My cell phone got drunk.
It took too many screenshots.
How can you get drunk using your cell phone?
Take a lot of screen shots!
I have designed a way to combine cell phone and moving stair technologies. Want to know what it’s called?
Tellulater.
I had to pull of the road to post this cause I’ve been laughing at myself for the last 5 miles.
Your cell phone has already replaced your watch, camera, calendar and alarm clock....
Don't let it replace your family.
What do you call a small cell phone?
Why did the cell phone have to wear glasses?
Because it lost its contacts
How do you make your cell phone smarter?
Turn up the brightness.
I use my cell phone as an alarm clock.
I call it Veriz'n shine..
The real reason new cell phones break easy is because of gravity.
No phone back then was subject to multiple Gs and now we're up to 5G!
My wife and 2yo were just watching Paw Patrol. There is a cow mooing into a cell phone to video chat with the team to ask for help for a cat stuck on the roof.
I told my wife "That cat would have way more grip on roof shingles and I expect more I realism from talking cartoon cows. This is "UDDERLY" ridiculous."
She may have buried her head and avoided eye contact for a bit. I was proud.
Do they use cell phones in prison?
What was the cell phone provider's baby's first word ?
What did the first African cell phone user say to other African cell phone user?
How come cell phones don’t wear glasses?
Because they have contacts.
Why can't you choose Latin as your default cell phone language?
Because the Roman charges are too much!
They call it a CELL phone for a reason...
Why did all the passengers on the right side of the ship have dead cell phones?
They weren’t on the port side of the ship.
What do you call a fake cell phone?
Why can't you get cell phone service when you're naked?
No shirt, no shoes, no service.
New Cell Phone Store
A new cell phone store just opened in an abandoned car dealership building.
Now the sign out front reads Nokia.
If your cell phone's battery is dead, throw it into a cow pasture
This is helpful because the bull charges.
Why don’t cell phones work in a cemetery?
I wish the Master Sword could be used as a cell phone for Link.
At least there'd be a one-time only Fi...
I opened my cell phone to see the battery
And the battery was the mitophonedria
My cell phone provider announced that they were going to provide me with unlimited data, then they texted me this...
Was asked by sister to call her cell phone so she could find it. I decided it was dad joke time instead.
So my sister asked me to call her cell phone, so i of coarse said "here cell phone here come out cell phone". She then yelled at me and said "nooooooo use your cell phone to call mine", i said "yes of coarse how silly of me". I then went to get my cell phone, i then made a recording of my self calling for her cell phone, i proceeded to go back to her and play it. My sister was not amused and i laughed to hard.
Why was Spartacus' cell phone bill so high?
Because he was always Roman.
My friend simultaneously gave up coffee and finally bought a cell phone yesterday
He decided to switch to tea/mobile.
What kind of cell phone doesn't have a lock?
Two cell phones got married
The ceremony wasn't that great but the reception was excellent.
I just put my cell phone on airplane mode
Biggest disappointment of my life. It didn't fly anywhere.
Why did no one enjoy the cell phone's wedding?
The reception was terrible.
You can't use cell phones on airplanes
But you're so close to the cloud.
Me: Which is the Empire's preferred cell phone carrier?
Leia: I don't kn-
Me: AT&AT
Leia: ...
@DadJokeDarth
Dad's care about safety! Don't drive on your cell phone
How did cell phones change the world?
I have decided that I am going to invent a steam-powered cell phone.
That way, when someone asks me to send a picture, I can tell them that I can't because I have low selfie steam.
This is how my dad answers his cell phone whenever I call...
"Myrtle's Girdle Shop. Stretchy speaking!"
I saw one of those selfie cell phone holders the other day and thought that it should be called:
Be careful when reading the Bible on your cell phone.
You don't want to have to pay Roman charges. It could lead to some bad Acts.
Cell phone ring tones
So we are sitting at the dinner table and a phone makes a noise in the background.
My mom says "was that me?! And my dad responds "I dunno! I've never heard you make that noise before!"
Everytime someone else's cell phone rings near me...
Me: "Tell them I'm not here."
cell phone
chit chatting with co workers. one of them is getting a new cell phone and asked for suggestions. i told him to get a 4G cell phone because its for G's.
some of them don't understand hood speak and didn't get it, but i achieved a few groans.
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