Did you hear there was a photo store robbed recently? They caught the robber, but he says he was framed.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fewlesspro
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Mona Lisa was framed.

Then they hung her.

πŸ‘︎ 208
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πŸ‘€︎ u/profedon
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad brings home a nice framed photo. Me: Hey dad, are you going to put it up yourself?

Dad: No, I'm going to put it up on that wall

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/prasaadii
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I was framed for art forgery.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lfantine
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2018
🚨︎ report
I framed a picture the other day

The poor thing is now serving 20 years for murder.

πŸ‘︎ 89
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tom555
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2016
🚨︎ report
If someone sneaks across a steal framed bridge...

...are they a truss-passer?

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bcjgreen
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2016
🚨︎ report
My grandad on a framed certificate I got recently

As I hand it to my nan,

Nan: oh its mounted!

Grandad: I see no horse?

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AutisticDyslexic
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2014
🚨︎ report
Holiday to-do list: 1) shoot the family 2) hang the kids 3) frame the wife

$129.95 at JC Penny Portrait and Framing Studio

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sattoth
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I got my grandma a new walking frame made by NASA and she's starting to get the hang of it...

It's one small step for Nan....

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me if I’d seen the dog bowl..

I said β€œI didn’t know he could.”

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FlintTheDad
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
🚨︎ report
There was a man who a had an entirely wooden car. Wooden frame, wooden wheels, wooden engine. Did he ride it? No.

It wooden start.

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MonkeyLord_11
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a selfie that’s so good you put it in a frame?

A shelfie.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kvnhntn
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
🚨︎ report
To the person who stole my spectacles. I will find you.

I have contacts.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OliPark
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Respect the trees
πŸ‘︎ 583
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
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It’s got a wooden frame, wooden engine, wooden wheels and a wooden gas tank. Did he ride it? No, wooden start
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dunkinbiskits
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A woodcutter once decided to build his own motor bike. He used wood for the frame, wood for the engine, wood for the brakes, and even a wooden gas tank.

Did he ride it? No. It wooden start

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_methematician
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy who was stealing people's window panes?

Apparently it was panes taking work.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/smakattak
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What person can shoot somebody, then frame you for being there?

A photographer

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BustyNinja69
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
🚨︎ report
After I was arrested, my ex-wife decided to hang a picture of my mugshot on the wall in her living room.

But she still won't admit she framed me.

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DestroyatronMk8
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
🚨︎ report
My bed used to be on the floor but I recently bought a bed frame

I can honestly say the quality of my sleep is slightly above where it used to be

πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/XxTURDxTACOxX
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the picture go to jail?

Because it was framed

πŸ‘︎ 85
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
The fiance and I were looking at frames for our wedding photos.

We couldn't settle between two of them. My wife couldn't take her eyes off the smaller one, but I wanted the larger one.

So, I told her, "Honey, you need to look at the bigger picture."

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BigMartin58
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Mona Lisa was once accused of murder....

Turns out, she was framed.

πŸ‘︎ 73
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πŸ‘€︎ u/saulfineman
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when a bowler knocks down all the pins in a practice frame?

A preemptive strike.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DavideoandPhoto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I could use help refining this one

Many of you probably know what it’s like to have part of a joke or a punchline that you can’t seem to put together into one full working joke. Here’s what I’ve got:

The film’s last frame, already used, says to the camera, β€œCome on, take another photo, I don’t mind.”

To which the camera replies, β€œAre you sure? I wouldn’t want to superimpose.”

It’s there but it’s not quite. Any help?

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AndrewZabar
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Friend purchased a wooden motorcycle. Wooden frame, wooden engine, wooden wheels. I asked if they had ridden it and they said no...

Wooden start

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JonRanch1989
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the carpenter say as they were being arrested?

I was FRAMED!

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperMcG
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Are people born with a photographic memory?

Or does it take time to develop?

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/YesImThatJ
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Son, do you know why was the picture sent to jail?

Because It was framed.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/balkso
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the difference between a useless Scottish girl and a giggling auto frame?

The first is a chaffy lassie. The other is a laughy chassis.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tomato_soup_
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
🚨︎ report
I went to the museum and saw a painting of a criminal, who claimed his innocence and insisted the police planted evidence.

The frame was remarkable

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Strungen
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My son was being very noisy attaching cross-laced string to an oval frame. I had to tell him...

Stop making that racket.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlRedux
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Real Dad Joke

I pulled this one on my adult son, who had ordered a bed, bed frame and mattress from Amazon, and was waiting for them to arrive....

Son: "I'm mad that it's taking my bed so long to arrive!"

Me: "You shouldn't take that lying down."

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paul99501
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the Bowling Pin say when it was accused?

β€œI’ve been framed!”

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BeerMan
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife says that I wasted money by ordering a 3 meter wide frame for our wedding photo.

Well, I think she should look at the bigger picture.

πŸ‘︎ 172
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2019
🚨︎ report
******The Hunchshaq of Notre Dame***** (Frame from the YouTube video β€œshaq eats a hot wing content aware scale”)
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeclanKav18
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Banksy seems like a trustworthy artist.

Sure he's kind of shady, a bit sketchy, but he's not trying to frame me.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeeSeaBayBee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went after it set.

finally it dawned on me.

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thetallestwizard
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My son can fix all your plumbing, bring your electrical up to code and handle any framing or carpentry you could imagine

His name is Jack

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Emeri5
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Sometimes it is better to just walk away from things and go back to them later when you’re in a better frame of mind.

While it's true, that's how I lost my job as a surgeon.

πŸ‘︎ 66
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the picture tell the lawyer?

Help! I’ve been framed.

πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Di_Ma_Re_Bra
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Trying to write some clean jokes about bowling balls

but they keep ending up in the gutter.

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/maximusheadroom
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
🚨︎ report
You’re the world’s greatest dad although my frame of reference is pretty limited.

Happy Father’s Day fellow dads!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jangooni
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2019
🚨︎ report
You coud say Marge's out of frame
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrFense
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2018
🚨︎ report
We’re going to pick up my glasses from the optometrist

What are we doing next? We’ll see.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LTenaciouSD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Mona Lisa was framed!

Then they hung her!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/profedon
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2019
🚨︎ report
My dad’s motorbike has a wooden frame, wooden engine, wooden wheels, and a wooden gas tank. Did he ride it?

Nope, it wooden start

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paoerfuuul
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the picture go to jail?

It was framed!

πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eggsy_anon
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
🚨︎ report

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