trees for about 30 minutes
Not the Apple Watch she was expecting apparently.
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︎ Aug 10 2020
A man was sentenced to 20 years in prison when he inadvertently contaminated the food supply of 30 specimens of Americaβs national bird.
His actions were highly ill-eagle
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︎ Sep 23 2020
I give myself 30 minutes in my daily schedule to do abs.
I call that time period Crunch Time.
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︎ Sep 25 2020
They say that 40 is the new 30
Kent traffic police beg to differ...
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︎ Jul 25 2020
Did you guys hear about the microbiologist who traveled to 30 countries and speaks 6 languages?
He was a wise man of many cultures.
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︎ Sep 08 2020
I book all my dental appointments for 2:30...
So I can tell the receptionist that I've arrived... for my tooth hurty...
I'm so sorry..
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︎ Aug 23 2020
A stone thrown into a pond in 1990 has been wet for around 30 years.
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︎ May 28 2020
What happened when 30 got hungry?
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︎ Jun 18 2019
Did you know a school of piranha can devour a child in 30 seconds
Anyhow today I lost my job at the aquarium
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︎ Mar 01 2020
I wanted to buy a $30 meal for my father, my grandfather and father-in-law. I figured they'd lump em all together and charge a reduced fee...
But no. I was charged $30 a pop.
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︎ Feb 27 2020
A couple on 60 years met a genie and they got 1 wish each The wife wished sheβd travel the world so she did. The husband wanted a 30 years younger wife
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︎ Jun 21 2020
Started to learn to tell time on a analog clock last week. So far I can only tell when itβs 6:30
But I got that one hands down.
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︎ Jun 26 2020
I lost 30 pounds in a week...
I really hate losing money.
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︎ Feb 11 2020
Why did the sheep dog bring home 30 sheep, when there were only 26?
Because he rounded them up!
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︎ May 20 2020
Did you know my dad drive a truck for 30 years?
He was bad with directions.
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︎ Feb 27 2020
I met a Kung Fu master who has stayed in 30 yurts in the last 30 days
He's on a roundhouse kick.
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︎ Jun 08 2020
Did you hear about the Franciscan Friar who inherited 30 million dollars?
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︎ Jan 21 2020
I put on 30 jackets one on top of the other, someone calls me and asks me to go out, I said I canβt ...
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︎ Feb 25 2021
My favorite time of the day is 6:30
π︎ 63
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︎ Dec 13 2020
6:30 is the best time of day...
π︎ 46
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︎ Dec 13 2020
6.30 is the best time.
π︎ 8
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︎ Dec 18 2020
6:30 is the best time on a clock
π︎ 56
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︎ Jul 31 2020
6:30 is the best time of the day.
π︎ 30
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︎ Aug 11 2020
6:30 is my favorite time. Hands down.
π︎ 10k
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︎ Jan 01 2019
The best time on an analogue watch is 6:30
π︎ 9
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︎ Aug 18 2020
My favorite time of the day is 6:30
π︎ 89
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︎ Dec 08 2019
6:30 is the best time on a clock.
π︎ 7k
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︎ Jan 19 2018
6:30 is the best time of day.
π︎ 92
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︎ Dec 07 2019
6:30 is my favorite time of the day
π︎ 65
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︎ Feb 01 2020
6:30 is hands down the best time on a clock
π︎ 131
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︎ Sep 07 2019
The best time on the clock is 6:30.
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︎ Feb 24 2020
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