Batman is afraid of bats, and Spider-Man is afraid of spiders.

Now I know why they call me a ladies' man.

πŸ‘︎ 307
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wimpykidfan37
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
🚨︎ report
A group of geese is a gaggle, agroup of rats: a mischief, a murder of crows, bats a colony and men a crowd. What's a group of batmen?

An orphanage.

πŸ‘︎ 143
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jayjay3078
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11
🚨︎ report
What did batman say to robin before they got into the bat mobile?

Robin get in the car.

πŸ‘︎ 409
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πŸ‘€︎ u/noodlesvonsoup
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I caught a man trying to break into my house last night. He was wearing football pads, swimming trunks, ice skates and holding a baseball bat.

I said, β€œOi, what’s your game?”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/adfunk101
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27
🚨︎ report
Why does a baseball bat have no parents?

Because it's just a Bat, man!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What makes it okay for bats to just poop wherever they want?

For a bat, every room is the batroom.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/teduh
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Mess with the bat you get the gat
πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/catchingfire3HG
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I once tried to kill a giant mouse with a baseball bat

Now I have a lifetime ban from Disney world

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mystic_Frost69
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Bat htub
πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobetron676
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Every country will eventually get coronavirus, but china got it right off the bat
πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NaziMen
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Bats not only cause Corona, they could also cause bad puns. v.redd.it/rejaq9nx7sx41
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MShafiS
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know the name Bat is actually a short form...

The full name is Bathew

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NairodI
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Baseball bat
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CurtisViridian
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What is a bat's favorite spice?

Oreguano.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2020
🚨︎ report
To the bat mobile!!
πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Samoneggs
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are bats so bad at business?

They always fly-by-night.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Baseball Bat (Visual Pun)
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlastLeatherwing
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What has a little penis and hangs down? A bat. What has a big penis and hangs up?

click

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZZEZ73
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Rare diseases carried by bat droppings

Be careful to avoid bat droppings. You can catch a rare disease from them that can drive you batshit crazy.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aiaor
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
🚨︎ report
From wizard to vampire to bat…
πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shloks7
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Steal everyone's eyelids and no one bats an eye...

Remove their brains from their skulls and everyone loses their mind...

πŸ‘︎ 128
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the chicken go to KFC during lunch hour with a baseball bat?

It wanted to beat the crowd.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Yellow bats indeed v.redd.it/xfnnv4h3ywl11
πŸ‘︎ 70
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PotatoGuy339
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2018
🚨︎ report
Baseball bat
πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Serve alcohol at a party and nobody bats an eye

Serve laxatives at a party and everybody loses their shit!

πŸ‘︎ 70
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lachdog982
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2019
🚨︎ report
People tend to not be too fond of the movie Ferngully, but I think it just has a bat rap
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/herurumeruru
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw a bat fly today.

It hit a home-run.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cyborgladiator
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
🚨︎ report
A vampire bat returned to his colony with a lot of blood on his face. When the other bats asked him what happened he pointed to a building and said: β€œSee that cow barn over there?”

β€œI didn’t.”

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingWilliamVI
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the rat say when he saw a bat?

β€œOh my!! I just saw an angel!!”

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
🚨︎ report
How come when women use chemicals to remove polish no one bats an eye

But when hitler does it the whole world is against him?

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WattoNUFC
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Bat-problem

Robin: Batman, Batman, there is a problem with the Batmobile, it does not start.

Batman: Must be the battery.

Robin: What is a tery????

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/geekcommunicant
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Batman is a fruit bat.

I saw him eating a bananananananananananananana!

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ridley_Himself
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2018
🚨︎ report
Me: Dad I have bats in my attic

Dad: baseball or softball?

Real life encounter with my dad. The legends are true. Dad jokes prevail.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crisp-high-five
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you explain getting hit with a baseball bat made of sound?

It Hertz.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pepisboi420
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Things were not looking well for the elk and the bat that were in hospital after a car accident

They were hanging on to deer life

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaledonianWarrior
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What three things are most important to bats about their local real estate?

Echolocation Echolocation Echolocation

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChrisCGCThree
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the bat/donkey hybrid?

It's pretty bat-ass!

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tippydaug
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2017
🚨︎ report
I hit my friend with a baseball bat

He couldn't look me in the eye after what I did

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
🚨︎ report
A wild bat bit me, so I bit him back..

As they say.. "Bit for Bat"

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/music_snobbbb
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Target359
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2018
🚨︎ report
What kind of bats swing upside down?

Acro-bats!

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnyeChan
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2018
🚨︎ report
The bat(h)mobile
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/elvisspringsteen
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2018
🚨︎ report
Two vampire bats in a cave, one goes out in search of fresh blood in the local village, and comes back with a face covered in red blood. His friend says "what did you eat to get all that?" The first bat replies:

"You see that steeple on that church over there? Yeah, I hit it."

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/palpameme_66
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2018
🚨︎ report

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