I just lost my mood ring

I can’t tell you how I feel about it

πŸ‘︎ 384
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MiggyLT
πŸ“…︎ May 07
🚨︎ report
Somebody stole my mood ring...

I still don't know how I feel about that.

πŸ‘︎ 56
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ProGamer14719
πŸ“…︎ May 24
🚨︎ report
What do you call slobber on a ring finger?

Droolry

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/m92186
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12
🚨︎ report
What has wheels and prevents water rings

A roller coaster

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jtnels0
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
🚨︎ report
"Do you know that movies about Elves, Dwarves and Hobbits where they try to destroy a ring?"

"You mean The Lord Of The Rings?"

"Yes, that's the one I'm Tolkien about."

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ May 20
🚨︎ report
I invented a telephone that doesn't ring.

I got the No-bell prize for it.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LurkyTheHatMan
πŸ“…︎ May 10
🚨︎ report
i lost my mood ring this morning

i don’t really know how to feel about that

πŸ‘︎ 100
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chickablash
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10
🚨︎ report
In case you’re thinking about getting married, consider this carefullyβ€”-on the one hand, you get to wear a pretty cool ring.

On the other hand, you don’t.

πŸ‘︎ 136
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26
🚨︎ report
There weren't a lot of hobbits in the first Lord of the Rings books.

They were just Tolkien characters.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ May 04
🚨︎ report
Someone stole my mood ring

I dont know how i feel about that

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RVK_WAFFLE
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend played golf with her friend. She lost the engagement ring I bought her in the tall grass by the fairway...

It was a diamond in the rough.

Credit (not quite the same): Frank and Ernest by Thaves for May 02, 2020

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 02
🚨︎ report
Why doesn't the bell ring at the gym?

It's a dumb-bell.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wholesome_cream
πŸ“…︎ May 02
🚨︎ report
I friend told me that the Lord of the Rings was a terrible series

I said "you don't know what you're Tolkien about."

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SilentTempestLord
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21
🚨︎ report
Ring

Recently a man had to go to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis after his girlfriend found the ring in his pants pocket and got so mad at him she stuck it on him while he was asleep. Which is worse? having your girlfriend find out you're married explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your p***s Or finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hayeshilton
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08
🚨︎ report
If you see this car, ring the police. It is stollen.
πŸ‘︎ 137
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MisterEd_ak
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I’ve been trying to start up a fighting ring of dolphins and whales

But that would defeat the whole porpoise.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Plumsby
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05
🚨︎ report
One Carrat Diamond Ring
πŸ‘︎ 72
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Emotional_Plenty
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
🚨︎ report
Pavlov is sitting at the bar, drinking a beer, when suddenly the phone rings. β€œOh shit!” he yells, jumping off the stool.

β€œI forgot to feed the dog!”

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Konamicoder
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31
🚨︎ report
Joe gave a girl a ring for Christmas

β€œMarry Christmas” He said

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/therderper123
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My boyfriend gave me a ring on Valentine's day

And he reached my voicemail

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dummina
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14
🚨︎ report
The engagement ring is purrfect πŸ’
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/skyybooper
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
Lego Lord of the Rings was a definitive moment for Tolkien fans

Up to that point they had been Legoless

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/36chambersoffun
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17
🚨︎ report
You would think the Earth is best, but the moon runs rings around it
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Barktf2
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the doorbell ring?

No? Oh, must be you acting like a ding-dong.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mikelisse
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28
🚨︎ report
Waitress at Wimpy asked us if we'd like onion rings or mozzarella sticks 'for the table'

"No thanks, I don't think the table's hungry."

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ZeldaFan812
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Lost my mood ring today

Not sure how to feel about it

πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tuba_palooza
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do phones ring?

Because they can’t speak.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/twokewl101
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I hope to one day be rich enough to buy a ring-shaped island chain formed of coral, where I can retire to relax.

I’ll call it my No Worries Atoll.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/abridgetooclose
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
Lord Of The Rings Book Reference
πŸ‘︎ 150
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MemeMaker_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2019
🚨︎ report
That’s What I’m Tolkien About: Lord of the Rings in Puns. youtu.be/5HQPyZyJYJQ
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mhighton
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Last night I dreamed I wrote β€œLord of the Rings”.

I was Tolkien in my sleep

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What if Earth had a ring like Saturn?

It wouldn't be single anymore.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chandan_2294
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
🚨︎ report
A friend and I went into business selling chess sets. During Christmas, we have to both work and ring people up at the register...

She's my check mate.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Every time the doorbell rings, my dog runs and stands in the corner.

He’s a Boxer.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I asked my wife if she'd like a new Diamond Ring to celebrate our Anniversary

"Nothing would make me happier!" She replied

- So I got her nothing

πŸ‘︎ 58
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/angster001
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2019
🚨︎ report
There are 3 rings in marriage

Engagement ring Wedding ring Suffering

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I put LEDs on her engagement ring

Her face lit up when I proposed

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/the_randomniss
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
My grandfather has a funny story he likes to tell people about how a long time ago he swallowed his wedding ring and then it came out 10 years later. I've heard him tell it many times over the years.

It's old butt gold.

πŸ‘︎ 210
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/byebyebyecycle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
There's a serious ear condition that dogs can get, it makes their ears ring all the time.

It's called Rin-Tin-Tinnitus

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GotMyOrangeCrush
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the doorbell ring?

Oh, whoops, that was just you being a ding dong.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mikelisse
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Always think hard before you get married because on one hand you have a cool ring but on the other hand you don’t
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CHEEZY_21
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
🚨︎ report
ring, ring...it's the bunn-nana phone!
πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ostrantula
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Bar talk: Dude 1: What was that song by Eric Burdon again; something about love is on fire? Dude 2: Yeah. Yeah. "Love is a burnin' thing, and it makes a fiery ring..."

Dude 3: I think it was Hotel California. "Last thing I remember, I was running for the door..."

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Saturn has a nice ring to it
πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tulikipuna
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Always think very carefully before getting married. On one hand you get to wear a cool ring, and on the other you don’t.
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CHEEZY_21
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Someone just stole my mood ring.

I don't know how I feel about that.

(Credit to 30 Rock. Thought it fit here)

πŸ‘︎ 149
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Xminus01
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Got myself a new nose ring
πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Mom: I need to remove my rings, I'm getting dermatitis

Dad: At least you aren't getting dermalooseness

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/letsgettschwifty
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Ear-rings
πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notBroseidon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Someone stole my mood ring :(

I can’t tell how I feel about that

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/waddoheck
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2019
🚨︎ report
ring ring
πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WarPlungers
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Every time my doorbell rings, my dog jumps up and stands in the corner.

He’s a Boxer.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
King of The Ring
πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jarne004
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2019
🚨︎ report
How does a matador stay safe in the ring?

They wear a bull-proof vest.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ghosttwo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Does the name "Pavlov" ring a bell?
πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lman777
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Last night I dreamt I’d written the Lord of the Rings

My wife said to me I was just Tolkien in my sleep.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OwenJthomas89
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2019
🚨︎ report
There is a deleted scene in Lord of the Rings when Bilbo and Frodo run into a long lost hipster cousin.

Douche Baggins.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife asked me to give her a ring for her birthday

So I called her to wish her happy birthday

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wayofwisdomlbw
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2019
🚨︎ report
The doorbell rings while watching TV with my daughter how is leaving for college in a couple of days

When I got back from the door she asks, β€œWho was it?”

I said, β€œIt was a pest control company but I told them we didn’t need them because mine is leaving on Monday”

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/talanb
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2019
🚨︎ report
My brother lost his favorite thumb ring and was really upset about it.

I told him, "Don't worry, we know it's thumb-wear!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/piscimancy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I lost my mood ring...

I'm not sure how I feel about that at the moment.

πŸ‘︎ 70
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/_AmazingAmanda_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do dogs always get so excited when the doorbell rings?

It’s almost never for them..

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zbylut5
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw an onion ring

So I answered it.

πŸ‘︎ 472
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ItsaMeMattio
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Someone stole my mood ring

Not sure how I feel about that

πŸ‘︎ 110
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AshtonCroft37
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My boss is making me dig through a stack of hay bare-handed to look for anything that shouldn’t be there. I suspect he dropped his wedding ring while having an affair with the new girl he hired in the pile and now he is desperate to hide the evidence from his wife who might be on to him.

But I’m just grasping at straws here.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Propagansus
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did Bilbo live on for so long even after Frodo took the One Ring away from him?

Because old hobbits die hard!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/amateur_raconteur
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a marsupial fighting ring?

Mortal wombat

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/asianprivelege
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Phone rings.......Dad: What does the Caller ID say?......Son: It says Private Caller......

Dad: Don't answer it. We only pick up for ranks Lieutenant Caller and higher.

πŸ‘︎ 224
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/2donutkid2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Marriage, it had a nice ring to it.
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/susgunner-
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Last night, I kept dreaming that I've written "The Lord of the Rings."

My wife said I've been Tolkien in my sleep.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/klitzklein
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
🚨︎ report
When Archie's fiancee put her engagement ring near her ear, she could faintly hear guitars, maracas, and soothing Spanish vocals.

It was a marry Archie band.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Danielaurence
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Who would want to take a ring to a volcano? πŸ’ ➑️ πŸŒ‹

Elijah Would

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Grundy-Buns
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the cellphone proposed his girlfriend? Ans: He gave her a ring
πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RubinKhadka
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
🚨︎ report
I belong to a Lord of the Rings Society, and we have a secret sign.

It is a Tolkien gesture.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
🚨︎ report
I lost my mood ring today.

I’m not sure how to feel about it.

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/warmLuke0
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Ring ring... ring ring...

"Incontinence hotline, please hold."

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cryptozoophagist
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I lost my Mood Ring today.

I don't know how I feel about it.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PeevesPoltergist
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
🚨︎ report
MOOD RING THIEF

Someone just stole my mood ring...

I don't know how I feel about that.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ryannbajaj
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a ring that you put on your finger

A fingering

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flickrfrog
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
🚨︎ report
So you're telling me like the verb ring has second form rang and sing has sang, the verb think also works the same way? Well, no thanks.
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/devmittal_civ16
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Plumbion Rings
πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/maxian213
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
🚨︎ report
My Son asked me if the Santa's Elves were the same Elves from Lord of the Rings

I said grow up Son, you're 32 years old.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Waspeater
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2018
🚨︎ report
Someone stole my mood ring...

I’m not so sure how I feel about that.

πŸ‘︎ 117
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/H4D3N
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2018
🚨︎ report
Ear rings (crossposted from r/technicallythetruth)
πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/usernametakenexe
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2018
🚨︎ report
What ring do girls not want?

Suffering.

πŸ‘︎ 91
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/raavenash
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2018
🚨︎ report
Every year on New Year's Eve, when everyone's counting down the final 10 seconds to ring in the new year, I get up off the couch and stand up. I stand up and raise my left leg and just leave it raised for a little while until the countdown finishes and midnight strikes

that way I always start the new year off on the right foot

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2018
🚨︎ report
My mood ring is missing

Not sure how I feel about that

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/captainkrinking
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Somebody stole my mood ring.

I just don't know how I feel about that.

πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Surabar
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06
🚨︎ report
In case you’re thinking about getting married, consider this carefullyβ€”-on the one hand, you get to wear a pretty cool ring.

On the other hand, you don’t.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27
🚨︎ report
Someone stole my mood ring...

I don’t know how to feel about that...

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xxxtemptati
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
🚨︎ report
I lost my mood ring,

and I don’t know how I feel about it.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jebnasty
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pvc
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2018
🚨︎ report
I saw an onion ring.

So I answered it.

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/forkingbread
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2019
🚨︎ report
In case you’re thinking about getting married, consider this carefullyβ€”-on the one hand, you get to wear a pretty cool ring.

On the other hand, you don’t.

πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
🚨︎ report

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