What language do oranges speak
π︎ 47
π
︎ May 18 2021
My clock just learned to speak!
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 15 2021
Why did Sharon ask to speak to the manager?
π︎ 27
π
︎ May 12 2021
Q. What language do stomachs speak?
π︎ 16
π
︎ Apr 11 2021
If people who speak Spanish and English are said to speak Spainglish.
Do people who speak Spanish and German speaking Sperman?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 12 2021
What language do things that fly in the sky speak....
Plane english
My 6yo laid this one on me and I hadn't heard it before so thought it might be enjoyed here
π︎ 24
π
︎ May 01 2021
Two guys are having a conversation about their friends who speak Spanish.
The first guy says, βI like to say βmuchoβ to my Spanish friends as much as I can.β
The second guy asks, βWhy would you say that?β
The first guy replies, β Because I know it means a lot to them.β
π︎ 21
π
︎ Apr 14 2021
Dad says, "I can speak every language except Greek!"
Child asks him a question in French. Dad replies, "Hmmm. That sounds Greek to me."
π︎ 11
π
︎ Apr 16 2021
One time on a road trip we drove through Iowa and stopped at a farm around harvest time. I tried to speak to the farmer about buying some fresh corn π½ but he had no time for me.
βSorry, mister,β he said. βIβm up to my ears in work.β
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 26 2021
Who do the Spice Girls speak to when they have an issue with one another?
π︎ 36
π
︎ Mar 14 2021
A soldier is called in to speak to a sergeant...
The sergeant says: "I didn't see you today in the camouflage test"
"That's the idea, Sergeant"
π︎ 12
π
︎ Apr 07 2021
I have 10 pet geese,out of which 8 speak perfect English.
The last two are Portuguese.
π︎ 32
π
︎ Feb 28 2021
Have you ever wandered why it takes the President so long to complete a sentence when he speaks?
I guess heβs just Biden his time.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Mar 19 2021
Hi, I can speak parrot!
π︎ 5
π
︎ Mar 17 2021
Which language do Mexican snakes speak?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Feb 22 2021
My dad's not allowed to speak Japanese, let alone teach the language. But there's nothing that says he can't teach Japanese cooking and geography. So far, I just learned the cooking tools and the location of the country.
This is Japan, this is ja-spatula, this is ja-whisk, this is ja-wok, this is ja-mixer, this is ja-fork, this is ja-spoon, and these are ja-chopsticks.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Jan 24 2021
What language does an unhappy toddler speak?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Mar 10 2021
Why canβt an egg speak publicly?
π︎ 301
π
︎ Dec 06 2020
The owner of the Indianpolis Colts will be in trouble if he has to speak in court, because no matter what he says the judge will think...
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 28 2021
I taught my cat to speak and ask her why does she hate vacuum cleaners.
βThey suckβ said the cat.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Feb 24 2021
I believe I speak for almost all of us here
*Good morning
*Buenos dias
*Bonjour
*Guten Morgen
*Boungiorno
*Bom dia
*God morgon
*Selamat pagi
*Goedemorgen
*God morgen
*Dobroye utro
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 26 2021
I need to speak with the chair
π︎ 50
π
︎ Dec 17 2020
A Jonathan Galindo but can speak multiple languages
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
What state in the US speaks Japanese?
π︎ 15
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
What language do garbage collectors speak?
π︎ 51
π
︎ Oct 30 2020
What paper product speaks really quickly?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
I called to speak to my doctor and the receptionist asked "May I ask who's calling?"
I replied "Yes you may, go right ahead and ask"
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 20 2021
Two people agreed to never speak to each other secretly
It was an unspoken agreement.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 25 2020
I speak in simplified fractions
Half of what I say makes sense
π︎ 17
π
︎ Oct 16 2020
π︎ 40
π
︎ Aug 22 2020
Do you speak Spanish?
A) No
B) A little
C) SeΓ±or
π︎ 365
π
︎ May 05 2020
A person who cannot see is known as blind, a person who cannot speak is known as mute. So, what do you call a person who cannot hear?
Anything you want to call them, they cannot hear.
π︎ 22
π
︎ Sep 25 2020
At what time of the year do women speak the least?
February. It has the least days.
π︎ 12
π
︎ Nov 22 2020
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
π︎ 18
π
︎ Sep 10 2020
Ah yes. I can speak mandarin too
π︎ 37
π
︎ Aug 16 2020
What do you call a car that wants to speak to the manager
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 20 2020
If you make dad jokes, what language do you speak?
Pun-Jabi
proceeds to the nearest exit
π︎ 6
π
︎ Oct 28 2020
Cosmetic surgery used to be something that people would be embarrassed to speak about
Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
π︎ 662
π
︎ Apr 30 2020
Sorry,I donβt speak Mandarin.
π︎ 27
π
︎ Aug 15 2020
My anatomy class is currently covering the skeletal system and my professor is being unreasonable with the amount of material we need to know so I made an office hour appointment to speak with him.
You can bet your ass I have a bone to pick with him.
π︎ 12
π
︎ Jul 27 2020
i speak eight different languages
7 of the languages is 10 out of 10 but my German is 9
π︎ 7
π
︎ Oct 14 2020
Why won't the bird defense attorney speak to more than one crow at a time?
Because anything more than one is murder.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Oct 11 2020
I told my kid I can speak to him on so many levels
...before we got off the elevator
π︎ 39
π
︎ Jul 27 2020
I donβt speak or understand French.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 03 2020
sorry i don't speak mandarin
π︎ 4k
π
︎ Jan 28 2019
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