Hook is mad
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kelly240361
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08
🚨︎ report
Where does Captain Hook buy his hooks ?

At the second hand store

πŸ‘︎ 85
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fuck-o-Dear
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
🚨︎ report
Where does captain hook get good deals on used prosthetics?

At the second hand store

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/-umop-apisdn
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20
🚨︎ report
The first thing I’ll say if Captain James Hook ever get hit by a truck is

β€œYou ain’t seeing half of the insurance money”

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wu-Chinese
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06
🚨︎ report
When Captain Hook was running away from the ticking alligator..

It must have been very time consuming!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lfantine
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20
🚨︎ report
The metal hooks tied to my rope broke.

I'm having a hard time grappling with this.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Evrant
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03
🚨︎ report
I just found out where Captain Hook got its hook

He got it from a second-hand store

πŸ‘︎ 478
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ryansberc21
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
🚨︎ report
A girl trying to hook up with a mathematician took an algebra class to impress him

It's the thot that counts

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gnar_owl
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12
🚨︎ report
Captain Hook probably bought his hook from a second hand store
πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What is Captain Hook's favourite store?

The second hand shop

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did Captian Hook buy his hook?

A second hand store.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dizz1995
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did Captain Hook purchase his hook?

At a second hand store.

πŸ‘︎ 599
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sk1wbw
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Talking about Peter Pan when my 14 y/o daughter says, "Captain Hook is single-handedly my favorite Disney villain."
πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fatherramon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2018
🚨︎ report
Captain Hook was into sustainability,

that’s why he bought his hook from a second hand store.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChewbaccaNZ
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
Why was Captain Hook such a bad swordsman?

He lost all his first hand experience.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotter66
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did Captain Hook get his hook?

At a second-hand store

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hoosierdaddiesx
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Where does captain hook go for replacements....

The second hand shop

πŸ‘︎ 135
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Northwestern253
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Teacher: You need to have a hook in your research paper. Me:
πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_samdwich_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did the pirate get his hook?

The second hand store

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FYF_IDontCare
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did the pirate buy his hook?

At a second hand store.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fireseeker4him
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Makes me sad that Captain Hook never made it to Admiral

Guess it didn’t Pan out

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
🚨︎ report
TIL that sea-faring pirates were quite progressive in their labor practices, reserving a portion of their loot into an early sort of worker's comp, paying for peg-legs and hooks.

They weren't big fans of arrrbitration.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
When fishing, is there ever a good reason to take the worm off the hook?

I guess that’s debaitable.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MeatsackKY
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the pirate buy a hook so cheap?

He bought it second hand

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Harvey_Combe2217
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2019
🚨︎ report
I love fishing but I can never pull the fish closer once I hook it.

It's a reel problem.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/newkyd
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Trying to hook up on tinder, but you are 5'4?

Just act like you belong

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mcpurp
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2019
🚨︎ report
I tried to hook my sister, Dorothy, up with my co-worker who’s also named Dorothy

But I couldn’t connect the Dots

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boonsnaba
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
🚨︎ report
A boxer was throwing nothing but right hooks at a punching bag. Trainer walks up and says "what gives?"

Boxer says "I'm exercising my rights"

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeverShan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2017
🚨︎ report
Captain Hook bought his prosthetic limb at a second hand store.
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yup4545
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What comes from unprotected casual hook-ups?

Netflix & chilldren

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/YVRJon
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did the pirate get his hooks?

A second hand store.

πŸ‘︎ 141
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordSentinus
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2017
🚨︎ report
Where do single chocolate bars go to hook-up?

Kinder.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dens382
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2018
🚨︎ report
A lot of the girls i hook up with like kissing in the rain

But those are just my shower thots

πŸ‘︎ 61
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Det_Wun_Gai
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2018
🚨︎ report
I stole a spring hook from work

Now I’m a pirate of the carabiners

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/QuartoMaster
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2018
🚨︎ report
How does Capt. Hook wake up in the morning?

He uses an alarm croc!

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoctisAlam
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2018
🚨︎ report
A lot of Russian girls are trying to hook up with American guys online.

But it's really just Putin trying to interfere with our erections.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fatandsalt
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Why can't Peter Pan defeat Captain Hook?

Because his punches Neverland.

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sric2838
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2017
🚨︎ report
Why did the angler bait his hook with uranium?

He wanted to go nuclear fission!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/expo1001
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2018
🚨︎ report
When I was out fishing with my dad I put my beer down to change my hook and it fell over and spilled. He looked at me and said.

Brew...tality!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hooklinersinker
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2018
🚨︎ report
I made a joke about Captain Hook finally winning, but it flopped

Apparently some people don't like dead pan humor

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2017
🚨︎ report
I have faith in the hook I installed

It's something I can hang my hat on

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/torakwho
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2016
🚨︎ report
Apple should make a dating/hook-up app for Muslims...

...and call it iSlam.

πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/necromancer9
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2013
🚨︎ report
I tried to get my two positively-charged friends to hook up

But there was just no attraction

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ginolard
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2017
🚨︎ report
Dad got me hook, line, and sinker.

My dad owns a small garden supply store. Today, he got a new shipment in, and as I was helping him unpack the boxes, I pulled out a couple fishing rods, which he's never stocked before.

Me: You gonna start selling fishing gear?

Dad: Yup.

Me: How come?

Dad: Just for the Halibut.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/graffitizoo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2014
🚨︎ report
My dad and I noticed a hook and ladder outside of our local Target.

Dad: They must be having a fire sale.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBrainSturgeon
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2016
🚨︎ report
Hey all, don't forget to hook up your Deep Fryer today.

Cause today is Fry Day.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kingdomdude
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2014
🚨︎ report
My GF stopped me from hanging up my cardigan on a hook

GF: If you hang your cardigan like that you might put a hole in it!

ME: It actually already has a couple holes in it.

She starts frantically examining the cardigan for holes.

GF: Where?!

ME: Where my arms go through!

Nothing beats the groan of disapproval after successfully landing a dad joke.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/slothboyck
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2014
🚨︎ report
Girlfriend got me while hanging hooks

I was using a stud finder to make sure the fixture I was hanging had enough support

"I've never seen a stud this big"

Girlfriend responds and points at me

"I have"

Palm to face and she laughed so hard she stopped breathing.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pgroepper09
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2015
🚨︎ report
Fishing Hook

A friend of mine got a fishing hook stuck in his leg last night.

My Dad: Is he hooked on fishing now?

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/captinluke
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2014
🚨︎ report
Hook me up!

Every time I walk by this "Liquor" fire department connection at Costco I have to fight the urge to make a "hook me up" joke to anyone within earshot.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kicksoda
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2014
🚨︎ report
Where did captain hook buy his hook

The second hand store

πŸ‘︎ 108
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nihilman
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31
🚨︎ report
Where did Captain Hook get his hook?

From the second hand store.

πŸ‘︎ 532
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πŸ‘€︎ u/afarris5
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did Captain Hook get his hook?

From the second hand store

πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CoolRedman1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did Captain Hook get his hook?

From a second hand store

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Da_Po-Ta-Toe
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did Captain Hook get his hook?

A second-hand store

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/McGtheMemeDealer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did Captain Hook get his hook?

The second hand store

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Andyh10s
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Where does Captain Hook go for Replacements?

The Second Hand Shop

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeevesPoltergist
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Where did Captain Hook get his hook from?

The second hand store!

πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/YankeesFan80
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2016
🚨︎ report

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