Moldova named the biggest mall in its capital malldova
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jujumusk
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25
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What’s the difference between a mall and a parked car?

A lot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jupitersmoones
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12
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Old shopping malls never die…

They just get de-mall-ished.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
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What did the tree say when it ran into the mall?

Tina? Larry? Where is everybody?!? Oh my god, they’re all gone!!! ... Oooh a sale!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JumpinJaccFlash
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
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I once saw a woman punch a Mall Santa in the face.

But he did call her a "ho" like three times.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Picker-Rick
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
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I tried to quell a disagreement between me and my girlfriend in the shopping mall. But by the time we got to the second level we were shouting at each other.

In retrospect we shouldn’t have been on that escalator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sellwinerugs
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
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Why did the city support the music hall being repurposed as a shopping mall?

Harmonic Re-zone-ance

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
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I work at the mall as Santa Claus during Christmas. I'm wearing the costume for most of the day, but sometimes my colleague takes my place while I take a break

I'm the main Claus and he's my subordinate Claus.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MokshK
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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I was going to buy my kid this winter coat we saw at the mall, but I couldn't afford it.

So I had to jacket.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iLL_Motives
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
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First child born in a couple of weeks so I thought to give it the good ol try. Sometimes when I’m down I go to the mall and use the elevator.

So it can lift me up and make my day better.

I tried to OC.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnpowers99
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
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How do people lose their kids in a mall?

Seriously, any tips are welcome.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Safazz146
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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I went to an outdoor mall today and there was guy misting water at people as they walked by. My wife quickly avoided him.

Mister mister missed her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zedhead0628
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2020
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I bad to punch the mall Santa in the face...

He called my daughter a 'ho'! 3 times!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirDrew007
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
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There’s was a kidnapping in the mall yesterday!

He woke up.

(A true classic)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinnishAmerican
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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My balding grandfather told me that there was an adept wigmaker at the mall.

The wigmaker offered me a good deal that I was willing toupee for.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WatchOutItsAdam
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
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What was the pianist doing at the mall?

Chopin

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sajinib
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
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Well I was doing speedy shopping, until I stopped and had hat to break to see this. Quality puns at the mall.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/satire_scull
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2020
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You know, if you have seen one collection of retail outlets under one roof, you have seen a mall.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/heavyduty1930
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2020
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This bike stand outside my local mall
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KulgyHD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2018
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There's a big space at the local mall where they're going to build a Starbucks. I suppose that space is now officially

the coffee grounds.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ralph3576
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2020
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So I know of this mall that uses animal employees...

I was walking along the food court when I saw this one animal that was incredibly overdressed compared to the others. While most where in their uniform, this one was in a red and gold robe, and was strangely being followed by a bunch of Buddhist monks.

I asked one of the customers if it was an Alpaca Packer.

They said no.

It's the Deli Llama.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wolfyfancylads
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
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My brother had an interview for a mall Santa in another town. His GPS led him astray and he missed it.

I think he was a lost Clause to begin with.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2020
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I met Darth Vader’s wife at the mall yesterday.

Nice gal, her name’s Ella.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tanko89
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2019
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Why is "the mall" called "the mall?"

Because you don't just shop at one store, you shop at THEM-ALL

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sa1nt_nick
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2018
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Have you seen the mall?

No, but I've seen most of 'em.

(My father used this one every time we passed an enclosed shopping center. I wanted to die.)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EvilGreebo
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
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A teenager's car won't start out at the mall one night

He tries everything he knows to do, but finally calls his father for help.

Mom and Dad come up to mall parking lot, dad gets into the car, turns the key once, and the engine roars to life.

The teenager is shocked at how easy it was.

"Dad! What did you do differently? I tried everything!"

"It was easy son. I'm wearing my cargo shorts."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ezra611
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
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They said a killer was on the loose in the mall

I went to hide in the watch store to buy me some time

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πŸ‘€︎ u/justanothershady
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
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My eye doctor’s office is at the shopping mall.

She’s an Opthemallogist

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
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My 3 year old got scared of the mall Santa. I guess he’s claustrophobic like his old man
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PLUMBUM2
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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One liner to rule the mall reddit.com/r/Showerthough…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ursppachulli
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
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My daughters asked me when we were going to the upper level of the mall.

I told them we had choices. We could esca-now, or escalator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quibblicous
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2019
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Visiting Minnesota, family wanted to visit the Mall of America

β€œEhh, you’ve been to one, you’ve been to the mall”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarkSoulsIdiot
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2019
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I heard someone stole a Shaggy CD from the mall

Wasn't me

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πŸ‘€︎ u/almondjoyeee
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2019
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Walking through the mall with my 9 yr old and a kiosk saleswoman waves a sample of lotion and asks 'A gift for your daughter?'

I said 'No, thank you' and then looked down at my daughter and said 'Can you believe she thought I'd trade you away for just a tiny bit of lotion? I'd need a whole bottle, at least!'

She thought that was pretty funny.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nocatsonmelmac
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2019
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What do you call it when you eat at a mall and you're satisfied by your meal?

Mallnourished

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shrewy211
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
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There's a lady at the mall that does clothing alterations in less than 2 hours.

Her name is Tailor Swift.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
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I was at the mall the other day...

I was at the mall the other day and saw this gentleman sitting outside a store with a stack of flyers. He asked another me as I walked by, β€œExcuse me sir, would you like a flyer?” I looked down and replied, β€œYea bro, sure.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDeadlyGent
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2019
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Whoever called the loops in malls with restaurants "food courts" missed a huge opportunity. They ought to be cul-de-snacks.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Batshit_Betty
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2018
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A blind guy enters the mall.

He takes his seeing eye dog and starts swinging it,round and round.I asked him,"Hey buddy,what are you doing to that poor dog?"

He says,"Just taking a look around."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2019
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Where does Darth Vader get his clothes? The Darth Mall.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The--User
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2019
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How do people lose their kids in a mall?

Seriously, I need some pointers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
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How do parents lose their kids in a mall?!

Seriously. Any tips welcome.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RileighR
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2018
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If they were to create a shopping plaza for bees, it would be a bzz mall.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fortifier22
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
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I saw Santa following me around in the mall, and I asked him why.

He said, β€œChristmas stalking.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2018
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Yesterday I was supposed to get 2 dollars and 50 cents after my transaction at the mall but only got 2 dollars

It doesn’t make any cents

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πŸ‘€︎ u/loclink
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
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True Story: I was driving my family to my son's birthday party at one of those trampoline places. While looking for it in the strip mall...

We passed an IHOP, to which I stated "There it is!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pikeben08
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2019
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Saw a sign at a mall kiosk recently; "Watch Batteries Installed, $5"

Couldn't help but wonder why anyone would pay to see that.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2019
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How do people lose their kids in a mall?

Seriously, any tips are welcome.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2018
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