Some idiot posted a Chinese telephone directory through my door...
It was full of Wong numbers.
ποΈ 16
π
οΈ Feb 09 2021
My 7 year old nephew showed me with pride the "telephone" he had just made from a string and two tin cans. I pulled out my iPhone and said, "That's nice, but..."
"Look at what kids your age make in China!"
ποΈ 130
π
οΈ Dec 25 2020
Iβve always wondered what itβs like to be a telephone pole...
I bet it would be electrifying
ποΈ 7
π
οΈ Dec 08 2020
Why didnβt the squirrel cross the telephone line?
ποΈ 5
π
οΈ Nov 10 2020
My friends and I tried to bypass the quarantine laws by dressing up as crows and hanging out together on top of a telephone wire
Unfortunately, someone called the police on us and we got arrested for attempted murder.
ποΈ 76
π
οΈ May 12 2020
I invented a telephone that doesn't ring.
I got the No-bell prize for it.
ποΈ 8
π
οΈ May 10 2020
How did the telephone maker propose to his girlfriend?
ποΈ 28
π
οΈ Feb 03 2020
Why did the programmer get a huge telephone bill?
Because his program was CALLING a lot of subroutines.
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Dec 15 2019
I saw people putting notes at the bottom of a telephone pole. I asked them what they were doing and one person said:
"We are putting comments under this post"
ποΈ 21
π
οΈ Apr 04 2019
What do you call it when a Tesla crashes and wraps itself around a telephone pole?
ποΈ 9
π
οΈ Oct 21 2019
What was a more important invention than the first telephone?
ποΈ 7
π
οΈ Oct 27 2019
Why did the boy telephone and the girl telephone break up?
There was just no connection...
ποΈ 9
π
οΈ Sep 12 2019
Why do birds hang out on telephone lines?
So they can tweet.
(I hit my family with this one today. Its probably been done before but it was so satisfying hearing everyone groan.)
ποΈ 6
π
οΈ Sep 08 2019
The telephone book listing read Suicidal Hotline, which I thought was a typo, so I called it.
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Oct 11 2019
My wife wants to have sex over the telephone.
The bed might be easier though.
ποΈ 30
π
οΈ Dec 03 2018
Too bad what happened to the new telephone line repairman...
Poor guy got suspended on his first day.
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Aug 26 2018
Appleβs Genius Bar is just a game of broken telephone.
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Sep 16 2018
How do you make a telephone in the jungle?
With toucans and a piece of string.
ποΈ 13
π
οΈ Mar 20 2018
Do you know how one used to call the telephone's inventor?
ποΈ 3
π
οΈ Apr 24 2017
Just had a telephone call from a researcher asking for my opinion on wind turbines.
ποΈ 54
π
οΈ Apr 08 2016
What do u call a golden retriever and telephone
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Oct 16 2017
My nephew was playing with a corded telephone and walked so far the cord was stretched out. Enter my brother-in-law
"What are you doing? Making a long distance call?"
He was so proud of the joke he called me in as the only other person who would appreciate it.
ποΈ 6
π
οΈ Oct 12 2015
Did you hear that they are not making telephone poles any longer?
Yep, and they are not makeing them any shorter either.
ποΈ 9
π
οΈ Feb 10 2015
What to say when you hear a cellphone with a classic old telephone bell ringtone ...
... "That's the phone-iest ringtone I've ever heard!"
ποΈ 4
π
οΈ Nov 27 2013
What was a more important invention than the first telephone?
ποΈ 2
π
οΈ Nov 17 2019
What was more important than the invention of the telephone?
ποΈ 15
π
οΈ Dec 17 2018
What invention was needed more than the first telephone?
ποΈ 17
π
οΈ Mar 08 2019
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