Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl when it goes to the washroom?

Because the P is silent

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Albettros
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
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Before going to the washroom, you’re β€˜merican. After going to the washroom, you’re β€˜merican. When you’re in the washroom...

European.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xander395
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
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You may be American when you enter the washroom and you may be American when you leave the washroom but..

When you’re in there European

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fredvanvleetsr
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
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What do you call a comedian going to the washroom?

A comic relief

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
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They put up an out of order sign on the washroom door...

Or, as they call it, a no-defecation notification.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OiTheRolk
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
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Sports channel in the men's washroom...

He is peein'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mmrtnt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2018
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What is the colour of a ghost’s washroom?

Boo-loo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodium_hater
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2018
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Found in a university washroom i.reddituploads.com/267c4…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tsands22
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2017
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Overheard a "dad joke" at a restaurant... wife gets up, presumably to go the washroom, and says.. "I will be right back." Husband replies, "thanks for the warning".
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πŸ‘€︎ u/heavym
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2014
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I have to go the washroom...

Brother: "brb dad I need to go to the washroom"

Dad: "shit happens."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/getdetayled
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2015
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My dad put bells on the washroom door

Every time someone uses the washroom he yells "I can hear you tinkling!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jobymax
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2014
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I'm on my way

My wife is 37 weeks pregnant and is scheduled to be induced this morning. She woke up last night just after midnight (I checked) to use the washroom and when she got back into bed I asked her if it was after 12 yet. She said she thought so and asked why. I told her I wanted to be the first to wish her a Happy Birth Day! She appropriately groaned then giggled, so I think I'm ready. Wish me luck!

Edit: We got him a couple hours ago! Everything went well, no complications. Thanks reddit strangers for the comments and well wishes. I know the rules say nothing identifying, 'oh when' ever they change that I'll post his name. Goodnight everyone, I have to try and nap before his feeding

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AspiringBuddhist
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
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There is 10 minutes until the wedding starts

If you need to use the washroom, go now or forever hold your pee.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/romanator25
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
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Kind of a dirtier dad joke but my dad said this when I was 12 and it was hilarious.

We were on a road trip to the cottage and we stopped at a service center to get gas, food etc.

My brother and I go to the washroom urinals and we are both taking a piss. My dad walks in the washroom and says "Oh, so this is where the dicks hang out."

I Didn't understand the pun then but I appreciate how funny it is now that I'm older.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/1337Scott
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2014
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PSA: Never take your dad to DeDutch.

Be courteous to the DeDutch waitstaff (and to yourself) this holiday season by leaving your dads at home before dining at DeDutch. Following is just a small sample of jokes that your dad WILL make after ordering his DeBratwurst from DeLunch menu on his DeClub card.

  • I have to go to DeWashroom.
  • When the waitress asks how the food is, the only responses will be either "DeLightful", or "DeLicious".
  • Pass DeSalt.
  • Make sure to leave a good Detip for the DeService!
  • You've got DeHollandaise sauce on your DeShirt!

The waitstaff will pretend to laugh every time. But secretly they die inside a little every time.

It's really quite DeSpicable.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ReddSap
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2013
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Can teachers also be dads?

When I was younger I would ask my teacher "Can I go to the washroom/bathroom?"
More often than not the response was "I don't know, can you?"

EDIT: Missed a letter.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Faable1
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2013
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Why can’t you hear a Pterodactyl go to the washroom?

Cause the P is silent.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChaseCeer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
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Why cant you hear a pterodactyl go to the washroom?

Because the "p" is silent

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AL_MASLUL81
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
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why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the washroom?

because the P is silent

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πŸ‘€︎ u/your_local_werido
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl in the washroom?

...because the 'p' is silent.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/therealkorach
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2017
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