My father was disappointed when I told him I would be helping construct and pave a cul-de-sac.
      He told me it was a dead-end job.
        π︎ 12
         
        
        
        π
︎ Feb 16 2019
        
       
      
     
      Wanna hear a joke about construction?
      ... im still working on it
        π︎ 96
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 14 2021
        
       
      
     
      I would like to say a joke on construction
      
      
        π︎ 11
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 18 2021
        
       
      
     
      Construction workers don't have side chicks
      
      
        π︎ 44
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 26 2021
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      REQUEST : Need help with a punny (sorry) construction site related safety slogan
      I have to make a slogan for safety week at a construction site I work at. Can you guys help?
        π︎ 3
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 08 2021
        
       
      
     
      My two sons 5&8 are playing Minecraft this morning on survival. They are working hard together to build their mansion. I crossed the room in front of the TV to grab my phone as they are balanced high on a wall constructing a roof. My son screams out, βDad get out of the way!β
      I said, βYouβre the ones blocking!β
        π︎ 16k
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 27 2020
        
       
      
     
      Working on a home construction project and felt like relaxing with drink. Of course it's unsafe to mix alcohol with power tools.
      Which is why I mixed my drink with a spoon instead.
        π︎ 13
         
        
        
        π
︎ Feb 05 2021
        
       
      
     
      Whatβs a construction workers favorite song?
      
      
        π︎ 6
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 12 2021
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      I have a joke about construction...
      But Iβm still working on it.
Happy Cake Day to me.
Hope yβall have a great day!
        π︎ 5
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 13 2020
        
       
      
     
      You can always give punk rock bands constructive criticism...
      They appreciate feedback.
        π︎ 12
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 10 2020
        
       
      
     
      They said constructing viagras office building to be shaped like a penis would be difficult
      But I didnβt expect it to be that hard
        π︎ 14
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jul 20 2020
        
       
      
     
      Homegrown dad joke
      I was driving from Tennessee to North Carolina the other day and right after I crossed over the Eastern Continental Divide, there was some road construction. A sign there said, "Fines Higher" and I thought to myself, "Huh. Probably because of the elevation."
Then I was disappointed because I was by myself and there was nobody there to tell.
        π︎ 21
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 11 2021
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Police report says someone was stealing rockwool from a construction site downtown.
      Turns out it was an isolated incident.
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
        π
︎ Sep 22 2020
        
       
      
     
      I was having an argument about construction with someone on reddit.
      He said he never had any issues with mis-calculations during construction on houses and I said that's impossible.
I told him in response about a time I put a post in the ground at a bad angle and had to take it out and put it back in correctly.
He got mad at me because he had heard the same exact story on r/construction
I guess you could call it a repost
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
        π
︎ Sep 22 2020
        
       
      
     
      A construction worker goes to a fancy restaurant and his a dress code problem.
      The man goes into the fancy restaurant and have a discussion with the host:
Host Sir, you cannot come in here with out a belt. We have standards.
The man goes out to his car and puts on a belt fashioned out of some rope. He goes back in.
Host Alright.... I guess you have a belt....You still need a jacket.
The man goes back out to his car and fishes out a jacket his wore to a wedding a year ago. He shares it off, brushes it with his hand, and puts it on.
Host Ok. You still need a tie. It is required.
The man goes out to his car. He doesn't have a tie. He puts on jumper cables and makes a perfect Windsor knot.
Host You have a belt and a jacket. I guess you have a tie.
Just don't try to start something....
        π︎ 3
         
        
        
        π
︎ Sep 16 2020
        
       
      
     
      Soon just got me without this one: "Hey Dad, want to hear a construction joke?"
      Give me a second I'm still working on it.
        π︎ 7k
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 23 2018
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      If plumbers have plumbers crack what do construction workers have?
      Asphalt
(My dads been telling this one since I was 12, never heard it anywhere else π)
        π︎ 21
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 09 2020
        
       
      
     
      I didn't know my dad stole from construction sites, but...
      When I got home, all the signs were there
        π︎ 15
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 15 2020
        
       
      
     
      Would you like to hear a construction joke?
      [Yes]Β  Well Iβm still working on it.
        π︎ 9
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 27 2020
        
       
      
     
      Did you hear about the near sighted construction worker who lost his glasses?
      He really fell into his work.
        π︎ 2
         
        
        
        π
︎ Aug 26 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      The project to restore Big Ben was a bit behind schedule, so the construction company put on a third shift...
      Men are now working around the clock.
        π︎ 8
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jul 19 2020
        
       
      
     
      The sporting goods store downtown was having a big sale on canoe paddles, but traffic and road construction made it real pain to get there...
      ...yeah, it was quite the ordeal to get the oar deal.
        π︎ 2
         
        
        
        π
︎ Aug 08 2020
        
       
      
     
      Big Ben Currently Under Construction (From r/funny)
      
      
        π︎ 31
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 08 2020
        
       
      
     
      I watched a show about construction
      
      
        π︎ 11
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 23 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Did you hear about the new dating site that matches women up with construction workers?
      
      
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 05 2020
        
       
      
     
      How does construction workers party ?
      
      
        π︎ 5
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 23 2020
        
       
      
     
      Construction Dadjoke: Our Sewage Treatment Plant supplier is missing
      In his last email he said "I remain at your disposal for any concerns".
Couldn't find him there this morning. I hope he's ok.
        π︎ 5
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 07 2020
        
       
      
     
      I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
      But when I got home, all the signs were there.
        π︎ 52
         
        
        
        π
︎ Nov 21 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      For the past few days, I wake up to see someone has dumped a bunch of LEGO blocks on my front porch.
      I donβt know what to make of it.
        π︎ 9k
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 04 2020
        
       
      
     
      I was helping my dad with construction he told me to get the hammer but I accidentally gave him the drill
      He said I could have nailed it, but I screwed up
        π︎ 74
         
        
        
        π
︎ Sep 02 2019
        
       
      
     
      First post
      
      
        π︎ 43
         
        
        
        π
︎ Oct 14 2020
        
       
      
     
      The pharaoh promised workers they would be rich if they bought into his MLM construction plan.
      It was the very first pyramid scheme.
        π︎ 14
         
        
        
        π
︎ Feb 23 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Want to hear a joke about construction?
      
      
        π︎ 59
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 13 2021
        
       
      
     
      I was going to tell a construction joke
      But Iβm still working on it
        π︎ 15
         
        
        
        π
︎ Feb 21 2021
        
       
      
     
      Wanna hear a construction joke?
      Iβm still working on it...
        π︎ 15
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 16 2021
        
       
      
     
      I have a joke about construction
      I would tell you but Iβm still working on it
        π︎ 10
         
        
        
        π
︎ Dec 14 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      I've got a great joke about construction,
      But I'm still working on it
        π︎ 2
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 04 2021
        
       
      
     
      Do you wanna hear a joke about construction
      Never mind Iβm still working on it
        π︎ 9
         
        
        
        π
︎ Nov 30 2020
        
       
      
     
      Want to hear a joke about construction?
      
      
        π︎ 8
         
        
        
        π
︎ Sep 12 2020
        
       
      
     
      You wanna hear a joke about construction
      Nevermind I'm still working on it.
        π︎ 9
         
        
        
        π
︎ May 14 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      I've got a great joke about construction
      but I'm still working on it
        π︎ 16
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 18 2020
        
       
      
     
      Have you heard the joke about construction?
      Ah, I'm still working on it.
        π︎ 22
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 16 2020
        
       
      
     
      I have a joke about construction.
      
      
        π︎ 16
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 07 2020
        
       
      
     
      Want to hear a joke about Construction?
      
      
        π︎ 51
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 30 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Want to hear a construction joke?
      Sorry I am still working on it
        π︎ 23
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 18 2020
        
       
      
     
      Want to hear a joke about construction?
      I'm still working on it...
        π︎ 34
         
        
        
        π
︎ Apr 13 2020
        
       
      
     
      I've got a great joke about construction
      But I'm still working on it
        π︎ 20
         
        
        
        π
︎ Oct 30 2019
        
       
      
     
      Wanna hear a joke about construction?
      Wait, Iβm still working on it.
        π︎ 169
         
        
        
        π
︎ Feb 01 2019
        
       
      
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