A man walks into an open casket funeral and approaches the widow at the front. He asks: "Mind if I say a word?". "No, go ahead" she replies.

"Bargain" the man says.

"Thanks" the woman replies. "That means a great deal."

👍︎ 26
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👤︎ u/giftfrom
📅︎ Jan 31 2021
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I was at a friends funeral and I said to the widow “do you mind if I say a word?”

She said go ahead.

I stood up said “plethora” and sat back down.

“Thank you”, the grieving widow responded, “it means a lot”

👍︎ 51
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👤︎ u/jediwag
📅︎ Jan 07 2021
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Schrödinger’s Widow

“Open casket or closed” asked the Funeral Director.

“Yes” replied Schrödinger’s Widow.

👍︎ 16
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👤︎ u/phlebasuk
📅︎ Jan 10 2021
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A widow is mourning at her husband's grave site. A gentleman walks by and says "If you don't mind, I'd like to say a word."

"That would be nice" she said. "Plethora"..... "Thanks, that means a lot."

👍︎ 8
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📅︎ Oct 28 2020
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At a funeral, a little old man goes up to the grieving widow.

"May I say a word?"

Sniffling, the widow agrees. The old man clears his throat, "Plethora"

"The widow smiles. "Thanks, that means a lot."

👍︎ 48
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📅︎ May 26 2020
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I have a friend who is obsessed with the Scarlett Witch, Captain Marvel, and Black Widow.

I guess you can say he's a heroine addict.

👍︎ 12
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📅︎ Jul 02 2020
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A widow was at a funeral today, lost her husband.

The funeral director asked, “Can I say a quick word?” “Sure,” replied the widow. “Thank you,” the funeral director responded, “Plethora” “Thanks, means a lot” replied the widow

👍︎ 8
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📅︎ May 16 2020
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My dad is obsessed with Wonder Woman, Catwoman and the Black Widow.

I think he's a heroine addict.

👍︎ 47
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📅︎ Feb 03 2020
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What did the widow who just buried her fourth husband say?

Another male in the coffin.

👍︎ 7
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👤︎ u/bismuth21
📅︎ Apr 23 2020
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A man decided to attend his friend's funeral. He approached his friend's widow and after a consoling hug said "Plethora".

She responded "Thanks that means a lot".

👍︎ 139
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👤︎ u/jcksn_m
📅︎ Oct 21 2019
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Why did the widow join a marathon?

It was her mourning run.

👍︎ 4
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👤︎ u/andeleidun
📅︎ Feb 07 2020
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A man goes to a dear friend's funeral. He asks the widow if he could say a word for the deceased.

She says "Go ahead".
He says "Plethora".
She thinks for a second, looks down and replies "Thank you. That means a lot".

👍︎ 90
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📅︎ Feb 15 2019
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I went fishing in the North of England with Kurt Cobain's widow

And said to her "Cought any love?"

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📅︎ Nov 22 2019
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My 6 year-old got me this morning listening to "Black Widow" in the car.

Him - Why is it called "Black Widow, Baby"?

Me - Because Black Widows are notorious for killing their husbands.

Him - It should be called "Black Bear Pirate"

Me - Why?

Him - Because they say "You should've known better than to mess with me honey."

👍︎ 2k
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📅︎ Dec 12 2014
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What does a pregnant widow have?

Mourning sickness

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👤︎ u/VexNinja
📅︎ May 19 2019
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Why did the widow shut down the family business?

foreclosure

👍︎ 7
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📅︎ Mar 11 2019
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Did you hear about the widow who was married to a wall

She just can't get over him

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📅︎ Oct 01 2017
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Guy walks up to the widow at her husband's funeral and says, “May I just say one word?”

“Sure,” she replies. “Plethora,” the guys says. The widow says, “Thanks. That means a lot.”

👍︎ 12
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📅︎ May 15 2020
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A man asks a widow to say something at her husbands funeral...

She says of course

The man says "plethora"

The widow says "Thanks. That's means a lot"

👍︎ 4
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👤︎ u/epmtunes
📅︎ Jan 13 2019
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