What do you do when your Bluetooth device doesn't pair?
You repair it...
(Sorry I will show myself out)
Did you hear about the optician who made the biggest pair of glasses in the world?
Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains!
Well just calm down and pull yourself together.
Do u know how the roman empire was cut in half?-------How?-------With a pair of Caesars!!!!
I always bring an extra pair of pants golfing...
...just in case I get a hole in one.
What is a synonym for a pair of shoes?
What do you call a smart pair of pants?
I bought a pair of shoes from this drug dealer yesterday
I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping the whole day.
A pair of jumper cables walks into a bar
The bartender said "I'll serve you, BUT DON'T START ANYTHING!"
Why did the distance runner buy a new pair of shoes?
It would be helpful in the long run.
Which TV show pair has the best chemistry?
Walter White and Jesse Pinkman.
I bought a new pair of gloves today...
...but they're both "lefts". Which on the one hand is great, but on the other, it's just not right.
I recently bought a new pair of Orpothedic shoes
Doctor: No, it's pronounced 'Orthopedic'
Me: Ah, I stand corrected
Why does a golfer always wear two pairs of pants?
In case he gets a hole in one.
What do you call a pair of docs?
Vin Diesel should commission a heraldic crest under his first name, a pair of snakes intertwined with fangs bared...
How do you optimize a pair brainstorm?
You blow into you partners ear
Son: Dad what are you going to do today? Dad: Well first I'm going to get a pair of glasses. Son: And after that?
If you go golfing, make sure to wear two pair of pants
In case you get a hole in one
I have a joke about a dull pair of scissors ...
But I’m afraid it ain’t gonna cut it.
Mom: Put a pair of normal shorts on.
Son: No I don’t like ghosts.
An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants.
‘’Euripides’’ says the tailor. ‘’Yeah, Eumenides?’’ replies the man.
Maybe a pair would be enough.
If you throw a pair of fins in water, they'll float. But if you throw one Fin in the water
I’ve been wanting to go ice skating for a while. My friends bought me a pair of skates recently, but they broke on the first use!
If you ask me, they’re cheapskates.
No one laughs at my “bring an extra pair of pants when you go golfing” joke.
I guess “hole-in-one” jokes are sub-par.
I was surprised about a pair of sunglasses on the road today
I got them for free, but that's way below street value
A pair of underwear walked into the bar, ordered a drink, and began to tell the bartender a story. He went on and on and on.
The bartender interrupted him and said, "Hey can you make this brief?"
To save money I made myself a pair of glasses out of 2 old ketchup bottles.
In Heinz-sight I should have just bought a proper pair
I have an ugly, tight pair of shorts that I only wear when every other pair is dirty.
They’re my last re-shorts!
I had to get a new pair of scissors today
The old ones just weren't cutting it
I have a pair of slip-on sandals for housework and another pair of slip-on sandals for yardwork.
I refer to them as my In-slides and my Out-slides.
What do you call a pair of backup AirPods?
This is (practically) the corniest gift imaginable. At the bottom of the soon to be gift wrapped box of corniness was a pair of Korn tickets for my lady...who enjoys my corny puns.
What do you call a pair of shoes ?
Why did the golfer have an extra pair of trousers?
In case he got a hole in one!
Why do golfers wear 2 pairs of pants
In case they get a hole in one
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer.
I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.
Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains.
Doctor:- Pull your self together!
Why do golfers wear two pairs of socks ?
In case they get a hole in one !
I took two pairs of socks golfing
In case I got a hole in one
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
In case they get a hole in one.
I always take an extra pair of socks when I go golfing
In case I get a hole in one
Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains
Doctor: Then pull yourself together
Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
A: In case he got a hole in one.
Why do younever buy a pair of shoes from a drug dealer?
Because you don't know what he laces them with and you'll be tripping all day.
Whenever I go golfing, I bring an extra pair of pants
Just in case I get a hole in one
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