Saw a guy driving a truck with a port-a-potty attached to the back...

He must have a shitty job.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ProDisco
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2020
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Why does the Norwegian navy put barcodes on their ships when returning to port?

So they can Scan da Navy in

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πŸ‘€︎ u/buccaschlitz
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2018
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If you are stuck in USB port

but believe you are a Display Port

Perhaps you are a "transport"?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/neospygil
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
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So a boat was having second thoughts about docking on a port.

Why?

Because of pier pressure.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2019
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My boat drifted off from the port. If you find

report it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kinjago
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2019
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What is a birds favourite port on the back of a TV?

AV in.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/broccolibadass
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2018
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A scuba diver and a marine sit at the port

The scuba diver turns to the marine and says "I can't handle this job anymore, I undergo too much pressure"

The marine looks at the diver and tells him "It may be hard now, but once you get used to it it'll all be smooth sailing"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kiwi-the-Kiwi
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2018
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Why didn't the captain get any action at the port?

He kept his log in his cabin.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/2106au
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2017
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All wine lovers start with drinking port wine!

It's a gateway wine

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πŸ‘€︎ u/caposkni
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2018
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Person at the dinner table: "Would you like some Port?"

Me: "I prefer Starboard."

Not actually a dad, but I feel like this is the right place.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/billyboogie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2014
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Why does the Norwegian navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they get back to port, they can Scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDisneyDork
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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Why does Norway have barcodes on the sides of it's ships ?

So that when they come back to the port they can "scan-di-navian"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gp_11
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20
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Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on their boats?

So when they pull up to port, they can Scandanavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gabz09
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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Why does Norway have bar codes on the sides of their military ships?

It's so when they all come to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Turb0charg3d
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
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Why does the Norway Navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/artofmuziq88
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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My friend got a job with a trucking company hauling beehives cross country.

Guess that makes him a U.S. bee driver.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/emjay144
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
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Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/clairem2113
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
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What’s the difference between a well dressed man on a tricycle and a portly dressed man on a bicycle?

Attire.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/stump2003
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2018
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What is police officers' favorite type of room to find criminals?

Arrest room!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gizzmo3000
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2020
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Why does Sweden have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

It’s so when they enter the port, they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/robindc_93
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
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Did you know the Norwegian Navy place bar codes on their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavyin.

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
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Did you know the Norway Navy has barcodes on the sides of their ships?

So when they return to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mercury1091
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
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Why does the Norway navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PlayerMig
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
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A captain and his crew. (Hopefully hasn’t been posted before lol)

Once upon a time there was a pirate captain who was the most amazing best captain a crew could ever ask for. His crew loved him more than anything and would do absolutely anything for him.

One day as they were sailing, a crew member In the crows nest shouts, β€œone ship off the port side!” Immediately the captain yells at his crew, β€œMen! Bring me my red shirt!”

Slightly confused, the men hesitate for a second and then hurry off to bring the captain his red shirt. Amazingly they win the battle!

The men are so happy and thankful their captain brought them safely through the battle they don’t even care why the captain wanted his red shirt.

A few months of sailing some more, again the man in the crows nest yells, β€œTwo ships off the port side!” Quickly the captain screams, β€œMen! Bring me my red shirt!” The crew doesn’t hesitate this time to get him his red shirt and what do you know? They win this battle too!!

The crew is astounded at their captains awesomeness!!! They honestly could not find anyone better. This time though the crew stops a moment and asks the captain, β€œWhy do you always have us bring you your red shirt?”

The captain replies, β€œWell men, if I get stabbed the blood will blend into my red shirt and it will look like I’m not hurt so that you will all fight as hard as if I were still alive.”

The men can’t believe what they hear! How could they be so lucky as to have a captain so incredibly smart and courageous??!!

Two seconds later, β€œTWENTY SEVEN SHIPS OFF THE PORT SIDE!!!!!!!”

Calmly, with an even tone, the captain says, β€œMen, bring me my brown pants.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RecTym
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
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Why do Norway's battleships have barcodes on the side of them?

So when they enter port, they can Scandinavian!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
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Why does Norway's navy have barcodes on the sides of the ships?

So when they come back to port, they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spookycheesepuff
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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Why does the Norwegian Navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

So when they come back to port, they can Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hairyballzak
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
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What do you call a bee from America?

A USB

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThaRedditAddict
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
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Why does Norway have barcodes on their battleships?

So when they get back to port, they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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Why do the Norwegian, Swedish and Danish Navies have barcodes on their ships?

So that when they come to port, they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheReal_BlueBoi
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2020
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Why does the Norwegian Navy have barcodes on their ships

So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/renegaderis
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
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Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/victor_devito
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
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What is a sailor's favorite type of art?

Port-raiture

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WinterWolf041
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
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Denmark, Norway, and Sweden just implemented bar codes on all their military ships.

That way, whenever one of them comes into port, they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/movieguy2004
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2020
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On what side of the cargo ship do they load all the USB charging cables?

The Port side.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GotMyOrangeCrush
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
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Why do Norwegian ships have barcodes on them?

So when they come in to port, they can scan the navy in. (Scandinavian)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/krispyk84
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
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So the Norwegian Navy is painting their ships with a bar code pattern

So when then come into port, they can Scandanavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ouyin2000
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
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Why does Norway's navy have bar codes on the sides of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brizzo7
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
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Why do Norwegian warships have barcodes on the side?

Because when they return to port, they can.....

Scandinavian!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AusRoX123
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2020
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Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the side of their boats?

So when they come back to port they can...

Scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePoeticElixir
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2017
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Why don't pirates buy ships from Apple?

Well they did at first. Then Apple removed all the ports.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
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Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jbizzlebev
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeopardusMaximus
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do the Norway navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/charliealphazulu
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2020
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Why do the Norwegian Navy have barcodes on all their ships?

So when they come back to port, they can... Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rjaramillo96
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2020
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Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when the come back to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrClapCheeks
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
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