My addiction to refrigerated poultry has gone too far

I'm quitting cold turkey

πŸ‘︎ 598
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hugh_McMan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RoymondRoy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
🚨︎ report
A guy at school kept hitting me with poultry...

I got goose bumps

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cwwspurs
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call mean poultry?

A jerk chicken!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ggfchl
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
🚨︎ report
I stopped eating poultry.

I gave up cold turkey.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2020
🚨︎ report
The Pilgrim's Pride CEO plead "not guilty" today in a poultry price-fixing case

What a chicken.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/badenglishihave
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I think I'm addicted to eating poultry from the fridge

Looks like I'm going to have to quit cold turkey.

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kingcasel
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I just need dad joke enthusiasts to know that the International Poultry Meat Congress is held in Turkey this year.
πŸ‘︎ 67
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PhilipGlassEye
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2019
🚨︎ report
It is with deepest regret that I have to inform you all, my poultry dating site will be closing down,

as I can no longer make hens meet!

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2018
🚨︎ report
Apparently made with conservative poultry.
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Spyrulfyre
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Mr. Jones loses his poultry and drove of pigs in a vicious coyote attack one night.

Upon hearing the news, his neighbours and other farm owners decide to chip in to help him through a tough time.

With high hopes and heavy pockets, they reach Mr. Jones' farmhouse, only to see him merrily sipping lemonade on the porch. Confused, a person from the horde asks him, "Aren't you devastated?"

To which the farmer says,

No ham, no fowl

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/theswarthyknight
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2018
🚨︎ report
My poultry business isn’t doing so well, my chicken account is almost at zero.

lol

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fus_ro_derrp
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2018
🚨︎ report
My Jamaican friend invited me to his poultry farm

The second I arrived his chickens started to attack me.

He fought them off and said, β€œSorry about them. They’re jerk chickens.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ToroZuzuX
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a successful, wealthy poultry farmer?

A chick magnate

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/itsmoolla
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2017
🚨︎ report
I really can't stand poultry seasoning.

It just smells so fowl.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/carnageraiser
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2017
🚨︎ report
What dating app does poultry use?

Chicken Tinder.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tyburskii
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2017
🚨︎ report
Poultry in motion.

Co-worker and I were talking about his contract here, and if he's heard anything about the position here at work. He told me he hasn't, but that he has some other interviews coming up.

"I don't want to keep all my eggs in one basket" he tells me.

"That's right." I reply. "You should keep them in the fridge so they don't spoil!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TrainAss
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2016
🚨︎ report
My friend was addicted to eating frozen poultry

He quit cold turkey

πŸ‘︎ 63
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Huardy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2018
🚨︎ report
I gave up eating deli meat poultry

I quit cold turkey

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HPAP
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2018
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.