My friend told me, β€œYour wife and daughter look like twins!”

I said, β€œWell, they were separated at birth.”

πŸ‘︎ 17k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23
🚨︎ report
My friend works in IT and I asked him, β€œHow do you make a motherboard?”

He said, β€œI usually tell her about my job.”

πŸ‘︎ 16k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11
🚨︎ report
My friend went bald years ago, but still carries his old comb with him.

He just can’t part with it.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23
🚨︎ report
Just watched all the Harry Potter movies back to back with a friend

Stupid, really, because it meant I couldn't see the TV

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jezzter88
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
🚨︎ report
my friend just told me, 'I hope you die in a deep hole filled with water'.

I know he means well.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26
🚨︎ report
I play Chess regularly with my friend, but last time he suddenly said " let's make this interesting "...

..so we stopped and went home.

πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04
🚨︎ report
My friend in the country couldn’t afford his water bill...

So I sent him a β€˜Get Well Soon!’ card.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cyberentomology
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07
🚨︎ report
Almost non of my friends gets this joke
πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Morte420
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16
🚨︎ report
My friend is making a lot of easy money by taking pictures of salmon dressed in human clothes.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21
🚨︎ report
My Himalayan friend has a cow that refuses to stand up.

I always see Himalayan there.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/-taco-rice-
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
🚨︎ report
I asked my Chinese friend what it's like to live in China

He says he can't complain

πŸ‘︎ 258
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dudebrostien
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21
🚨︎ report
I bought my friend an Elephant for her room...

She said "thanks". I said "don't mention it"

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/studentadvisor101
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
🚨︎ report
My friend told me, β€œYou have a B.A., Master’s, and a Ph.D., but you still act like a moron.”

It was a third degree burn.

πŸ‘︎ 483
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14
🚨︎ report
My friend claims that he can print a gun using his 3D printer, but I’m not impressed.

I have had a Canon printer for years.

πŸ‘︎ 17k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
🚨︎ report
It’s been more than 15 years since the show was over, but people are still making β€˜Friends’ references.

No one told me life was gonna be this way.

πŸ‘︎ 77
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22
🚨︎ report
I have a Russian friend who is a sound technician.

And I have a Czech one too. A Czech one too.

πŸ‘︎ 306
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/peach_problems
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09
🚨︎ report
When I was 8 years old my best friend died from a velcro accident.

RIP

πŸ‘︎ 177
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thedrivingcat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15
🚨︎ report
My doctor friend is addicted to hitting his patients on their knees to check their reflexes.

He really gets a kick out of it.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
🚨︎ report
I once got into a bar fight with the number 1. His friends 3, 5, 7, and 9 showed up to help him.

The odds were against me.

πŸ‘︎ 163
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nnishanth
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07
🚨︎ report
I was really angry at my friend Mark for stealing my dictionary

I said, β€œMark, my words!”

πŸ‘︎ 356
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
🚨︎ report
No world for old friends. (Howie & Aidan robot discourses, iaio #23 by how.how comics)
πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HowDotHow
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23
🚨︎ report
On a recent flight, my friend asked me, β€œIf the door suddenly opens, you think we will fall out?”

I said, β€œNo, we will still be friends.”

πŸ‘︎ 200
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16
🚨︎ report
I’ve been saying β€œmucho” to my Spanish friend a lot more often lately

It means a lot to him

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DieserBene
πŸ“…︎ May 26
🚨︎ report
My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon, but wasn’t awarded a gold medal.

The Chinese refuse to acknowledge Ty won.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 19
🚨︎ report
My friend was really proud of his British heritage until he found out that his great grandfather was from Transylvania.

Now he can’t even look at himself in the mirror.

πŸ‘︎ 729
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19
🚨︎ report
2020 is just one long episode of Friends...

Because it hasn’t been my day, my week, my month or even my year

πŸ‘︎ 58
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nigeriantoast
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16
🚨︎ report
So I had this conversation with a friend just now
πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Atairy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07
🚨︎ report
The other day I had a friend ask me what I thought about Bruce Willis

Told him I'm a Die Hard fan

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/axiomaticsteve
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20
🚨︎ report
I was talking to my friend and he asked me, β€œAs a young boy was your mom strict with you?” I told him, β€œTo be honest,...

β€œ...my mother was never a young boy.”

πŸ‘︎ 211
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30
🚨︎ report
There were two friends and one of them wanted to open up a gelato shop.

When the friend finally got the location to run the shop he tried to get some experienced and dedicated employees. However, he soon realized that all the good employees for a gelato shop were already working at some nearby locations. So he had to deal with some mediocre people who didn’t care that much about gelatos. Then a day before the opening of the shop the person who was supposed to provide the materials for the gelatos called in as sick. Finally there were also some teenagers who decided to steal some of the decorations.

When the friend told this story the other friend then said,

#β€œMan, you have gelat of problems.”

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ThatGuy3036
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16
🚨︎ report
My friend joined a cult who believe that we’ll all turn to water and be evaporated into a bigger life force...

I said... you’ll be mist...

πŸ‘︎ 59
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Londoner1982
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23
🚨︎ report
My friend is a rapper with insomnia

Lil’ Sleep

πŸ‘︎ 605
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15
🚨︎ report
My friend just hired a limo for a $1000 but it didn't come with a driver !

Imagine spending all that money and having nothing to chauffeur it

πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15
🚨︎ report
So I told this joke about bombs to my friends

But it got diffused

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/marshmello100
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23
🚨︎ report
I asked my North Korean friend how it was there...

...he said he couldn't complain.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MacItaly
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine is starting a new business... he thinks there's going to be a huge demand for cannabis-fed cattle.

I thought about investing, but the steaks are too high.

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VA_DiagSexAddict
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23
🚨︎ report
My flat-earther friend was determined to walk to the edge of the world to prove it's flat.

in the end, he came around.

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21
🚨︎ report
My friend’s bakery burned down

Now his business is toast

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Demosthenes-42
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02
🚨︎ report
My friend thinks he's a paranoid

I said, don't worry. You're not alone.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/natan_edm
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22
🚨︎ report
A friend set me up on a blind date. He said "She's a lovely girl, but there's something you should know. She's expecting a baby"

I felt like a right idiot sitting in a bar wearing nothing but a diaper.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13
🚨︎ report
My friend Shirley was obsessedwith adverb grammar but would never get off her ass.

We called her Slowly Butt Shirley

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/beyond_hate
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12
🚨︎ report
My friend is addicted to brake cleaner

He says he can stop whenever he wants

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/XDG-Diggz74
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
🚨︎ report
I asked my friend: How was the Indian dinner?

He said "Pretty good. Why do you ask"

"Just curry-us"

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KeanoTsao
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05
🚨︎ report
My dad just told me this one: Two WiFi engineer friends of mine just got married.

The wedding was ok, but the reception was fantastic!

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/StefanE30325i
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16
🚨︎ report
A friend asked me for a delicately infused hot drink.

So I gave him a subtlety.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/E420CDI
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21
🚨︎ report
My friend and I went fishing. He cast out first and got a bite. So he reeled in a trumpet. Then he cast out in a different area, got a bite and reeled in a clarinet.

After he cast out the third time, I said "maybe you'll reel in a bass soon!"

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19
🚨︎ report
I've noticed I have been saying "mucho" more when speaking with my Hispanic friends...

It means a lot to them.

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hackmycomputer
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
🚨︎ report
Friend: How'd you know my favorite basketball player was Dirk Nowitski?

Me: I took a stab in the Dirk

Friend: Oh God nooooo!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/savedbytheb3l1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17
🚨︎ report
My friend just got a job as a elevator repair technician

they're really moving up in the company.

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
My wife says she’s got a friend that only eats vegetables.

Not sure if it’s true, I haven’t met herbivore.

πŸ‘︎ 65
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26
🚨︎ report
My friend who worked at an orange soda factory said they had small boats in thier factory

I heard they go sailing on the hi-c's

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gnar_owl
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22
🚨︎ report
My next door neighbor and I are good friends, so we decided to share our water supply.

We got a long well.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21
🚨︎ report
I was telling my friend there's only one thing I get really scared of at Halloween.

"Which is?" he asked.

"Exactly."

πŸ‘︎ 546
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Burlapin
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17
🚨︎ report
My friend has no arms and loves to make jokes about it. They're never any good though.

He doesn't have a funny bone in his body.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Swanbrother
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
🚨︎ report
I wrote a card for my friend who just graduated high school and wants to study geology and/or paleontology in college. She also likes puns :)
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Neutrinoccino
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26
🚨︎ report
My friend wouldn't believe that Canada has a Prime Minster.

I told him it's Trudeau.

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gubaxter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
My name’s David, but my Chinese friends call me Dawei.

I guess that’s just dawei it is.

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/deceze
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
🚨︎ report
The other day, my hot friend told me he could sign a piece of paper with his hotness.

Me, being fed up with him always boasting, I asked," How could you even do that?"

With a smug smile plastered on his face, he replied," Thermal Signature."

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RespectfulRat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22
🚨︎ report
My friend called me in a panic and shouted, β€œAn evil wizard turned me into a tiny harp! I don’t know what to do!” Frantically, I drove all the way to his house only to find out...

...he’s really a big lyre.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flamingkitten101
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29
🚨︎ report
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water."

I know he means well.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tankerman05
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09
🚨︎ report
A friend once asked me, β€œHow are your legs not sweating?”

I said, β€œIt’s all in the jeans.”

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CGSauce101
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22
🚨︎ report
Here is a pun for all my bible reading friends

In an alternate universe, God sends popeye down to speak to moses. When Moses asks Popeye who he is, he responds
"I yam who yam"

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12
🚨︎ report
My friend from Paris took part in a national barista contest

And he won! I read it in the French press

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HiTek_142857
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22
🚨︎ report
I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet.

I don’t know Y.

πŸ‘︎ 100
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09
🚨︎ report
Today, my friend asked me β€œwho is going to protect us from COVID?”

I said β€œyes they are.”

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/warmLuke0
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18
🚨︎ report
My friend sat on a battery the other day.

I asked if they were shocked?

I know, I know, it’s a revolting joke.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/davidwayland
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
🚨︎ report
My friend loves napping

I find him very into resting

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thoompa
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04
🚨︎ report
My friend in Germany says that there has been panic buying of sausages and cheese . . .

It's the Wurst KΓ€se scenario

Credit: Twitter, Bruce Lawson (@brucel)

πŸ‘︎ 14k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Althesia
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18
🚨︎ report
My friend Richard bought a new house only to rebuild as ugly as he could. All his new neighbors hate him.

It was a Dick move.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nodegen
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03
🚨︎ report
My friend is inventing breakthrough upholstery fabric that can self-mend rips and tears. When I asked how he's progressing, he replied....

Sofa sew good.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/writenroll
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01
🚨︎ report
a friend of mine dared me to steal some kitchen supplies

but that just wasn't a whisk I was willing to take

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Zayyded
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09
🚨︎ report
My friend texted me saying he jumped off a tower, I said yeah right...

He says β€˜I’m dead serious!’

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OttoTheGeezer
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23
🚨︎ report
During his wedding, my friend told me that I was the worst best man he has ever seen.

I was speechless.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22
🚨︎ report
Mike Tyson and I were talking about our friend Sarah who had just gotten into town. I asked, "so, how did she get from L.A. to here?" He replied...

"Theraflu."

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DanGlerrBOY89
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19
🚨︎ report
My friend from high school became an engineer or something.

He would design vehicles and stuff like no other.

One day he called me and said he had a very special design planned for his next vehicle.

So I asked him: "What's the big design you're working on?"

He said: "Its a secret. You'll find out later."

A few months later, he sends me a picture of this amazing motorbike that's entirely made of wood and nothing else. I called him back and told him I really liked it and if I could ride it.

He replied in a deep and depressing voice: "You can't I'm sorry. I threw it away."

I asked him why he threw away such a masterpiece he worked so hard to make.

He replied: "I tried everything..... But it just wooden start!"

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/_joshi_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21
🚨︎ report
One day I invited a friend of mine over to my apartment.

When he arrived, he saw a lot of decorations related to frogs and asked me why.

I said: "It's because I'm trying to pull a prank on my flatmate. I'm trying to see how long it takes him to realise that our apartment is filled with frogs."

My friend said: "It's a nice prank ngl. Has he been close to finding out you live with apartment full of frog decorations?"

I said: "Not yet but I'm really starting to panic."

He asked me why and I said: "Because this type of prank is not easy. It requires a lot of Kermit-ment"

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/_joshi_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22
🚨︎ report
Son: "Hey Dad, Happy 25th Anniversary. Jeez! Almost all my friend's parents are divorced. What did you have to do to stay married for this long?"

Dad: "Keep mum."

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ball5deeper
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15
🚨︎ report
My friends and I were discussing about different kinds of alcoholic drinks, and this guy kept talking about a Japanese one

just for the Sake of it

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/coconutbunch
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
My friend bought me a telekinetic abacus for my birthday.

It wasn't my favorite present, but it's the thought that counts.

πŸ‘︎ 39
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Aagistar
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
Getting quite tired of my friends calling me a pathological liar

Being the head of the NSA during the week and captaining the International Space Station on the weekends can be very exhausting

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xtilexx
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine was telling me about her first day working at a zoo...

When she arrived at the zoo she went to see her manager and asked what she should do, the manager told her to first go feed the sharks, so she went off to feed them. Whilst she was shovelling the food into the pool a shark jumped out of the water and tried to bite her, as a reflex she hit the shark with the spade and the shark died. Worried about losing her job this soon the woman started brainstorming what to do, eventually she decided to feed the dead shark to the lions thereby removing all evidence and so that is what she did. Shaken but glad she had avoided detection the women went back to see her manager and asked if there was anything else that needed doing, she was told to go and clean out the monkey cage.. So off the woman went with a wheelbarrow and shovel to clean out the cage, as she was shovelling the poop into the barrow a monkey jumped down from the tree towards her! As a reflex reaction the women smashed the monkey with the spade and it lay dead. Thankfully she knew jus

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SidB_22
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20
🚨︎ report
My best friend has a good eye for dad jokes...

But the jokes couldn’t be any cornea.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/azzawith2zs
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
🚨︎ report
My friend got me a prostitute for my birthday, but he didn't know I'm turned off by bad teeth.

I didn't check though because you don't look a gift whore in the mouth.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xknav3x
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20
🚨︎ report
I have a big dick friend

He is 7 feet tall, and his name is Richard

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pugulishus
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
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A friend of mine overdosed on Viagra today.

I feel sorry was his wife. She’s taking it pretty hard.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Puns-alot
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02
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My friend made a joke about wanting to steal my weight set.

I told him it was not something to take lightly.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Stepoo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24
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My friend is planning to do vasectomies on killer whales.

But he prefers the term orchestrating

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BinaryPeach
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
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I called my friend to tell him about my big promotion and how it comes with a lot of new responsibilities now that I'm running the business. He asked what my new job was and how I was holding up.

I told him "I'm generally managing"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shantron5000
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21
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What shark doesn't have any friends?

A loan shark

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pollrobots
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06
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My friend asked me if I wanted to hear a really good Batman impression, so I said go on then. He shouted, "NOT THE KRYPTONITE!" and I said, "That's Superman..."

"Thanks, man," he replied, "I've been practising a lot."

πŸ‘︎ 407
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lafuss_tent
πŸ“…︎ May 24
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My friend is a ghost writer.

He is currently working on his boo-ography.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 18
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I friend of mine got married...

She got a new name and a dress out of it.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23
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I was really mad at my friend Mark for stealing my dictionary.

I said, β€œMark, my words!”

πŸ‘︎ 61
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07
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My friend has a pet invertebrate.

The pet loves reading. Guess you could say he is a bookworm.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_BRaiN_LaG_
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30
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After going back to college to get yet another degree, some of my friends made fun of me for it.

They were some real 3rd degree burns.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/turtle-tamer-73
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21
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Asking for a friend.
πŸ‘︎ 56
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lococlyde
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28
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My best friend's bakery burned down last night.

Now his business is toast.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ashwynee
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10
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