I tried donating blood today... NEVER AGAIN!!! Too many questions.

Like, "Who's blood is this?", "How did you get it?"

"Why is it in a bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TwoMoreDays
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2021
🚨︎ report
I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B negative πŸ€·πŸΌβ€β™€οΈ
πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlexxFruit
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2021
🚨︎ report
A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood.

The nurse asked the rabbit: "What's your blood type?"

"I'm probably a Type O", said the rabbit.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2021
🚨︎ report
You know what really makes my blood boil?!

Crematoriums.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eternal_Punshine
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2021
🚨︎ report
A pastor, a priest, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank, and the nurse asks what blood type they are.

The rabbit says, β€œI’m probably a Type-O”

πŸ‘︎ 614
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rmath12
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs lying in a pool of blood?

An ambulance.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Happy_Each_Day
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call Batman's blood vessels?

Bruce Vein

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ssr0203
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a blood that wears blue?

A Hypocrip

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fr33b1scu1ts
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2021
🚨︎ report
A priest, A Baptist minister, and a rabbit go into a red cross to donate blood. The nurse asks "What is your blood type"?

The rabbit says "I think I'm a type O"

πŸ‘︎ 308
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMeeme
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the potato cough up blood?

Because it had tuber-culosis

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazytacoman4
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Today I found out that you can actually hear the blood flowing through your veins.

You just have to listen varicosely.

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
There’s a city where all the people have the same blood type

The capital of Taiwan. They’re all Taipai.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAverageSJW
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a tree that sucks blood?

A country (Count-tree)

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Esmeralda_i
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2021
🚨︎ report
My dad died when we couldn't remember his blood type

As he died, he kept insisting "be positive", but it's hard without him.

πŸ‘︎ 20k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the blood transfusion?

It was all in vain

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/p_tally
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
🚨︎ report
Lil Nas X sold his sole to make these nike shoes with a drop of human blood
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/90210Rager
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2021
🚨︎ report
I went to donate blood and the clinician asked, β€˜Would you like to lay down?’

I told them I was inclined to it.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dencolab
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2021
🚨︎ report
It is rumored that the worst secretaries have typo blood.
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CatsCreepMeowt
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
🚨︎ report
What Do You Call a Russian with Low Blood/Oxygen Content?

Hammer and Sickle Cell Anemic!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
🚨︎ report
A scientist discovered the null blood type (type 0) in 1901

I guess there was a typo

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tawawt88
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2021
🚨︎ report
My uncle died last week because the doctors couldn't figure out his blood type.

At least my uncle was being supportive as he kept on yelling, "Be positive!"

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notelonmusk__
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
🚨︎ report
My grandfather died because the report said he had Type A blood.

Unfortunately it was a Type-O.

πŸ‘︎ 221
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2021
🚨︎ report
What do bloods call their guns?

Criptonite

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/s3Nq
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
🚨︎ report
What blood type does an optimist have?

A…B positive

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlGeee
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
🚨︎ report
A red blood cell was travelling through the bloodstream...

It bumped into another cell and screamed "Jesus Christ!!" God was not happy, he said "You should never use the Lords name in vein."

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordoftheClouds00
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
I once dated a phlebotomist whom, when she tried to draw my blood, said "Be positive."

It was then I realized, she wasn't my type.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Venomenace
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
🚨︎ report
In the movie Inside Out, what is Joy’s blood type?

B+

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Char0626
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
🚨︎ report
Dialysis is a blood bath.
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rebaloisesays
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
🚨︎ report
Blood and Organ related puns please

So a colleague is leaving my work (transfusion medicine lab) to work as an information manager for the organ transplant service. I make cards and I’m trying to think up something punny to write on/in his card and I’ll paint a picture on the front for context. I was thinking like β€œbloody good luck” or β€œsorry you’re transplanting”... but less shitty!

Thanks in advance :)

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Massive-Lock-6048
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
🚨︎ report
Need donors for my phone's blood transfusion.

Looking for a type-o.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iMakeCrap
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2021
🚨︎ report
On what type of plate does Dracula get his blood soup served on?

On a plate-let

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deadly_R
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Grandpa died because we couldn’t figure out his blood type.

At least he told us to be positive.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ReineDeTaBite
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I realized today the life of a blood cell is truly futile..

After all, it lives its whole life in vein

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobby_pendragon
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Why is the doctor at the blood bank picky about her dates?

She has A type

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cresendo77
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
In which era did the half demon bloods exist?

Medieval era

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Artisticspawm
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walked into a blood donation clinic

The nurse asked the rabbit: "what is your blood type?" "I'm probably a type O" said the rabbit.

πŸ‘︎ 155
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tadashi4
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
🚨︎ report
A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walked in to a blood donation clinic.

The nurse asked the rabbit: "What is your blood type?"

"I am probably a type O" said the rabbit.

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mick_NYC
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you know you can actually listen to the blood in your veins?

You just have to listen varicosely

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EggNogAgenda
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
A priest, a minister and a rabbit walk into a blood donor centre...

The nurse asks the rabbit what blood type he is.

The rabbit replies "I think I'm a type O"

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Yankee9Niner
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2021
🚨︎ report
Priest, vicar and rabbit go to give blood.

Dr β€œ what blood type are you rabbit?”

To which the rabbit replies,

Rabbit β€œ probably a Type-O”

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DubberOrNothing
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2021
🚨︎ report
I live by my blood type

Be positive

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Giraffeeti
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2021
🚨︎ report
A monk, a priest, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.

Rabbit says β€œI think I’m a type O”

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/B1RDS-ARENT-REAL
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
🚨︎ report
My blood test result said my blood type was type A

But it was a typo.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2021
🚨︎ report
My dad died when we couldn’t remember his blood type

As he died he kept on insisting for us to β€œbe positive”, but it’s hard without him.

πŸ‘︎ 105
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CubbyK
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
My grandfather died because the report said he had Type A blood

Turns out it was a Type-O

πŸ‘︎ 167
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Russell_Pinto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
A priest an imam and a rabbit walk into a blood bank

The rabbit says, "I think I might be a type O."

πŸ‘︎ 113
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnooRobots9182
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
A priest a minister and a rabbit walk into a blood bank

The rabbit says I think I'm a type-o

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tjeters
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank...

The rabbit says, β€œI think I might be type o.”

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jigglytep
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
🚨︎ report

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