I hired an ex-pilot to do some painting in my house
He's actually pretty good! He made a great job of the landing.
My ex wife has started dating an Italian bricklayer.
She said, "It's cement to be...."
I gave my ex wife my old vacuum
Jokes on her the thing really sucked
What do you call an ex-military rolling around in spices?
I accidentally butt dialed my ex last night.
I swear it’s the only booty call I’ve ever made.
After I was arrested, my ex-wife decided to hang a picture of my mugshot on the wall in her living room.
But she still won't admit she framed me.
My ex wife still misses me.
But her aim is getting better!
I knocked up my ex-girlfriend.
Though I'm being told that's not how I should announce my wife's pregnancy.
My ex made my life like a fairy tale.
My ex actually has 3 spirit animals:
My Ex-wife called me to tell me my son was arrested for setting a house on fire. I corrected her saying...
I always tell people, my ex-wife has my sense of humor
That witch took everything of mine
I tried to remarry my ex-wife, but She figured out that I was only..
My ex left me because I was determined to buy van and sell spaghetti out of the back, she told me it wouldn’t work
Should have seen her face when I drove pasta
Why couldn't the crocodile get over his ex wife?
He was stuck in de Nile :(
My ex-wife still misses me...
BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!!
(gravity falls, anyone?)
My ex girlfriend just left me for a ghost named Kevin.
She's no longer my ghoul friend.
(this actually happened, i just wanted to make the situation lighter)
Trans X Men, call it "Ex-Men"
My ex didn't appreciate my sense of humour
She wanted me to quit making so many jokes. She thought it would de-pun our relationship
What did the train conductor use to murder his ex-wife?
Investigators aren't sure yet, but they discovered he had a loco motive.
I was going to make a joke about my ex...
My ex's motto: "If it ain't broke..."
My ex hated language, so I had to dump her.
I couldn't be with someone who was anti-semantic.
I recently broke up with my ex. She hated how bad at directions I am.
So one day, I just packed up my bags and right.
I had an ex-gf who was so strong she could juggle her mom
She was mother flipping strong.
What do you call an ugly photo of Angelina Jolie's ex-husband?
Sure, Poe Dameron is a handsome ex-smuggler, but he's not the only one
My girlfriend is constantly getting angry at me for texting my ex’s
The weird thing is she could care less when I text my O’s
My ex told me she was watching the "Peaky Blenders". So here we are...
Both my ex and I were born in July
She said I was a crab.
I said she was cancer.
I’m seriously thinking about re-marrying my ex-wife, but I’m pretty sure she’ll figure out...
...I’m just after my money.
My ex wife drowned in coffee
Terrible way to go, but I'm just glad it was instant
Today was a terrible day. First my ex got hit by a bus.
Then I lost my job as a driver.
I stole my ex girlfriend’s wheelchair
Guess who came crawling back
Why did the pirate get back with his Ex?
Because that’s where he buried his treasure.
I ran into my ex girlfriend at the gym.
I saw my ex girlfriend standing on the opposite side of the museum hall, and I was too self conscious to say hello.
There was so much history between us.
My wife is mad that I keep introducing her as “my ex-girlfriend”
My ex still misses me
But their aim is starting to improve
My ex-wife still misses me
But her aim is getting better
My ex wife still misses me
but her aim is getting better
My ex-wife still misses me
But her aim is getting better!
My ex wife still misses me
But her aim is getting better!,
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
