The skipper of a 40 ton trawler which ran aground in Hull during the early hours of Sunday was reported to be 6 times over the legal limit for sailing. Authorities said they had no idea what to do with a drunken sailor early in the morning.
πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/S0n0fRuss
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
🚨︎ report
After eating da ship, da sea monster said, Me can’t believe Me ate da hull fing.
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Somebody get the Captain! There’s been a hull breach! We’re going down!

Oh sorry, wrong sub

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Roku-Hanmar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do Swedish warships have barcodes painted on their hulls?

So that when they return to port, the authorities can Scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lt_PeteMitchell1
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that the Swedes have started putting barcodes on the hulls of their warships?

Now, when they pull into port, they can Scandinavian.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EngineersAnon
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm reading a book about a sadistic evil man who attaches ridges from boat hulls to his victims...

He's a mad keeler!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend sailed his yacht into the wharf very rapidly, crashing into the dock and causing a dent in the hull...

It's just a berth mark, he swears.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
🚨︎ report
That book about ship hull construction was

Riveting!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
🚨︎ report
I bought a boat half price...

It was on sail.

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
🚨︎ report
We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I've started a business making boats in my attic...

Sails are going through the roof.

πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dcsco
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2017
🚨︎ report
I just read that the Carnival cruise ship "Glory" crashed into the Carnival cruise ship "Legend"

It left a legendary glory hull

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TimeRocker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
[Request] Nautical puns!

Sexually suggestive and/or light hearted and clean!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/American_Standard
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2015
🚨︎ report
My favorite Dad Joke recently

Why do Norwegian military boats and submarines have bar codes on their hulls?

Two answers:

So they can make sure they can a fjord them

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wealthedge
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
🚨︎ report
My son just bought a 27-foot long canoe.

He told me it was really expensive because its material, kevlar, its seats, leather, and the hull, 9 yards.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Catapult_Power
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Neighbor: hey, would it be alright if I stored my boat in your yard?

It's a Civil War era iron-hulled gunboat. Would that be too much of a burden?

Me: I wouldn't call it a burden. More like a hardship.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/YoureAMuenster
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2019
🚨︎ report
The old man and the sea?

He was Hemingway out of his mind when that sick hull stole his bread.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/twinValleys
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2015
🚨︎ report
Sailboat dadjoke

Uncle: I just have to paint the sailboat before we can get it back in the water. Dad: Wow, that sounds like a hull of a lot of work...Get it? GET IT?!

He was very proud of that one.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Frinion
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2014
🚨︎ report
A giant list of puns from r/copypasta

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
After eating the ship, the sea monster said,

I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
🚨︎ report
514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 78
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Josvys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report
After eating the ship, the sea monster said,

I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the new Aladdin movie staring on a ship?

I heard it's in a hull, new world!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gigler198
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.