The other night I tried to kill a vampire with a really big pointy stick, but my aim was terrible.

It was a giant missed stake.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jzerene
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What a good aim
πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/raysawma
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Explains why people don’t have the best aim
πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aziz_a22
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I met a Buddhist monk who refused anaesthetic during his root canal surgery. His aim?

Transcend dental medication

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CasualAustralian
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
🚨︎ report
"An apple a day keep the doctor away" they say, but only if you have good aim.
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/geekcommunicant
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I miss my SO a lot. I end up kissing and hugging thin air and she says it makes me look ridiculous. How do I recalibrate my aim? (r/fifthworldproblems) reddit.com/r/fifthworldpr…
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBadger40
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Anyone can fly, as long as they have really bad aim

You just need to throw yourself at the ground - and miss.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/td941
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2019
🚨︎ report
My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving
πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/moses10960
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2017
🚨︎ report
My aim is to maybe be more specific one of these days.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2019
🚨︎ report
What will you say when Che Guevara aims a tree and misses it?

Chemistry

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/harikrishnan_s
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the one about the baseball pitcher with terrible aim?

Never mind it'll fly over your head

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Exploits_R_Lyfe
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2018
🚨︎ report
Why do pterodactyls aim towards the outside of the toilet when it's late at night?

To make the "p" silent

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBeaverDoctor
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Can a ninja aim precisely?

surehecan

πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2017
🚨︎ report
What do you think about the track and field event, where the aim is to throw a circular heavy disc further than the other competitors?

..Discus

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2014
🚨︎ report
Last month I launched a book aimed at children.

I’m pleased to say I hit one of them

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rfcoc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Bit of a long shot...

but does anyone know a sniper?

πŸ‘︎ 265
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πŸ‘€︎ u/adfunk101
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
🚨︎ report
Gravity Falls has the best puns
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/IRONGOD2020
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
This administration is aiming to put a woman on the moon by 2024

Boobs on the moon 2024

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I never tried using a gun ever before...

I'm planning to give it a shot, though.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperFeather0
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Should’ve aimed better
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TNMYSNGL
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I miss my ex...

But my aim is getting much better.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
🚨︎ report
American School shooting jokes tend to be aimed at the younger audience.
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigni44a
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Aimed at a younger audience
πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notrueme
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My ex wife still misses me....

But, her aim is getting better.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
Why is it easier to take an F-150 across a river than a Silverado?

Bc no one ever Chevy’d a river

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/psykotic24
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
If there’s one thing that always makes me throw up...

It’s a dart board on the ceiling

πŸ‘︎ 278
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jweber96
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I've designed a tea brand aimed at Jewish Men

Hebrews

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Flumpf_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2018
🚨︎ report
A pitcher kept aiming slightly to the side and hitting the batter

no one got their lemonade and the cake was ruined

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ“…︎ May 31 2016
🚨︎ report
Last week I launched a book aimed at 9 12 year olds.

I am proud to say I hit one of them

-Gary delaney

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Elrond_Halfelven
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
🚨︎ report
The greatest baseball player ever was a guy named Hugh McBealy, and he was most famous for every single time he came to the plate knocking the ball high over right field and into the stands.

He scored a home run every single at bat, and always the exact same way. Way over right field, too high for anyone to reach, and it always landed in exactly the 17th row of the stands, give or take a couple feet.

He earned the nickname β€œthe machine” for how consistently he hit the exact same spot every time. Right field, 17th row, every single time. He did this for 20 years before he retired. Tickets to the 2-3 seats that the ball always landed on sold for over $2k a pop by the time he retired because you were guaranteed at least a couple home run balls.

And the day he retired a reporter asked him β€œHow does it feel to be retiring as the greatest hitter of all time?”

Hugh just looked at the reporter puzzled. β€œWhat do you mean?” He said.

The reporter clarified β€œliterally over 5,000 times you went to the plate and hit a home run to right field, 17th row of the stands!”

Hugh looked dejected and disappointed β€œyeah, my greatest failure...”

β€œWhat do you mean?” Said the reporter incredulously.

Hugh let’s out a long sigh, and looked down at the ground quietly for a moment before finally speaking.

β€œI’ve been aiming left this whole time”

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Frnklfrwsr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My ex-wife still misses me...

BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!!

(gravity falls, anyone?)

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/slimothyjames1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you call a grateful crocodile?

An arigator

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MathenThenseph
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
🚨︎ report
I was gonna try out archery

But theres too many drawbacks

πŸ‘︎ 767
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Demarcus-Xavier
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Found in the wild
πŸ‘︎ 85
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JMthekid
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving.
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mhayes69123
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My ex-wife still misses me

But her aim is starting to improve.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Merlin-5
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
🚨︎ report
My ex wife still misses me.

But her aim is getting better!

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/reddit_reddit03
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
She missed you

But her aim is getting better!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AdamTheMango
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
My ex-wife still misses me

But her aim is getting better

πŸ‘︎ 70
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ttttteefhuyhttfff
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
🚨︎ report
My ex-wife still misses me

But her aim is getting better!

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TitaniumPeak
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
My ex wife still misses me

but her aim is getting better

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
🚨︎ report
My ex wife still misses me

But her aim is getting better!,

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sharpshooter228
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report

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