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When she arrived at the zoo she went to see her manager and asked what she should do, the manager told her to first go feed the sharks, so she went off to feed them. Whilst she was shovelling the food into the pool a shark jumped out of the water and tried to bite her, as a reflex she hit the shark with the spade and the shark died. Worried about losing her job this soon the woman started brainstorming what to do, eventually she decided to feed the dead shark to the lions thereby removing all evidence and so that is what she did. Shaken but glad she had avoided detection the women went back to see her manager and asked if there was anything else that needed doing, she was told to go and clean out the monkey cage.. So off the woman went with a wheelbarrow and shovel to clean out the cage, as she was shovelling the poop into the barrow a monkey jumped down from the tree towards her! As a reflex reaction the women smashed the monkey with the spade and it lay dead. Thankfully she knew just what to do and so she threw the monkey into the lion cage. Shaken and ready to go home by now, the women went to see if there were any final jobs that needed doing: she was tasked with collecting the honey from the bees. So she got changed into her protective gear however she forgot to tuck in the back of her shirt so when it came to doing the bees, one particularly large bee came and stung her right on the behind! The woman screamed and started whacking the bees until many lay dead. By now she didn’t even have to think.. she collected the dead bees and threw them in the lion cage before going home for a quiet evening.
The next day there was a new lion in the lion cage. The new lion said to the other lions “so what’s the food like here??” The other lions responded...
“Actually it’s quite good. Yesterday we had FISH, CHIMPS and MUSHY BEES!”
copilot: they keep your shirt closed
.........I wonder when will my neighbour pay her bill?
My boss is going to be so mad when he finds out about this double-cross.
He replies “I know, this sub is full of reposts”
A McDouble
I said it was because it was a calcu-later.
I guess you could say I had a near deaf experience.
It's like I'm seeing things in a different light
It was a real pair of dimes shift for me.
She exclaimed "God! This is ridiculous. I need, like, four arms to do this!".
To which I replied "but honey, you DO have forearms!"
and now I am eggsausted
As I descended down the adjacent, working escalator I noticed the man tapping his screwdriver impatiently at the bottom; looking around as if he were waiting for something. I couldn't resist...
>Me: "Do you have everything you need to fix it?"
>
>Him: "No!" <looking frustrated>
>
>Me: "Well, have you tried escalating?!"
In about half a second the man's face erupted in a smile while he proceeded to laugh so loudly that he startled himself and a woman nearby who gasped, turning to look at him. Somewhere behind me a woman unleashed a loud, "Ha!" as well.
I smiled all the way to my designated boarding gate =D
I guess you could say it was a Laissez-Faire
A guy drops off a specimen behind me and says this must be a really cool specimen. I turn around and sure enough its in a bag with an ice pack. What a great start to the shift!
It's a timeless classic
I returned to my booth from parking a car and asked the captain if I missed anything. Today has been fairly slow so he tells me that I missed the sun moving about 2 degrees across the sky. Then he says, "It was the highlight of his day."
"Got an order! Nacho chicken!" Whose is it?!
"Got an order! Nacho chicken!" We know that already!
"Got an order! Nacho chicken!" So whose is it?!
"Got an order! Nachos!" Of course not! It's the customer's!
I say that's a nice break from the usual. He says "yeah I know, only 12 hours!"
I think I really urned this job
