Have you heard the joke about the capital building?

It's a riot

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cbt711
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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What do you call a bunch of racist red necks storming the Capitol Building?

The Coup Klux Klan

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RobMV03
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08
🚨︎ report
Good thing there are just the two doors to the US Capitol building

Cause attempted sedan doesn’t have the same ring to it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zeugirdork
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
🚨︎ report
What does a person who is turned on by tall buildings have?

An edifice complex.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Big_Toe_Bro
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
🚨︎ report
A favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandpa...

Until my mom hid the urn from me.

πŸ‘︎ 240
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife just completed a 40 week body building program this morning

It's a girl and weighs 7lbs 12 oz.

πŸ‘︎ 40k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StuntsMonkey
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
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what did the depressed water park attendant think of at the top of a high rise building?

I wanna commit suislide

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GLIZZYGOD999
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a problem with over-engineered large buildings.

It's a complex complex complex.

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the police officer say when she caught a man peeing on the side of a building?

Urine big trouble mister!

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TitanPhoebs
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the toilet paper jump of the building?

To quickly get to the bottom...

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
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What happened to the men who smashed all the windows in their office building..

They're now facing a glass action lawsuit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AEvans1888
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
What building has the most stories?

The library. (Daughter dropped this on me yesterday. So proud!)

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Make_it_perfect
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Recently, I’ve been building a car made from old washing machine parts

I’m going to take it out a spin tomorrow

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/justbeatitTTD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?

Of course it can! A building can’t jump at all!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GoodChadAndUgly
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Officer : Sir, Ma’am, I’m afraid your child was responsible for burning the building.

Dad : You mean our son?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KIT-3
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Two blondes walk into a building

You’d have thought one of them would have seen it...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThaCrimsonChinn
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm pretty bad at building fences..

Oops, wrong place for this post

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
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my wife just completed a 40 week body building program this morning.

she's worked very hard and i know it's been difficult for her, but i'm very proud. she's in possibly the best shape of her life and she is once again confident in her own body, but i will endlessly love her despite what she looks like.

what, were you expecting me to say something about a baby?

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the yoga instructor say when he was asked to leave the building?

Nah I’ma stay.

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
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What do you call it when you throw a middle aged woman off a building and they come back to you?

A boomerang

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blueandgoldilocks
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Who's the jedi that fell off of a building?

Panikin Skywalker

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shaunEll
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that they're building a new trampoline park in Beijing?

It's called Xi Jum'ping.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dumbwaeguk
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife just finished her 40 week body building program.

She lost 8 pounds and 1 oz, and gained a new family member!

I'm officially a father and step father! Woohoo!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/InsaneVanity
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call an important message to the staff of a building materials company?

An announcement

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Chinese are building all sorts of new educational camps with invigorating physical exercise for Uigher citizens.

It's all fun and games until someone loses an ideology.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/urlordcov
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Whats the kinkiest religious building called?

The MOANastery

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SendMeNoodPics
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a fear of overly intricate buildings.

I have a complex complex complex.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheIndrajitKar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
A paper airplane went down from a 2 story building

I guess it went down a flight of stairs.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_K_Tran
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I recently opened a building with an exhibition of dermatological skin cases.

It’s a real gallery of the fine warts.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/C0NSTABEL
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a chicken who sits on top of a building?

A roofster!

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
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The female janitor in my building asked if I would smoke some weed with her.

I said no; I can't deal with high maintenance women.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Indigo_Samurott
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried building a ski resort

It was a slippery slope

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thunderfighter6
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the saddest component of a building?

The weep holes

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kha1i1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to see a demonstration on steel boat building.

It was riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/McveigshArk
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad are we the ones who burned down the building?

Yes we arson

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ser_jaime358
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
They said constructing viagras office building to be shaped like a penis would be difficult

But I didn’t expect it to be that hard

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Paradigm_Shiftz
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Can you believe that Boeing is going to start building planes out of cardboard to save money?!

We can’t just let things like this fly!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/i_post_gibberish
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
🚨︎ report
You ever hear that joke about the tall building?

Actually, nevermind long story.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rslashhuman
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
🚨︎ report
After the contractor did a poor job installing the moving stairs in our office building my boss threw him down the steps.

That escalated quickly.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/diceblue
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
For the last two weeks my kids have been building a medieval blanket fort every evening to sleep in. Many nights they also stayed up past their bedtime playing fortnight under its protective cover.

It was a night knight fort for Fortnight for a fortnight.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/graceful_ox
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
When Adobe decides to finally end Flash Player, they’ll actually be building something new!

They’ll be breaking newgrounds!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dougmantis
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
My favorite hobby as a kid was building sandcastles with my grandpa

...until my mom hid the urn from me.

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Valdagast
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I have an irrational fear of overly engineered buildings

I have a complex complex complex

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thesabermaniac
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ve got a phobia of over-engineered buildings.

It’s a complex complex complex.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/randomredditor512
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a fear of overly complicated buildings

I have a complex complex complex

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thenoblegoose
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report

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