Hickory Dickory Dock; the mouse ran up the clock. The clock struck 1

The others escaped with minor injuries.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThisFatGirlRuns
πŸ“…︎ May 14
🚨︎ report
The FAA has issued new guidelines on speed for airplanes to dock and passengers to board the plane.

The speeds for both are now known as "terminal velocity".

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ May 11
🚨︎ report
What did the pirate call his girlfriend at the dock?

Land Ho!

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/centstwo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11
🚨︎ report
Why can't the lake have two docks?

Because it would be a paradox.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bingomzan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14
🚨︎ report
I was a DJ performing at a fishing dock

You should've seen it when I dropped the bass

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fr1ckreddit420
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20
🚨︎ report
The best part of building docks?

Working with my piers.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedPlanetCorridor
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05
🚨︎ report
My friends invited me to do drugs on the docks

The Pier pressure is heavy

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Waterburst789
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
🚨︎ report
Old boat docks never die…

They just disa-pier.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
🚨︎ report
My friend keeps asking me if I’ll help him build a dock behind his lake house, even though I keep telling him β€œno.”

Honestly, I’m feeling a lot of pier pressure.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tvkyle
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
The other day I was on the dock talking to two of my neighbors… One of them had a cooler full of beers and snacks… Pulling out a beer pops the top and opening a bag of chips, he says β€œMy wife’s an angel

I said, β€œyou’re lucky – mine is still alive…”

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hayeshilton
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Found out my son jumped the water by the docks

He was pier pressured.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/battebatmand
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I was at the lake, and I had a really bad feeling about the dock.

It was foreboding.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lankyjay16
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do boats never go to sleep after they leave the dock?

Because they leave a wake.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Logun30
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the magician insult the dock?

He wanted to diss a pier

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/steve_ideas
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I never wanted to go to the docks, but after my friends pestered me for an hour I finally gave into pier pressure
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Bandit_TFR
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2019
🚨︎ report
My inflatable dock burst after my friends kept telling me to fill it with more air.

Too much pier pressure.

πŸ‘︎ 92
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
It's a pair-a-docks
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chris103103
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
🚨︎ report
I took my boat out to go fishing today. I looked over and saw my neighbor’s dock was parallel to mine.

I guess I found my self in a real β€œpara-docks”

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tacobob3831
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Hickory dickory dock, three mice ran up the clock.

The clock struck one.....the others escaped with minor injuries.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hmoney720
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I just witnessed a bride walk down the isle to the song "dock of a bay"

It was an Otis wedding.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brosthetic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the sunken dock feel anxious?

It was under pier pressure

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CCCoolbucket
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Working as a dock hand is hard,

but it's wharf it.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/totally80s
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you know if a dock has good morals?

It doesn’t succumb to pier pressure.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mikeywebs
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend sailed his yacht into the wharf very rapidly, crashing into the dock and causing a dent in the hull...

It's just a berth mark, he swears.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
🚨︎ report
The state passed a new regulation that you can only have one dock at a boat landing.

Because if you had two it would be a paradox.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrmunkey
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the dock cave in?

pier pressure

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/reachingnexus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did the Dock go for advice?

Pier counseling.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gigler198
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Someone pushed me off a dock today for singing poorly.

I guess I was off quay.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Godredd
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does a dock master check wander out onto the docks? To be amongst his piers.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trajanman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2018
🚨︎ report
An escaped prisoner was captured down at the docks.

They were harboring a fugitive.

πŸ‘︎ 374
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRtHonLaqueesha
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2016
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the helmsman who crashed his boat at the dock?

He had an accident at berth.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/itsthearistocrat
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2018
🚨︎ report
Why didn’t the boat dock?

Too much Pier Pressure

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ChingChongMan123
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2018
🚨︎ report
How do you ensure a dock gets a fair trial?

Have it decided by a jury of his piers

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ServalSpots
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the dock that collapsed during Hurricane Sandy?

It experienced pier pressure.

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wyboth
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2013
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the study done about boat docks? reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a small insect which lived at the docks that's being shipped to another country because it is no longer important?

An export-ant.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WheresTheWombo
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2017
🚨︎ report
Where does a stock broker dock their boat?

Port folio.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/x5685
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2017
🚨︎ report
What did the fisherman do when he needed to borrow a boat from another dock?

He took out a pier to pier loan.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Domthehuman1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2017
🚨︎ report
If you only have one dock, so you go back in time to build yourself another dock, what do you have?

A paradox.

If you freeze it, then it's paradoxicle

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/witz33
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2016
🚨︎ report
So there's this half-man, half-frog looking thing that lives under the docks...

He's a portmantoad.

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OK_Compooper
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2016
🚨︎ report
If a boat is on trial for crashing into a dock...

...does it get a jury of its piers? Because that seems a little unfair

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kleinyman
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2015
🚨︎ report
Hickory dickory dock, three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck one...

...and the other two escaped with minor injuries.

πŸ‘︎ 276
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Villainero
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Why didn't the boat dock?

Too much pier pressure..

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dadushka008
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2018
🚨︎ report

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