The school phoned me today and said, "Your son's has been telling lies. "
I replied, "Tell him, he's bloody good. I don't have any kids."
What lies on the ocean floor twitching uncontrollably?
The nation of Iran lies between the ancient lands of Babylon to the west and the mountains of Afghanistan to the east...
In other words, it’s between Iraq and a hard place.
What lies on its back 100 ft in the air?
When Lil Uzi Vert lies down...
Does he call himself Lil Uzi Horizont?
What’s Orange and Lies Constantly?
An abandoned basketball, but I like where your head’s at.
Did you know ghosts can't tell lies?
You can see right through them.
My jokes have gotten so dad-ly
I've had to register them in three states.
They're considered cruel and unusual punishment in the other 47.
Beauty lies in the eye of the bee-holder.
How do you fix a municipality with lies?
With a mend-a-city program :)
21st June 2020 lies on Sunday, which is also Father's Day, but since we have Solar Eclipse on that day, it's actually Sun-day.
What lies on the ground 100ft in the air?
What's Blue and lies under a mushroom ?
Harry potter had always been hesitant about telling lies when under the invisibility cloak
people always said that they could see right through him!
If a battery is dead does that mean it is current ly not working.
I kind of thought it was a positive joke.
What do call a lion that always lies?
Don't you hate it when a teacher lies and says the homework will be a piece of cake?
It always tastes like paper.
I discovered a locomotive that never lies...
I call it the true true train
What do you call gumbo that only tells lies?
What lies on a seabed and shivers?
What do you call a person who lies awake at night ?
What do you get when Hitler doesn't lie, then lies once, then again, then two more times, then three times, then five, then eight, then thirteen times?
If a Hobit lies all the time
Does that make him a hobitual liar?
What lies under the sea?
Space.
Told to me by my 9yr old.
Edit: the space bar is under the C key for the that don't get it.
Albert Einstein lies on his deathbed.
He had a stroke of genius.
A Canadian lies about a gym membership to sneak in a workout. How does he feel the next morning?
What do you call it when Hitler, Goebbels, Goering and Himmler stand in a line and tell lies?
Following a bad breakup a bartender advised me that happiness lies at the bottom of a tequila bottle
I took it with a grain of salt
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and shivers?
A nervous wreck
(for da best effect read in a nice piratey voice me lads)
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
What lies on its back 100 ft in the air?
What lies on the ocean floor and shakes?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches ?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
What lies on the ocean floor twitching uncontrollably?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
What lies on its back, 100 feet in the air?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
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