It's an autobiography.
..NO MORE READING !!
So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."
Flattered, the man responds, "Sure... but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"
"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt. Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time. When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Iron Maiden."
The man can't believe it.
"I saw them play Cleveland in '99! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Jimmy Spitz and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the Plain Dealer Pavillion!"
Naturally, they're both shocked.
"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."
Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."
They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.
"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"
The man puts down his fruit and responds,
"It's a date!"
I know it was somewhere on this page, but I just can’t put my finger on it.
I can’t seem to put it down.
I just can’t put it down!
So today, a subreddit.
So she decided to steel it
His son asked him why the book was so fat. The father replied "It's a long story"
Strangely enough, they mostly only read the daddy issues.
It was written by Francis Near.
I can't seem to put it down.
They were sentenced to death
I can't put it down
It's impossible to put down
...in the end, you ignore it all and click "I agree".
Something bad is going to happen.
I can feel it.
What’s your problem?
It's impossible to put down!
It's non friction.
He got very angry!!! You shouldn't cover a judge by his book.
But it would be a Dead Giveaway
Not sure I’ll ever get to the Finish
The teacher said there will be a quiz on Friday.
I do hope they catch the Fake Madrid.
I woke up with back issues.
It's about time!
It seems that no matter how hard they try, they just can’t-elope
Now he's a whywolf
It was very deer-pressing...
... but unfortunately nothing that jumped out at me.
Its very hard to put down.
It was quite the Saab story.
They wanted to give the Bucharest.
It's called My Left Footloose
It's instrumental to my comprehension.
It’s a long story.
I couldn't put it down
"...the boy returned to his camp, where a rabbit was cooking..."
My son: cooking what?
It’s impossible to put it down.
It’s getting out of hand.