Breaking News: In the Atlantic Ocean a ship carrying red paint has collided with a ship carrying purple paint

It’s believed both crews have been marooned

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πŸ‘€︎ u/simfy44
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
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Norway just made the decision to put QR codes on the side of all its war ships.

Now they can Scandinavian!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ValkornDoA
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17
🚨︎ report
Why do Swedish war ships have barcodes painted in the side?

So when they come in they can Scandinavian.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thee-lorax-
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 304
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clairem2113
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27
🚨︎ report
Did you know the Norwegian Navy place bar codes on their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavyin.

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 31
🚨︎ report
Did you know the Norway Navy has barcodes on the sides of their ships?

So when they return to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mercury1091
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
🚨︎ report
I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together.

Riveting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 19
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norway navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PlayerMig
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07
🚨︎ report
While waiting in the lobby of a Chinese restaurant, Don was admiring a painting on the wall of a Chinese sailing vessel and said to his friend Mike: β€œIsn’t that a great looking ship?” Mike replied:

β€œIt’s junk”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bardbelle
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11
🚨︎ report
in the 1700’s there was a ship called 3.14

it belonged to Ο€ rates

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sleepcow
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19
🚨︎ report
Sinking Ship [OC]
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wagespages
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norwegian Navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

So when they come back to port, they can Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hairyballzak
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
🚨︎ report
Why does Norway's navy have barcodes on the sides of the ships?

So when they come back to port, they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spookycheesepuff
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
Last night I watched a documentary on how ships are made.

It was riveting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SimonDanziger
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24
🚨︎ report
What do you call a snail on a ship?

A snailor

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πŸ‘€︎ u/uncandy1965
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12
🚨︎ report
Where can you buy a used pirate ship?

Sea-BAY

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrivensAndShips
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
🚨︎ report
TIFU by boarding the wrong ship and almost starting World War III

Sorry, wrong sub

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bignicky9
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08
🚨︎ report
Whats it like working on a cruise ship?

It has it's ups and downs

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πŸ‘€︎ u/airhogg
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23
🚨︎ report
Norway’s started putting barcodes on their ships...

...so they can scan da navy in.

(Not mine; saw it on Facebook)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kilmarnock228
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22
🚨︎ report
Abandoned... so you could almost say the owner was sick of this ship.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Samerdown
πŸ“…︎ May 10
🚨︎ report
I just saw a ship builder hit a guy with a structure that runs along the center of a ship's bottom...

He keeled the other fellow just like that!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
🚨︎ report
What did the pirate say when the ship's wheel ended up in his pants?

Arrgh, you're drivin me nuts!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NuccSucc
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11
🚨︎ report
Why did the kraken eat 5 ships that were carrying potatoes?

Because nobody can eat just one potato ship.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mama_Bear15
πŸ“…︎ May 31
🚨︎ report
There are historical accounts of Attila and his army seeing strange otherworldly ships hovering over the battlefields.

These were Hun Identified Flying Objects.

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πŸ“…︎ May 28
🚨︎ report
Why'd the giant octopus eat 2 ships filled with potatoes?

Cuz you can't eat just one potato ship.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Boofaka
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
If someone makes their fortune in ships, we call them a shipping magnate. If someone makes their fortune in oil, we call them an oil magnate. What do you call someone who makes their fortune...

...selling fridges?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 02
🚨︎ report
O watched a documentary on how ships are kept together.

It was riveting!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/imnotlouise
πŸ“…︎ May 05
🚨︎ report
What happened when the red ship and the blue ship crashed

They were marooned

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
Why do the Norwegian, Swedish and Danish Navies have barcodes on their ships?

So that when they come to port, they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheReal_BlueBoi
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the layoffs aboard the haunted pirate ship?

They're down to a skeleton crew.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fizzmore
πŸ“…︎ May 04
🚨︎ report
I'm a sea captain, my crew was goofing off at the back of the ship...

... I had to give them a stern warning.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 04
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A train engineer believed a hospital ship was the site of secret government conspiracy and decides to ram it with his train.

Now that's what I call a loco-motive.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KROMATIXX_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02
🚨︎ report
A red ship and a blue ship crashed

The survivors were left marooned

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eggycrunchyb0b
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12
🚨︎ report
The captain wanted all sailors of German descent to come out onto the top ship platform and line up...

It was all Hans on deck!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
My friend made shoes out of toy ships and planes.

When asked about it, he said he wanted to be fleet of foot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 03
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norwegian Navy have barcodes on their ships

So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/renegaderis
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24
🚨︎ report
Eduardo Moreno tried to crash his train into a Navy hospital ship to expose a supposed conspiracy

That’s a crime with a loco motive

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shantron5000
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03
🚨︎ report
Where a sick ship goes?

It goes to the dock.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 12
🚨︎ report
The new sailor, Leo, asked me where the ship's cook could be found.

I said, "He's in the Galley, Leo."

I swear, that guy struts around like all the planets revolve around him.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Konamicoder
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14
🚨︎ report
What did the American sailor say when he was brought on board the British ship?

I'm impressed!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeffvanlaethem
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23
🚨︎ report
An American ship is sinking off the German coast.

The captain goes to use the radio to get help and says β€œwe’re sinking! We’re sinking!”

The German operator answers β€œwhat are you sinking about?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoamTheSHEEP
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04
🚨︎ report
What vegetable isnt allowed on cruise ships?

Leeks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlobbyChong
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21
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When I was in the Navy, I was often told to go to the rear of the ship...

They were stern orders.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24
🚨︎ report
What do you call two friends on a ship?

A friendship.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kat_m1990
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the cruise ship that got stuck in the Panama Canal with dead people aboard?

They're in a die-er strait.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/victor_devito
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does Norway put barcodes on their military ships?

So when they return, they can Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Radnegone
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19
🚨︎ report
On what side of the cargo ship do they load all the USB charging cables?

The Port side.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GotMyOrangeCrush
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31
🚨︎ report
Tragic news, a cargo ship carrying shoes from overseas ran into heavy weather and sank, only one man was rescued, he was found using shoes as a makeshift flotation device.

He was the sole survivor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GotMyOrangeCrush
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04
🚨︎ report
How does Sir Lancelot ship his armor to the jousting tournament?

U.S. Mail Over Knight Express

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09
🚨︎ report
Denmark, Norway, and Sweden just implemented bar codes on all their military ships.

That way, whenever one of them comes into port, they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/movieguy2004
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?

Its so they can scan-de-navien

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πŸ‘€︎ u/InnTheAbyss
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24
🚨︎ report
So the Norwegian Navy is painting their ships with a bar code pattern

So when then come into port, they can Scandanavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ouyin2000
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03
🚨︎ report
That fellow in that steam rocket ship…

He is the flattest Earther

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Irv-Elephant
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24
🚨︎ report
Why do Norwegian ships have barcodes on them?

So when they come in to port, they can scan the navy in. (Scandinavian)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/krispyk84
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does Norway's navy have bar codes on the sides of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brizzo7
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08
🚨︎ report
How did they punish the longshoreman whose improper ship mooring caused the destruction of a pier?

They docked his pay.

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
🚨︎ report
I ship it
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Athena123YT
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bringojackprot
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16
🚨︎ report
You hear about the sinking ship that emerged in sea?

Yeah, it was a huge emerge-in-sea.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/oiggemini
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21
🚨︎ report
A "helen" could be used as a measurement of beauty, defined as a face that could launch a thousand ships. However, one should not use a "millihelen" to mean that a face could only launch one ship...

...because you shouldn't put metric prefixes on Troy units.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IncompotentCyborg
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Red ship hits Blue ship...

Sailors marooned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rocknocker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do pirates always end up buying the Jolly Roger for their ships instead of choosing other designs?

It’s the only one that’s always on sail....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sethbacca
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2019
🚨︎ report
My town finally decided to tear down the dilapidated replica of a pirate ship...

It was an aye-sore.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12
🚨︎ report
Why do Noweigians put bar codes on their ships?

For when they need to Scandinavian.

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Amphibatron
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the Swedish navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

So they can Scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 76
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GymLadJack
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
🚨︎ report
A guy starts working at a submarine. In the first day he works as a cleaner, then helps at the kitchen. Next day he runs the ship. In the evening he’s absolutely exhausted so he asks his friend β€œWhy I have to change my position every time?”

He replies β€œI know, this sub is full of reposts”

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2019
🚨︎ report
That's what I call a scholar ship
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SleepyWordsmith
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2019
🚨︎ report
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes

There’s a disturbance in the Norse

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_solidwarp_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
Ad by a Scandinavia cruise ship
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do all of Norway’s ships have bar codes?

So they can Scandinavian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/n3rf_h3rd3r
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I just read that the Carnival cruise ship "Glory" crashed into the Carnival cruise ship "Legend"

It left a legendary glory hull

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TimeRocker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
The Norwegian Navy added bar codes to their ships.

That way, when they dock, they can just Scan-da-navy-in.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stratospher
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you know someone who can fit all the animals in a ship?

I noah guy

πŸ‘︎ 75
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paoerfuuul
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
🚨︎ report
The Mandalorian is showing Baby Yoda around his ships.

They enter the fitness room and The Mandalorian flips a switch revealing a hidden compartment full of protein drinks.

"This is the whey."

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dwarvenfriend
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
The bartender asked the pirate, "Is that a ship's wheel sticking out if your pants?"

The pirate replied"Aye! It's driving me nuts!"

πŸ‘︎ 108
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MagicGuy66
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
🚨︎ report
What is the best kind of joke to tell on a cruise ship?

A one liner.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Joesdad65
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Watched a TV show about how they build ships.

It was riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PringyUK
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does Norway put barcodes on their ships?

So they can scan-di-navian

πŸ‘︎ 437
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What do sailors buy to customise the back of their ships?

Aft-ermarket parts!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/42undead2
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw a pirate walking down the street with a ship wheel stuffed in his pants. I said..."Hey, pirate...is that a ship wheel in your pants?" He said...

aye, matey it's driving me nuts!

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theposshow
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the whale find on the sunken logging ship?

A plank-ton

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pikkl_rikk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend has been having the hardest time getting pool noodles air frieighted in. Last night, he said he's going to have them sent on a container ship...

I said, "whatever boats your float."

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
🚨︎ report
My ship was sailing North but then it suddenly veered West and hit another ship...

It was an occident, I swear!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gssn-nospace
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do the Norway navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/charliealphazulu
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21
🚨︎ report
Why do the Norwegian Navy have barcodes on all their ships?

So when they come back to port, they can... Scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rjaramillo96
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeopardusMaximus
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian.

πŸ‘︎ 767
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jbizzlebev
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together

Riveting!

πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/amiur
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?

So when the come back to port they can Scandinavian.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrClapCheeks
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
🚨︎ report

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