Taylor Swift could further increase her revenue by opening an express alterations shop

and calling it Tailor Swift

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πŸ‘€︎ u/timeexterminator
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
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We should legalize marijuana in every state and use the revenue to fix all the highways and roads

We’ll call it Operation Pot Hole

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sanjiroku
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2018
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Why did the church get indicted by the internal revenue service?

For displaying false profits.

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
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OMG Revenue Canada, take me out to dinner first! imgur.com/a/LTM21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sewmuscles
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2017
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What do you call the money your garbage business earns?

Gross revenue

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
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I received a letter the other day saying my tax return was 'outstanding'.

Although it's lovely to receive such high praise from HMRC, to be honest I can't even remember sending one in.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnnydarko-
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2018
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A dad joke for the tech age.

Hey guys, this sucks, but I went down to the bank and tried to deposit some views, but it turns out all the take is revenue.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gurneyhallack
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
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Eddy Grant has started a very profitable energy provider for homes

Have you seen his Electric Revenue?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2019
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My friend owns a mall (long)

I'm here today to tell you all a horrible story, so that none of you have to go through the same experience as my friend.

My friend, Hugh, is a very religious man, who is also involved in our community. 2 weeks ago, our local church burned down and Hugh believed it was his Christian duty to help them get back on their feet. Hugh allowed the friars of the church to set up a cart in his mall to sell their flowers. Every day, the friars came in at 7:00 in the morning with a bushel of beautiful flowers and began to work diligently to arrange them into bouquets. All was going well, the mall was generating more revenue and the church was making more money than they were by selling the flowers in front of the church on Sunday. Everyone was happy; until that first weekend.

Our town is kinda tourist-y, so we get some out-of-towners on the weekends. A gay couple came to the mall the first weekend that the friars had taken up shop (Typically, our town is pretty progressive, but the friars tended to be uber-conservative). The couple came over to the cart and admired the flowers; they tried to purchase a bouquet, but the friars refused to sell to them. The couple was outraged and went to see Hugh directly. They complained to him that the friars were being discriminatory, so Hugh promised to have a talk with the friars. When Hugh confronted the friars, they refused to sell to the couple on the grounds that β€œthey were committing an atrocity in the eyes of the lord.” The couple stormed off and promised to boycott the cart.

This past weekend, the couple came back with a large group and a letter from the mayor, saying that the friars had to sell to them, regardless of sexual preference. The friars stood firm and refused to sell to them, so the group started a protest. They brought in signs and started chanting around the cart. The friars continued to sell their flowers and Hugh allowed them to remain, so eventually the protest began to boycott the mall, rather than just the cart.

By today, the mall had lost 50% of its normal weekend revenue. The group sent a letter to Hugh saying that they could forgive him if he shut down the flower cart within the week. Hugh was pretty broken up, but he had no choice. To maintain his livelihood, he would have to kick the friars out of his store. He talked with the friars this morning and revoked their previous agreement. The friars had their cart packed and left by 7:30, to huge cheers from the community. The mall has been pretty norm

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/st_pugsley
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2016
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A friend told me this one today

Some monks set up a cart and began selling flowers for funerals in front of an Irish Catholic church. The bishop was displeased as selling funeral arrangements was a source of revenue for the church so he hired his very large friend Hugh McWIlliams to chase them away. For weeks Hugh stood guard and the monks didn't return until the bishop decided that the matter was resolved and relieved Hugh of his duty. The very next day the monks returned with their cart of flowers and it was at this point the bishop realized: only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Odhrain
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2013
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