This just in: 2 robbers just hijacked a truck delivering a supply of viagra.
Everyone be on the lookout for 2 hardened criminals.
A store clerk fought off an armed robber with a labeling gun
Now police are looking for a man with a price on his head.
A shop assistant fiercely fought off an armed robber with his labelling gun, yesterday.
Police are now looking for a man and say there's a price on his head
An armed robber bursts into a store one day.
Pointing his firearm at two cashiers, he shouts “hand over the contents of the cash register! I need it to set myself up in a trade or profession...you know, a habitual occupation followed for a livelihood and involving commercial transactions!”
Cashier 1: “What do we do?”
Cashier 2: “Do what he says, I think he means business!”
A bunch of robbers came in and stole all of my soap.
Dirty bastards.
Then the cops came over and did a full report.
They said they got away clean.
Why shouldn't you be rude to boundary robbers?
What kind of shoes do robber wear?
Robber broke into my house to find money
What’s a bank robbers favorite restaurant chain?
What did the robber say to the baker?
Have you noticed we never hear about grave robbers nowadays?
Apparently it’s a dying art.
Did you hear there was a photo store robbed recently? They caught the robber, but he says he was framed.
The robbers seem to XL at their job
The robbers took everything from my house, but I’m most upset they took my mirror
I can’t see myself without it!
What do you say when a bank robber gets sent to the same prison as his inseparable twin sons?
While driving to work, robbers jumped into my car and stole everything.
They were pirates of the car I be in.
Spanish train robber
A psycho was recently arrested for train robbery. He spoke both English and Spanish, although all we've heard is that he had some sort of loco motive.
Most of my relatives are police marksmen, except for my grandad who was a bank robber.
He died recently surrounded by his family.
So, there's some robbers going into a bank
You know the drill. AK47s, skimasks, the works. Anyway, they tell everybody to lie down on the floor. All the people in the bank hits the floor but this old man. He is still standing. So, the robbers tells him, not very politely i might add, to lie down on the floor.
Old man: "Nope. Not gonna happen. I'm CIA"
Robbers: "We don't give a shit, get on the floor NOW!"
Old man: "Nope. I'm CIA."
Old mans wife: "Walt, for Gods sake. You're not CIA, you're senile!"
When’s a robbers favorite time to go out?
A robber and a babysitter fall into a crevice.
There’s a crook and nanny in the nook and cranny
Did you hear about the ice cream robber?
He was brought into custardy.
Robber: Give me your wallet!
Dad: Sure, it’s empty anyway!
Bank Robber: Where's the Safe?!
Teller:
Bank Robber: I SAID WHERE'S THE SAFE?
Teller:
Bank Robber: ANSWER ME!
Penn: He always does this
Did you hear about the Mexican train robber??
Where is the best place to avoid a bank robbers bullets
I have a couple of friends who would not be good robbers...
They don't stick up for anyone enough to be any good at it
Have you heard about the bank teller who killed a robber with a bag of change?
She nickel and dimed him to death.
What did the French bank robber say to the bank teller handing him money?
Police report a robber breaking into homes and stealing stamps.
The perpetrator is believed to be male.
My news anchor college just couldn't stop rambling about how a bank robber escaped ...
So I told him to cut to the chase
What did the knife robber say to the spoon
What do bank robbers use to fix their disguise?
What did the carwash clerk say to the robber
Don't rob me I can give you a clean getaway
What's the difference between Batman and a robber?
Batman can go into a store without Robin.
Why was the robber crying?
Because he took things personally.
I like using the gym after bank robbers
They're the best at wiping down the equipment
Why did the robber choose not to hold up a clothing store?
He thought there would be too many causal T's.
A robber found out a way to hide money in his pants so that he could avoid the cops, Injeanous right?
A shop assistant fiercely fought off an armed robber with his labelling gun, yesterday.
Police are now looking for a man and say there's a price on his head
A shop assistant tried stopping an armed robber by attacking him with a labeling gun.
Police are now looking for a man with a price on his head.
Why did the Mexican train robber rob the train?
Because he had a loco-motive.
While driving to work, robbers jumped into my car and stole everything...
They were pirates of the car I be in!
Did you hear about the Mexican train robber
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