Reached my goal for today
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rlaff5
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27
🚨︎ report
The goal of every burglar is a stainless steal.
πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/churniglow
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
🚨︎ report
Marriage goal
πŸ‘︎ 95
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yugvijay
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29
🚨︎ report
Sibling goals
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Devanshi1618
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report
At one time, I had a strongly desired goal of owning a plumbing supply company...

I guess it was just a pipe dream.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
What is a dolphin’s ultimate goal in life?

To find his porpoise.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sothg
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02
🚨︎ report
Why is the Barcelona goal keeper always cleaning up?

Because his teammate is a little Messi

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stevehrowe2
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04
🚨︎ report
Relationship Goals imgflip.com/i/3lwn11
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nike2022
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12
🚨︎ report
I made it a goal to become a legal citizen of Finland.

And I am not going to quit until I am Finish!

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jmahler0514
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01
🚨︎ report
My 2020 New Year's resolution is to finish my 2019 resolution. My goal was to lose 10 lbs.

Only 25 pounds to go!

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Talon184
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
🚨︎ report
My goals for the future....
πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/my_kneegrows1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a woman standing between two goal posts?

Anette

πŸ‘︎ 75
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rbatts94
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Same applies if she stops footballs from going in the goal
πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doctordoom55
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Punt or kick the field goal?
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/doghaircut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2019
🚨︎ report
If a person named Chrysler tries to tackle you, your main goal would be to Dodge Chrysler's Ram

( Had to post here because removed by bot on r/showerthoughts )

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CIA_OFFICIAL_L
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2019
🚨︎ report
A Buddhist refused anaesthetic during a root canal procedure. His goal?

Transcend dental medication.

πŸ‘︎ 78
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πŸ‘€︎ u/InfidelCastrato
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does Pepsi always achieve its goals?

It’s soda termined

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2019
🚨︎ report
My three goals for 2019:
  1. Stop making lists
  2. Learn how to count
πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScottyUrb
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Relationship Goals
πŸ‘︎ 173
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Croxsy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2018
🚨︎ report
Why doesn’t the blind person have any life goals

He has no one to look up to

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Life_Sack
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2019
🚨︎ report
#Goals
πŸ‘︎ 530
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DawnOfArkham
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2017
🚨︎ report
If a girl is preventing you from reaching your goal...

Then she's a keeper.

πŸ‘︎ 168
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fatandsalt
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2018
🚨︎ report
A writer on The Good Place submitted the following list of restaurant name puns with the script for her episode. It includes gems like "Squab Goals" and "Pie Another Day." twitter.com/meganamram/st…
πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call 90 year old named Jeremy that's scored 3 goals?

Jerry Hat-Trick

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NiceHouseGoodTea
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Every year, dads hold a competition to see who can make it rain. Their goal is to have someone win 2 years in a row

He would be the reigning Raining champ

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Clay00000
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2019
🚨︎ report
I made it a goal to become a legal citizen of Finland and I’m not gonna quit til I’m Finish
πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jmahler0514
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2019
🚨︎ report
I have a goal to stop being over ambitious.

I hope to hit it by tomorrow.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/battybat05
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
🚨︎ report
My goal was to build a fort for each letter of the alphabet, but I was only able to build the first six.

What’s important is that I made an F Fort.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2018
🚨︎ report
Bae goals <3
πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/backwoodzz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2017
🚨︎ report
Nice goals
πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cbrownathan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2017
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mairiphinc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2017
🚨︎ report
Did you know there’s a middle aged women only activist group who’s goal is to literally stop all men?

They call themselves β€˜Menopause.’

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tristanio97
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2018
🚨︎ report
I have 3 goals in life

I suck at hockey

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kiillerman2
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2016
🚨︎ report
I Asked My Dad What His Goal Was

Response: To live for ever, or die trying.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ellgramar
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2017
🚨︎ report
I finally achived my lifelong goal of climbing to the top of Everest...

But since then it's all been down hill...

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spartanyoej
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2016
🚨︎ report
My law professor used to be a field goal kicker in college...

"Me and my buddy were going to go pro but we couldn't play because we had sinus problems....

No one would sign us up."

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/daproudfoot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2013
🚨︎ report

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