I was surprised that the only gift I got for my birthday was a bucket of Play-Doh.

I don’t know what to make of it.

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
On the eve of a record breaking cold winter night, a wife notices her husband run to the backyard with a bucket in his hand.

She grabs a cup of hot cocoa and watches through the window as he fills the bucket up with water and races from the back of the house all the way out to the front yard and out of sight. She bundles up and goes outside to get a closer look and sees that he’s cleared the snow from the sidewalk. She watches as he takes his bucket of water and pours it out on the cold concrete. She’s puzzled for a second and then says:

Icy, what you did there.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NotMetheThree
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
One bucket, two bucketth, three bucketth, four bucketth...

Sorry, it’s my bucket lisp

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlexOfTheEarth
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ll always remember what my dad said before he kicked the bucket.

He said, β€œHey! How far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/teapin
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I got a new bucket.

It's much better than my old bucket because the new one came with a lid.

It pails in comparison, really.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/baconbuddy95
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to the doctor and said, I feel like a bucket

Doctor said, you do look a bit pale

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lawsonator85
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
All my friends have such expansive bucket lists.

Mine is just pail in comparison.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
🚨︎ report
The other day I saw a bucket at the hardware store with a sign that said: dead batteries - $1 each.

I thought to myself β€œthese should be free of charge”.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/corbimatic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I'll never forget my old man's last words before he kicked the bucket:

"Son, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 96
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DevonWhiteTurnUp
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Man had the courage to come into my office and ask what the bucket, the rope, and the pipes were for...

Well, well, well.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Parkwad
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know the last thing my grandfather said to me before he kicked the bucket?

"Grandson, watch how far I can kick this bucket."

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BroSose
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
There once was a man who would buy tons of buckets of roofing sealant, change the label then resell them.

Sometimes he would simply rename the brand. Sometimes he would name it a different product entirely. In a few horrific instances he repackaged it as food products. Eventually he was found, arrested, and brought to court. And though he admitted to doing all those things, he insisted that he had done nothing illegal and that moreover, his actions were protected by the law and the Constitution. His reasoning?

"I have the right to rename sealant!!!"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/epicukulele
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
My son just kicked the bucket.

It only went 4 feet.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SSS_is_the_best
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Buckets are pathetic compared to bathtubs

In fact they pail in comparison

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chrisvskris
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
My Bucket Liszt
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tedshif
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call something that is red and shaped like a bucket?

a red bucket

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ohnomywaffle
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I was with my son in the sandbox and he said, β€œtake this shovel and start filling up this bucket, got it?”

I dig.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zedhead0628
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Buckets
πŸ‘︎ 201
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CosmoFt
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the bucket bounce?

Because it was filled with spring water.

πŸ‘︎ 71
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thekingofwombats
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2020
🚨︎ report
How did the deaf guy finally kick the bucket?

You see, he had hearing AIDS

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Satanic_Smaug
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2020
🚨︎ report
My bucket list
  1. Set myself more goals.
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
🚨︎ report
My 5 year old granddaughter kept following me while holding a bucket. I asked her what the bucket was for and she said . . .

β€œDad says if you kick it, we’ll be rich!!”

πŸ‘︎ 52
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s the difference between a tuna, piano, and a bucket of glue.

You can tun a piano but you can’t tun a tuna

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
🚨︎ report
I like my women how i like my buckets, pale.
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bloodywolfeyes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Looks like someone kicked the bucket
πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JusMonika
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I was just working on my bucket list
πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toku-Nation
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
🚨︎ report
My nephew said he was trying to help out when he spilled a bucket of water from the hole in the ground...

I knew he meant well.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/celticdude234
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
🚨︎ report
The Doctor could tell right away the bucket was sick.

It was looking a bit pale.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zenofire
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What should be at the top of everyone’s bucket list?

The date you wrote the bucket list.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpankMyMetroid
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
🚨︎ report
A plastic bucket vs. a metal bucket . . .

Pails in comparison

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was the bucket so embarrassed at the beach?

Because of how pail it was.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jrhood92
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I’m heartbroken that I lost a bucket of sand, silt, and gravel.

It was of great sedimentary value.

πŸ‘︎ 425
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I was in a KFC in Prague, standing in line waiting to order my lunch when I noticed the beautiful girl wearing a black and white tiled apron who was giving the man in front of me a bucket of Buffalo wings..and then it dawned on me.

I was checking out a chequered Czech check-out chick who was checking out some chicken at the checkout.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buggaboobooy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2019
🚨︎ report
How can you tell when a bucket is sick?

When it's a little pail.

πŸ‘︎ 95
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s the difference between a bucket and a barrel?

A bucket pails in comparison.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hephsters
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
🚨︎ report
My uncle can't afford a toilet, so he has to use a bucket.

We all have to make do sometimes.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GRWeston
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I'll never forget the last thing my dad said to me before he kicked the bucket.......

He said: "Son, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrBlue08
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I'll never forget the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket.

"Watch how far I can kick this bucket!!!:

πŸ‘︎ 67
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πŸ‘€︎ u/flannel-ish
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2020
🚨︎ report
All my friends have really expansive bucket lists.

Mine is just a little pail in comparison.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I remember the last thing my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket, it was...

β€œHey how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SouperDumb
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I'll always remember what my grandfather said to me just before he kicked the bucket.

He said, "Grandson...How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 106
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Randyaster
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What did grandpa say before kicking the bucket?

Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pickledust465
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I remember the last thing your grandpa said before he kicked the bucket... it was:

"Hey, how far do you think i can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JosephA420
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I still remember what my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket.

He said "kiddo wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shirpersons
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
🚨︎ report
All of my friends have such expansive bucket lists.

But mine is a little pail into comparison.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ll never forget my dads last words before he kicked the bucket. He looked me in the eyes and said

β€œSon”... β€œhow far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

πŸ‘︎ 74
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Ill always remember what my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket.

"Hey son you wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yergaflerga
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2020
🚨︎ report
All of my friends have such expansive bucket lists.

Mine is just a little pail in comparison.

πŸ‘︎ 283
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2019
🚨︎ report

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