I gave away all of my batteries yesterday.
And the best part, it was free of charge!
I noticed 2 large bumps on my car battery.
I had them tested and one came back positive. Google says it’s terminal.
Yesterday I met Sally, a young woman who operates a battery kiosk at our local community park.
Sally sells C-cells by the Seesaw.
I bought some dead batteries
The other day I saw a bucket at the hardware store with a sign that said: dead batteries - $1 each.
I thought to myself “these should be free of charge”.
I just gave away my dead batteries
The store near me is having a sale on batteries.
If you buy two packs, they'll throw in a pack of dead ones, free of charge.
I put batteries in a mouse
For some reason I was kicked out of the pet store
As we turned down the street I told my kids to bring batteries.
I then pointed to the “no outlet” sign.
Why did Jon Snow need a new battery?
A car battery was arrested by the cops for causing trouble at the bar
But they had to let him go, they couldn’t find anything to charge him with.
My phone was showing "Battery low". So I placed it on top of the cupboard.
It worked. Can't see the notification any more.
I gave all my dead batteries away today...
I love it when I restock the battery drawer
It just feels nice to have all this power.
I wrote a story about someone who is experiencing angst about buying batteries:
Robin: “The Batmobil isn’t starting!” Batman: “Did you charge the battery?”
Robin: “What the hell is a tery?”
Dad tried to invent a new lithium-ion battery.
But he failed, because he wasn't Goodenough.
Did you hear about the man who got the death sentence for eating a battery?
He was electrically charged
When you are in charge of the twitter account during national battery day
Have you read the book batteries not included by:
Anybody want some dead batteries?
How did the battery know the letter was for him?
It was addressed to current resident!
This Corona Virus pandemic has caused my local shop to start stocking dead batteries
I saw some dead batteries at a yard sale.
When I asked how much, the lady said they were free of charge.
What did the Lithium ion battery say to the Zinc-Carbon battery?
I just saw a AAA battery-delivery truck run a red light. Hope he doesn't get charged.
I gave away all my used batteries today.
I once came across some dead batteries...
They were all free of charge!
I just grabbed a few dead batteries...
They were free of charge!
You should know you can help to recycle dead batteries and return them in most supermarkets
I was checking out at the grocery store and the cashier didn’t put the batteries in the same bag with my food and I said it’s cool go ahead and put them in the same bag I don’t care he looked at me with a straight face and said…
Is that how you get your electrolytes?
So, I was on the train the other day, and you know how it takes a while to get to the city, well my phone battery was flat and I didn't have a book, so I was a bit bored, but then I realised that there is all this cool graffiti on the tunnel walls... and um... so my phone was dead... and.. the city?
Oh darn it! I lost my train of thought.
My battery died when I was recording my wife giving a toast at her parents’ 50th wedding anniversary.
Now I’m never going to hear the end of it.
Why are dead batteries free?
Cause they're free of charge
I've been giving away dead batteries
Why did the king eat a bunch of batteries?
I'm Ambivalent about Batteries
They have their positives and negatives.
So a dead battery walks into a bar and orders a drink. He asks the bartender how much.
My brother let me keep his phone, which ran out of battery
If a battery is dead does that mean it is current ly not working.
I kind of thought it was a positive joke.
Saw a sign at the store that said "used batteries"
I'm guessing they were free of charge.
What do a dead battery and a maxed out credit card have in common?
They both decline the charges
R: "Batman, the batmobile is making a clicking sound and won't start." BM: "Check the battery."
Police arrested two boys today. One was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks.
They charged one, and let the other one off.
Went to buy batteries today
When you mix a salt and water, you get a solution. When you mix a salt and battery, you get...
I recently read somewhere that there’s actually no battery acid in your iPhone’s battery...
It’s powered by Apple juice.
A police officer caught two kids playing with a firework and a car battery.
He charged one and let the other one off.
I gave my neighbour my dead car battery today...
A donkey walks into a bar with a battery pack on his back.
Bartender says "I dont mind the long face but dont you start nothing"
The energizer bunny was arrested for battery.
This joke keeps going and going.
Edit; Did you hear...? The energizer bunny was charged with battery.
Got bamboozled by a guy giving away batteries.
Or maybe not? After all, he did say they were free of charge.
The battery in my remote died.
I guess you could say my battery had a terminal illness.
For Sale. Old batteries, free of charge.
After he had completed the "Potato Battery" project in school...
...my father decided that he was going to create a new potato breed that could be utilized for bigger electrical needs and he planned to change the world. After much trial and error, he ended up cross-breeding a new hybrid potato that was powerful enough to be used in a car!
After much thought, he decided to name his new potato breed....
"Alter-tator"
The end of my battery has corrosion...
Giving away my old car battery.
I sympathize with batteries
I’m never included in anything either.
My dad gave away all of his dead batteries today
What do they put in IPhone batteries?
What do you call it when batteries speak with each other?
How much do dead batteries cost?
Nothing, they’re free of charge.
I get how batteries feel because I’m rarely included in things too.
Did you hear about the store giving away empty batteries? They were free of charge?
My battery was at 101%, Sorry, I Had To Make It.
Whenever my friend walks into a room, he has this weird habit of taking the batteries out of all the clocks.
He claims he can stop it at any time.
How much does a dead battery cost?
Why do batteries feel lonely?
Because they are never included in anything.
Is that battery used? Na, it’s...
Yesterday I met Sally, a young woman who operates a battery kiosk at our local community park.
Sally sells C-cells by the Seesaw.
Today I gave my dead batteries away
They were free of charge.
Have you read the book batteries not included...
I gave all of my dead batteries away today.
I gave all my dead batteries away today...
I gave all my dead batteries away today…
A police caught two kids one was playing with a battery and one was playing with a firework.
He charged one and let the other one off.
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