During covid, my orthodontist told my I should tend to my teeth by myself.
“How?” I asked.
He said “Brace yourself.”
TIL that scientists have proven people tend to be more prideful in during summertime...
...because pride cometh before the fall.
People tend to be buried underground because...
They feel like it has a deeper meaning.
When single ladies get to the age of 50, they tend to get lots of cats.
This phenomenon is known as many paws
Ever notice bankers tend to keep to themselves?
They're loaners by nature.
American School shooting jokes tend to be aimed at the younger audience.
People tend to not be too fond of the movie Ferngully, but I think it just has a bat rap
The Rev. Spooner got the world Poker champion in to tend his vegetable plants.
He was told to 'Weed 'em and reap'
What do you call a bird that tends to it's lawn?
People tend to be shocked when they find out what a bad electrician I am.
I tend not to like orange cars with flags on the roof.
My daughter told me dogs tend to pile up when it comes to this ice cream.
How does Father Christmas tend to his garden?
Q: Which of your senses tend to diminish as you get older?
A new study has found that white envelopes tend to be delivered faster than envelopes of any other colour
I guess you could say that there's...
white mail privilege
Someone that tends to chickens is a real life chicken tender.
Shakespeare was hired by a theater to tend patrons' horses...
How did Shakespeare learn all about his new employer?
During its onbarding process.
Perfume companies tend to get wrongly accused of laundering money.
But their business is in a scent
Lately, my wife has been complaining that I tend not to
What do you say when Ed Sheeran tends to you?
I tend to give money to homeless people, who I find sleeping on the grass, on a winter morning.
I always give credit where it's dew.
Really constipated people tend to keep their friends close...
...and their enemas even closer.
The problems for this bear just tend to pylon. (sorry for possible repost)
imgur.com/vFszd0m
Have you ever wondered why beekeepers tend to have such nice eyes?
Beauty is in the eye of the beeholder
Why do baseball bats tend to break near the grip on Saturdays and Sundays?
Because it's the weekend.
I learned today that melons tend to have big family weddings.
The idea that government tends to become too big and inefficient is a self-fulfilling profligacy.
Why do significant people tend to be fat?
Because the more mass they have, the more they matter.
Tyrion Lannister tends to gamble his meat and mead while sitting on tall stool...
That way the steaks are higher.
When I can't decide which dessert to get, I tend to go with fruit flavored ice cream.
My friends don't like it when I play Mario Kart with them. I tend to drive them crazy.
I tend to be the butt of everyone's jokes
My wife says it's because I'm an ass
Guy used to be in the army. Real good looking guy too. Blond hair, tall, blue eyes. But now tends to sick animals, helping to diagnose and treat them so they can get better.
So, I tend to over-share when I drink ....
I think I have vowel incontinence.
My dad tends to stare (as they do) when I ask him what he's looking at he has two standard responses:
"Puzzle with a nose in it"
or
"I dunno, the label fell off"
When single women get to the age of 50, they tend to acquire lots of cats and dogs.
This phenomenon is known as many paws.
Someone that tends to chickens is a real life chicken tender
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