Before the clock strikes midnight on december 31st be sure to lift your left leg
That way you will start off the new year on the right foot
Remember to lift your left leg up off the ground during the New Years countdown
So you can start the New Year off on the right foot
Edit: Thanks for the silver
My black belt friend had to put lifts in his shoes...
...adding insoles to ninjary.
Chris Ubank just advised me to shop lift some kitchen utensils
He said, if I wanted to make it big, I would have to take some whisks.
Just before midnight tonight, I’ll lift up my left leg.
That way, I can start the new year on the right foot.
I was driving and I saw a packet of crisps and I asked “want a lift?”
They said “no thanks we’re walkers”
What does a dad say at the lift?
The lift is from a company named Schindler...so it’s Schindler’s Lift...is this set up as pun on the classic film Schindler’s List? My head is spinning
I've always hated stair lifts..
They really drive me up the wall.
My opinion on lifts...
They have their ups and downs
Who can X-Men and circus performers call to lift their large vehicles?
I asked my grandfather how he’s enjoying the new stair lift that was recently installed in his house.
He said, “I hate it. It’s driving me up the wall.”
It was raining this morning and my wife had to drive right past where I work, so I said 'Will you give me a lift?'
She said 'Have you lost weight? Nice shirt, by the way, and your hair looks fantastic.'
My hotel elevator. Schindler’s Lift
Can't wait for this travel ban to lift. Prague would be my number one choice..
Why didnt Captain America lift Thor’s hammer untill he needed to?
He didn’t want to steal his thunder
The lift is the best part of a roller coaster
The rest is mostly downhill
What’s the difference between Albert Einstein and a guy that breaks wind inside a lift?
Einstein is a smart fella and the guy is.........
a fart smella.
Scientists recently uncovered evidence of a dinosaur that loved to lift weights.
They've decided to call it hella sore.
Sitting in the ER with my son last night, he got me with this one. I was trying to lift his spirits and was pointing out all the crazy equipment they have in the room. I said "Oh look. They have tongue depressers." He says "Those won't work on me." I asked why and he says...
"I'm on antidepressants."
He's going in for surgery at 3:30pm Pacific. All your positive thoughts and prayers are appreciated.
Edit: Thank you all for the kind words and omg for the gold! He's out of surgery and looks to be recovering nicely. All your well wishes helped cheer him and his parents up.
My Dad has always been a Fabrication head at a lift company and my mum is a retired nurse..
According to him, their first date was "A Casual tea"..
I think I’ll apply to a job at a scissor lift factory.
They’re always hiring people.
You know what would really lift my spirits these days?
If I integrated a gym into my liquor store.
I guess this is schindler's lift.
Make sure at 11:59 tonight you lift your left leg
That way you can start the new year on the right foot!
I had an argument with my wife in a lift the other day...
I was wrong on so many levels
I saw a lift with a sign attached that said "due to an error, this lift can't go down"
My first thought was, "well, that's uplifting"
Make sure to lift your left foot up at midnight tonight.
Start 2020 off on the right foot.
All the Avengers got into a lift
But only one couldn’t get out of it.
It was Tony Stuck
My grandfather hates the stair lift I bought him for his birthday.
It's been driving him up the wall.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
I've recently developed an addiction to using lifts
I'm taking steps to get over it.
My niece who is active in politics just had a face lift...
She's an altered stateswoman.
Why did the melon get confused in the lift?
Because it canteloupe from down.
It was always super sad watching my dad being barely able to lift 2-liter bottles of Pepsi.
He was soda pressing.
Edit: better (Hawaiian) punch line
My office block has a Schindler's lift
Before the clock strikes midnight on December 31st be sure to lift your left leg.
That way you will start the new year off on the right foot.