My father was disappointed when I told him I would be helping construct and pave a cul-de-sac.

He told me it was a dead-end job.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Roivas14
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Wanna hear a joke about construction?

... im still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 96
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πŸ‘€︎ u/festivalheadmmsk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2021
🚨︎ report
I would like to say a joke on construction

But I am working on it

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Construction workers don't have side chicks

They have Back Hoes

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yatzhie04
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
🚨︎ report
REQUEST : Need help with a punny (sorry) construction site related safety slogan

I have to make a slogan for safety week at a construction site I work at. Can you guys help?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tehas19
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
🚨︎ report
My two sons 5&8 are playing Minecraft this morning on survival. They are working hard together to build their mansion. I crossed the room in front of the TV to grab my phone as they are balanced high on a wall constructing a roof. My son screams out, β€œDad get out of the way!”

I said, β€œYou’re the ones blocking!”

πŸ‘︎ 16k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Colbosky
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Working on a home construction project and felt like relaxing with drink. Of course it's unsafe to mix alcohol with power tools.

Which is why I mixed my drink with a spoon instead.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BetterThanOP
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s a construction workers favorite song?

Running With The Level!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LegendaryBroku
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2021
🚨︎ report
I have a joke about construction...

But I’m still working on it.

Happy Cake Day to me. Hope y’all have a great day!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wardenclyffe5
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
🚨︎ report
You can always give punk rock bands constructive criticism...

They appreciate feedback.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/watercolorfiddle
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
They said constructing viagras office building to be shaped like a penis would be difficult

But I didn’t expect it to be that hard

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Paradigm_Shiftz
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Homegrown dad joke

I was driving from Tennessee to North Carolina the other day and right after I crossed over the Eastern Continental Divide, there was some road construction. A sign there said, "Fines Higher" and I thought to myself, "Huh. Probably because of the elevation."

Then I was disappointed because I was by myself and there was nobody there to tell.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fullinversion82
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2021
🚨︎ report
Police report says someone was stealing rockwool from a construction site downtown.

Turns out it was an isolated incident.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Reddnvb
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I was having an argument about construction with someone on reddit.

He said he never had any issues with mis-calculations during construction on houses and I said that's impossible.

I told him in response about a time I put a post in the ground at a bad angle and had to take it out and put it back in correctly.

He got mad at me because he had heard the same exact story on r/construction

I guess you could call it a repost

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ReHawse
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
A construction worker goes to a fancy restaurant and his a dress code problem.

The man goes into the fancy restaurant and have a discussion with the host:

Host Sir, you cannot come in here with out a belt. We have standards.

The man goes out to his car and puts on a belt fashioned out of some rope. He goes back in.

Host Alright.... I guess you have a belt....You still need a jacket.

The man goes back out to his car and fishes out a jacket his wore to a wedding a year ago. He shares it off, brushes it with his hand, and puts it on.

Host Ok. You still need a tie. It is required.

The man goes out to his car. He doesn't have a tie. He puts on jumper cables and makes a perfect Windsor knot.

Host You have a belt and a jacket. I guess you have a tie.

Just don't try to start something....

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WinnieTheEeyore
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Soon just got me without this one: "Hey Dad, want to hear a construction joke?"

Give me a second I'm still working on it.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wheezy360
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
🚨︎ report
If plumbers have plumbers crack what do construction workers have?

Asphalt (My dads been telling this one since I was 12, never heard it anywhere else πŸ˜‚)

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MisterGriimm
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I didn't know my dad stole from construction sites, but...

When I got home, all the signs were there

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/studentadvisor101
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Would you like to hear a construction joke?

[Yes]Β  Well I’m still working on it.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theredditman111
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the near sighted construction worker who lost his glasses?

He really fell into his work.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lvrcerosis
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
🚨︎ report
The project to restore Big Ben was a bit behind schedule, so the construction company put on a third shift...

Men are now working around the clock.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
🚨︎ report
The sporting goods store downtown was having a big sale on canoe paddles, but traffic and road construction made it real pain to get there...

...yeah, it was quite the ordeal to get the oar deal.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Big Ben Currently Under Construction (From r/funny)
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I watched a show about construction

It was riveting

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Adorm_Snormp
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the new dating site that matches women up with construction workers?

It's called Studfinder.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VomitingPotato
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
🚨︎ report
How does construction workers party ?

They raise the roof.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/masprocas
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Construction Dadjoke: Our Sewage Treatment Plant supplier is missing

In his last email he said "I remain at your disposal for any concerns".

Couldn't find him there this morning. I hope he's ok.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andrei178
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.

But when I got home, all the signs were there.

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Papa_G_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
For the past few days, I wake up to see someone has dumped a bunch of LEGO blocks on my front porch.

I don’t know what to make of it.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
🚨︎ report
I was helping my dad with construction he told me to get the hammer but I accidentally gave him the drill

He said I could have nailed it, but I screwed up

πŸ‘︎ 74
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhoIsPharoah17
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
First post
πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
🚨︎ report
The pharaoh promised workers they would be rich if they bought into his MLM construction plan.

It was the very first pyramid scheme.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Supreme_Herb
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2021
🚨︎ report
I was going to tell a construction joke

But I’m still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nickatier_Carbs
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Wanna hear a construction joke?

I’m still working on it...

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/daddysbrat18
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
🚨︎ report
I have a joke about construction

I would tell you but I’m still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GLIZZYGOD999
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I've got a great joke about construction,

But I'm still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AxtonGTV
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Do you wanna hear a joke about construction

Never mind I’m still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AshamedTurtwig
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
You wanna hear a joke about construction

Nevermind I'm still working on it.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Julius1506
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I've got a great joke about construction

but I'm still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LucianoMercuri__
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Have you heard the joke about construction?

Ah, I'm still working on it.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wendru
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a joke about construction.

I'm working on it.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RebekhaG
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a joke about Construction?

I'm still working on it.

πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jojoboy389
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a construction joke?

Sorry I am still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yashrajt
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it...

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dani_SF
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I've got a great joke about construction

But I'm still working on it

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lacsantos91
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Wanna hear a joke about construction?

Wait, I’m still working on it.

πŸ‘︎ 169
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πŸ‘€︎ u/conditackler
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2019
🚨︎ report

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