Batman is afraid of bats, and Spider-Man is afraid of spiders.

Now I know why they call me a ladies' man.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 307
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/wimpykidfan37
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 05 2021
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A group of geese is a gaggle, agroup of rats: a mischief, a murder of crows, bats a colony and men a crowd. What's a group of batmen?

An orphanage.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 143
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jayjay3078
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 11 2021
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What did batman say to robin before they got into the bat mobile?

Robin get in the car.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 409
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/noodlesvonsoup
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 18 2020
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I caught a man trying to break into my house last night. He was wearing football pads, swimming trunks, ice skates and holding a baseball bat.

I said, β€œOi, what’s your game?”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/adfunk101
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 27 2021
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What makes it okay for bats to just poop wherever they want?

For a bat, every room is the batroom.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/teduh
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 10 2020
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Mess with the bat you get the gat
πŸ‘οΈŽ 35
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/catchingfire3HG
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 22 2020
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I once tried to kill a giant mouse with a baseball bat

Now I have a lifetime ban from Disney world

πŸ‘οΈŽ 54
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mystic_Frost69
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 13 2020
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Bat htub
πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bobetron676
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 29 2020
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Every country will eventually get coronavirus, but china got it right off the bat
πŸ‘οΈŽ 43
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NaziMen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 05 2020
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Bats not only cause Corona, they could also cause bad puns. v.redd.it/rejaq9nx7sx41
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MShafiS
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 09 2020
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Did you know the name Bat is actually a short form...

The full name is Bathew

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NairodI
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 02 2020
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Baseball bat
πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CurtisViridian
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 26 2019
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What is a bat's favorite spice?

Oreguano.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ChazoftheWasteland
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 28 2020
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To the bat mobile!!
πŸ‘οΈŽ 49
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Samoneggs
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 16 2019
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Why are bats so bad at business?

They always fly-by-night.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AlwaysWorseAtNight
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 05 2019
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Baseball Bat (Visual Pun)
πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BlastLeatherwing
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2019
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What has a little penis and hangs down? A bat. What has a big penis and hangs up?

click

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ZZEZ73
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 01 2019
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Rare diseases carried by bat droppings

Be careful to avoid bat droppings. You can catch a rare disease from them that can drive you batshit crazy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/aiaor
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 09 2020
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From wizard to vampire to bat…
πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/shloks7
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 02 2019
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Steal everyone's eyelids and no one bats an eye...

Remove their brains from their skulls and everyone loses their mind...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 128
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 25 2018
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Why did the chicken go to KFC during lunch hour with a baseball bat?

It wanted to beat the crowd.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 17 2019
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Yellow bats indeed v.redd.it/xfnnv4h3ywl11
πŸ‘οΈŽ 70
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PotatoGuy339
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 14 2018
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Baseball bat
πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Coagulated_Jellyfish
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 24 2019
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Serve alcohol at a party and nobody bats an eye

Serve laxatives at a party and everybody loses their shit!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 70
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lachdog982
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 11 2019
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People tend to not be too fond of the movie Ferngully, but I think it just has a bat rap
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/herurumeruru
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 03 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw a bat fly today.

It hit a home-run.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cyborgladiator
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 06 2019
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A vampire bat returned to his colony with a lot of blood on his face. When the other bats asked him what happened he pointed to a building and said: β€œSee that cow barn over there?”

β€œI didn’t.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/KingWilliamVI
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 17 2019
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What did the rat say when he saw a bat?

β€œOh my!! I just saw an angel!!”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 19 2019
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How come when women use chemicals to remove polish no one bats an eye

But when hitler does it the whole world is against him?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WattoNUFC
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 27 2019
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Bat-problem

Robin: Batman, Batman, there is a problem with the Batmobile, it does not start.

Batman: Must be the battery.

Robin: What is a tery????

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/geekcommunicant
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 02 2019
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Batman is a fruit bat.

I saw him eating a bananananananananananananana!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ridley_Himself
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 13 2018
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Me: Dad I have bats in my attic

Dad: baseball or softball?

Real life encounter with my dad. The legends are true. Dad jokes prevail.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/crisp-high-five
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 25 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you explain getting hit with a baseball bat made of sound?

It Hertz.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Pepisboi420
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 14 2019
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Things were not looking well for the elk and the bat that were in hospital after a car accident

They were hanging on to deer life

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CaledonianWarrior
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 02 2019
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What three things are most important to bats about their local real estate?

Echolocation Echolocation Echolocation

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ChrisCGCThree
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the bat/donkey hybrid?

It's pretty bat-ass!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Tippydaug
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 29 2017
🚨︎ report
I hit my friend with a baseball bat

He couldn't look me in the eye after what I did

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ethannnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 14 2019
🚨︎ report
A wild bat bit me, so I bit him back..

As they say.. "Bit for Bat"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/music_snobbbb
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 23 2018
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πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Target359
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 29 2018
🚨︎ report
What kind of bats swing upside down?

Acro-bats!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SnyeChan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 07 2018
🚨︎ report
The bat(h)mobile
πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/elvisspringsteen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 22 2018
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Two vampire bats in a cave, one goes out in search of fresh blood in the local village, and comes back with a face covered in red blood. His friend says "what did you eat to get all that?" The first bat replies:

"You see that steeple on that church over there? Yeah, I hit it."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/palpameme_66
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 14 2018
🚨︎ report
Why does a baseball bat have no parents?

Because it's just a Bat, man!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mountain-Economy7268
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report

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