Fruit Basket Puns

That's the last time i order from oedipal arrangements!

I know this isn't strictly a Dad joke, but I feel it is in the spirit of the thing. My dad is getting is getting his leg amputated in January. Essentially he has no cartilage in his ankle, and it causes him severe pain all the time. He has an amazing sense of humor, so I wanted to get him a gift basket of foot-based things. So far I have: -fruit by the foot -Happy Feet -Footloose -an Ihop gift card -pack of tube socks (since now he gets 2 for 1) -Bologna (because his amputation is below knee) -a card saying congrats on the weight loss -all put inside of a stocking

What other foot based pun items would you include in the gift basket?

Before our meal came out, the waiter had brought out a fruit basket with your typical fruit in. My dad picks up a green grape and a purple grape and just stares at them.

Me: "dad, what are you doing?"

Dad: "heh, what did the green grape say to the purple grape?"

Me: "uh, I don't know..."

Dad: "BREATHE, IDIOT!!! BREATHEEEEE!!!!!"

My mom thought it was th funniest shit ever.