But, I don't think anything would make my Budweiser.
Because they're full of hops
Too hoppy for me.
Me: Well, that’s your Uncle Frank. That’s where he wanted his remains. It was his favorite beer stein. He always said it would be funny. Never understood why. Son: Maybe it’s so he could be Frank in Stein Me: That son of a bitch!
And yes, just to be clear: not original, saw it on discord, checked this sub, 6 months since last time this joke was posted here.
Gnatty light.
He wasn't happy.
The bartender says we don't serve food here
I did some yardwork yesterday and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer. The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking. My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing, and I said, "Nothing." The reason I said "nothing" instead of saying "just thinking" is because she then would have asked, "About what?" At that point I would have had to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics, which would lead to other questions. Finally I pondered an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts? Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts, but how could they know? Well, after another beer, and some more heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with an answer to that question. Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby, and even though I obviously couldn't really know, here is the reason for my conclusion: A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child." But you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts." I rest my case. Time for another beer.
It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.
American canned beer, 'cause it's A meri can (A merry can, geddit ?)
Beer nuts are $1.50 but deer nuts are under a buck
🍺 Beer is more nutritious than other alcoholic drinks.
🍺 Beer can help protect your heart.
🍺 Beer helps prevent kidney stones.
🍺 Beer lowers bad cholesterol.
🍺 Beer strengthens your bones.
🍺 Beer helps reduce stress.
🍺 Beer may help improve memory.
🍺 Beer helps cognitive function.
... because hebrew
"... and one for the road."
But I dont think itll make my budweiser
As we were leaving, wife says "Gee, they have a lot of feral cats." I said "Surprised they don't have a lot of feral rabbits." HUH? Because of all the hops they use!
Febrewery
So I had him put it in a square glass.
It’s already gone viral.
The Yakoozie!
...the 18th and 19th.
It was quite the brew-haha.
“No!”, said the doctor. “I wanted a butt light.”
Give him a lifejacket!
From my 7 yr old.
Me: "Hey dad, hypothetically, if the world suddenly ran out of beer, what would you do?"
Dad: "I'd probably swap to pandas."
Me: "Is ... is that like a type of cider?"
Dad: "No, it's a black and white animal."
Me: "Dad? There aren't any pandas in New Zealand?"
Dad: "Well, there's no bears either."
It's the HOPS!
"They're draft horses"
Bloodweiser
It was too hoppy!
We had to hold Hans.
When they bring a coaster.
One is $1.29 and the other is under a buck
They're full of hops!
And a mop.
Now I just have beer
And now I have beer.
Cause they are full of hops.
Me: Well, that’s your Uncle Frank. That’s where he wanted his remains. It was his favorite beer stein. He always said it would be funny. Never understood why.
Son: Maybe it’s so he could be Frank in Stein
Me: That son of a bitch!
Beer nuts are a $1:37. Deer nuts are under a buck.
