These aren't your mom's puns, these are your sisters puns....
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 27 2019
My sister wanted to marry a postman
but our parents didn't letter.
π︎ 170
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︎ Apr 24 2021
My sister bet me that I couldnβt make a car out of spaghetti
You should have seen her face as I drove Pasta
π︎ 78
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︎ Apr 25 2021
Got my sisters whole family with my dumb owl joke, with a bonus follow up groaner
Me: I don't wanna alarm anyone, but I think someone in this room might be an owl.
Sisters kids: Who? WHO?
Me: gasp OH NO IT'S WORSE THAN I THOUGHT!
cue 2 hours of 4 small kids running around the house like nutcases screaming who at each other
Sister: You don't get to tell my kids dad jokes anymore. You're not even a dad
Me: I'm a faux pas
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Jan 05 2021
What do you call it when a sister of the church is speaking gibberish?
π︎ 5
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︎ Apr 25 2021
My sister didn't get my pun
π︎ 3k
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︎ Dec 15 2020
My sister becomes physically ill when I burn her toast.
It turns out she's black-toast-intilerant.
π︎ 5
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︎ Apr 17 2021
Whatβs the difference between in-laws & out-laws?
π︎ 7k
π
︎ Apr 28 2021
Who is Cardi-B's healthy sister?
π︎ 65
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︎ Mar 09 2021
What's it called when your mothers sister is upset?
π︎ 3
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︎ Apr 12 2021
I told my sister that my Johan Sebastian was hurting me after a long car ride.
π︎ 5
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︎ Apr 18 2021
My mom has 3 kids. My brother was born a gas, my sister a liquid and I am a solid. Yesterday my mom looked upset so I asked her what was wrong. She said "I'm pregnant"
So I said "Okay, what's the matter?"
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︎ Mar 29 2021
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?
π︎ 24
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︎ Mar 25 2021
I am nor sure my sister knows any geography...
π︎ 10
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︎ Apr 03 2021
No one will listen to White Snake with me
SO here I go again on my own
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Mar 31 2021
My sister prefers taking the stairs, but I always take the elevator.
I guess..we are raised differently.
π︎ 41
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︎ Feb 24 2021
We always thought my sisters dog Belle was an idiot, until we realized
Shes won the "No-Belle" prize
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 12 2021
Did you know Cardi B has a sister who is a personal trainer?
π︎ 53
π
︎ Feb 18 2021
After my sister got furious at me talking in Thanos dialogues, I apologized and said
π︎ 2
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︎ Apr 06 2021
Karl Marx is an historically famous figure, but nobody ever mentions his sister...
Onya Marx, who invented the starting pistol.
π︎ 530
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︎ Dec 17 2020
True story: As kids, my sister and I were fighting over the TV remote and it got heated. The remote flew across the room and a couple AAA batteries fell out. My sister threw one at me, and I grabbed a nearby salt shaker and threw it at her.
My mother, who was watching this go down, just laughs and says, "Assault and battery!"
She then left the room, cackling.
π︎ 28
π
︎ Mar 07 2021
My dad's sister works in a Paris bakery and hates it.
π︎ 4
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︎ Mar 28 2021
Sister: we'll also need to find out about how much a new roof costs.
Me: contractors do that for free.
Sister: really?
Me: yeah, it's on the house.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Mar 29 2021
True story: I was a kid, watching TV in our living room. My dad was outside using the grill. All of a sudden he bursts in the door hopping on one foot yelling βI stepped on a Bee!β
I was so concerned I jumped up and ran over to him...
Earlier that day my friend and I who were really into mountain biking had been using really sticky letters to put our names on our bikes. We were working near the general area of the BBQ.
Apparently I had dropped one...
Stuck to the bottom of my dads foot was the letter B....
A legendary dad joke from a legendary dad.
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Mar 07 2021
I just found a whip, mask and some handcuffs in my sisters room.
I just had no idea she was a superhero.
π︎ 205
π
︎ Dec 22 2020
My sister asked me to stop singing βWonderwallβ
π︎ 82
π
︎ Dec 22 2020
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin
.
Edit: thank you guys so much for the rewards! I was told this joke from my 9 year old sister, she was well chuffed to see all the votes and people thinking she was funny
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Feb 21 2021
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his toe?
π︎ 26
π
︎ Mar 02 2021
My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives
I replied, no, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law a lot better than I like mine.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Feb 13 2021
My sister told me she was constipated
I told her, she was full of crap
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jan 21 2021
Did you know Darth Vader had a sister?
π︎ 28
π
︎ Dec 30 2020
My sister just delivered a baby...
I knew she had it in her.
π︎ 190
π
︎ Nov 13 2020
What's the difference between Mordor and the Capital?
One does not simply walk into Mordor
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Jan 09 2021
What do you call a Catholic Sister who's an expert in stealth and martial arts?
π︎ 7
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︎ Feb 03 2021
π︎ 22
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︎ Nov 27 2020
My sister has been reading game of thrones and she really liked the line "the sound of steel on steel"
So she decided to steel it
π︎ 5
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︎ Dec 31 2020
My 9-month-old ate part of her sister's math homework.
Now we're waiting to see if she passes algebra.
π︎ 11
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︎ Dec 25 2020
My Dadβs sister got eaten by a lion with a long nose
π︎ 8
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︎ Jan 04 2021
Any engineers here? My trans sister is one.
π︎ 2k
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︎ May 17 2020
My sister had a baby, she hopes itβll save the relationship...
But I still donβt talk to her
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 31 2021
Son: My sister is making me INSANE.
Me: Did she push you off of a Parisian bridge?
Wife: π€¦ββοΈ
π︎ 5
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︎ Jan 14 2021
Tried telling my sister a terrorist joke
π︎ 4
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︎ Jan 03 2021
Ever wondered what to say to your sister when sheβs crying ?
βAre you having a crisis ?β
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Apr 18 2020
What did the cell say when itβs sister stepped on itβs foot
π︎ 36
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︎ Mar 15 2021
What did the cell say when their sister stepped on their toe?
π︎ 10
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︎ Feb 12 2021
I've just found some whips, mask and some handcuffs in my sisters room....
Absolutely had no idea she was a superhero !!!
π︎ 3
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︎ Feb 12 2021
Do you know Cardi B has a sister whoβs an athletic trainer ?
π︎ 131
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︎ Nov 15 2020
Did you know Cardi-B has a sister?
She's an athletic trainer
Her name is Cardi-O
π︎ 41
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︎ Dec 19 2020
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