She gave me hermit crabs
They’re pregnant now :/
She hates when I call her that.
An oxymoron!
I said, “Well, if you incest”.
Now it's a rocking chair.
The questions is, will Neil Patrick Harris on the back?
This is AUXhilarating
...going twice.
It's hobbit forming!
Over a decade since the Return of the King was released and dad is as topical as ever.
The bar tender says “wow how’d you get that peg leg?” The pirate says one day I was out sailing and a shark jumped aboard and tore it clean off” next the bartender asks “and the hook? How’d you get that?” The pirate responds “well we were out whaling and one leapt out of the water and bit my hand clean off” the bartender then asks, “ok so what about the eyepatch??” The pirate responds “I was out walking on the deck of my ship when I looked up and a seagull shit right in my eye” the bartender is a bit confused and says “that made you lose your eye?” “No” says the pirate “it was my first day with the hook!”
The second hand store.
at a secondhand store
TikTok
Because of the six appeal.
He needed a new tuna
But it was only a buck an ear.
Oh well !! I have to find something else to use as bait now.
Because they keep dropping the bass.
Beauty must really be in the eye of the beerholder
Something catchy.
He's really into podcasting!
One might say he is a master baiter.
Single-handedly.
Because once you lose your first hand, you’re hooked!
It didn’t Pan out.
The bartender comes to him and says 'you look different now, is anything wrong'
Pirate: 'Oh nothing'
'What about your leg, where did it go'
'I boarded a ship, slipped and it got eaten by a shark'
'What about the hook, where did the hand go'
'I lost it in a heated swordfight'
'Then how did you get the eyepatch'
'I was cleaning the deck and a bird pooped in it'
'That doesn't make any sense, how can you get an eyepatch from a bird pooping in your eye'
'It was my first day with the hook'
It must have been very time consuming!
A quackhead
“You ain’t seeing half of the insurance money”
...going twice…
He got it at a second hand store...
at a second hand store.
At a second hand shop.
The second-hand store
The second-hand store.
>!The second hand store.!<
At the second hand store
The second hand store
At a second hand store.
From the second hand store.
