Moldova named the biggest mall in its capital malldova
What’s the difference between a mall and a parked car?
Old shopping malls never die…
They just get de-mall-ished.
What did the tree say when it ran into the mall?
Tina? Larry? Where is everybody?!? Oh my god, they’re all gone!!! ... Oooh a sale!
I once saw a woman punch a Mall Santa in the face.
But he did call her a "ho" like three times.
I tried to quell a disagreement between me and my girlfriend in the shopping mall. But by the time we got to the second level we were shouting at each other.
In retrospect we shouldn’t have been on that escalator.
Why did the city support the music hall being repurposed as a shopping mall?
I work at the mall as Santa Claus during Christmas. I'm wearing the costume for most of the day, but sometimes my colleague takes my place while I take a break
I'm the main Claus and he's my subordinate Claus.
I was going to buy my kid this winter coat we saw at the mall, but I couldn't afford it.
First child born in a couple of weeks so I thought to give it the good ol try. Sometimes when I’m down I go to the mall and use the elevator.
So it can lift me up and make my day better.
I tried to OC.
How do people lose their kids in a mall?
Seriously, any tips are welcome.
I went to an outdoor mall today and there was guy misting water at people as they walked by. My wife quickly avoided him.
Mister mister missed her.
I bad to punch the mall Santa in the face...
He called my daughter a 'ho'! 3 times!!!
There’s was a kidnapping in the mall yesterday!
He woke up.
(A true classic)
My balding grandfather told me that there was an adept wigmaker at the mall.
The wigmaker offered me a good deal that I was willing toupee for.
What was the pianist doing at the mall?
Well I was doing speedy shopping, until I stopped and had hat to break to see this. Quality puns at the mall.
You know, if you have seen one collection of retail outlets under one roof, you have seen a mall.
This bike stand outside my local mall
There's a big space at the local mall where they're going to build a Starbucks. I suppose that space is now officially
So I know of this mall that uses animal employees...
I was walking along the food court when I saw this one animal that was incredibly overdressed compared to the others. While most where in their uniform, this one was in a red and gold robe, and was strangely being followed by a bunch of Buddhist monks.
I asked one of the customers if it was an Alpaca Packer.
They said no.
It's the Deli Llama.
My brother had an interview for a mall Santa in another town. His GPS led him astray and he missed it.
I think he was a lost Clause to begin with.
I met Darth Vader’s wife at the mall yesterday.
Nice gal, her name’s Ella.
Why is "the mall" called "the mall?"
Because you don't just shop at one store, you shop at THEM-ALL
Have you seen the mall?
No, but I've seen most of 'em.
(My father used this one every time we passed an enclosed shopping center. I wanted to die.)
A teenager's car won't start out at the mall one night
He tries everything he knows to do, but finally calls his father for help.
Mom and Dad come up to mall parking lot, dad gets into the car, turns the key once, and the engine roars to life.
The teenager is shocked at how easy it was.
"Dad! What did you do differently? I tried everything!"
"It was easy son. I'm wearing my cargo shorts."
They said a killer was on the loose in the mall
I went to hide in the watch store to buy me some time
My eye doctor’s office is at the shopping mall.
My 3 year old got scared of the mall Santa. I guess he’s claustrophobic like his old man
My daughters asked me when we were going to the upper level of the mall.
I told them we had choices. We could esca-now, or escalator.
Visiting Minnesota, family wanted to visit the Mall of America
“Ehh, you’ve been to one, you’ve been to the mall”
I heard someone stole a Shaggy CD from the mall
Walking through the mall with my 9 yr old and a kiosk saleswoman waves a sample of lotion and asks 'A gift for your daughter?'
I said 'No, thank you' and then looked down at my daughter and said 'Can you believe she thought I'd trade you away for just a tiny bit of lotion? I'd need a whole bottle, at least!'
She thought that was pretty funny.
What do you call it when you eat at a mall and you're satisfied by your meal?
There's a lady at the mall that does clothing alterations in less than 2 hours.
Her name is Tailor Swift.
I was at the mall the other day...
I was at the mall the other day and saw this gentleman sitting outside a store with a stack of flyers. He asked another me as I walked by, “Excuse me sir, would you like a flyer?” I looked down and replied, “Yea bro, sure.”
Whoever called the loops in malls with restaurants "food courts" missed a huge opportunity. They ought to be cul-de-snacks.
A blind guy enters the mall.
He takes his seeing eye dog and starts swinging it,round and round.I asked him,"Hey buddy,what are you doing to that poor dog?"
He says,"Just taking a look around."
Where does Darth Vader get his clothes? The Darth Mall.
If they were to create a shopping plaza for bees, it would be a bzz mall.
I saw Santa following me around in the mall, and I asked him why.
He said, “Christmas stalking.”
Yesterday I was supposed to get 2 dollars and 50 cents after my transaction at the mall but only got 2 dollars
It doesn’t make any cents
True Story: I was driving my family to my son's birthday party at one of those trampoline places. While looking for it in the strip mall...
We passed an IHOP, to which I stated "There it is!"
Saw a sign at a mall kiosk recently; "Watch Batteries Installed, $5"
Couldn't help but wonder why anyone would pay to see that.
How do people lose their kids in a mall?
Seriously, any tips are welcome.
How do people lose their kids in a mall?
Seriously, I need some pointers.
How do parents lose their kids in a mall?!
Seriously. Any tips welcome.
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