What language do oranges speak

Mandarin

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πŸ‘€︎ u/handsoffmynuts08
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2021
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My clock just learned to speak!

And it tells the time!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/infernalfreeze70
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2021
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Why did Sharon ask to speak to the manager?

Because Sharon is Karen.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ballpressure
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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Q. What language do stomachs speak?

A. Hungarian 🀣🀣

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DudeManDude__
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2021
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If people who speak Spanish and English are said to speak Spainglish.

Do people who speak Spanish and German speaking Sperman?

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2021
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What language do things that fly in the sky speak....

Plane english

My 6yo laid this one on me and I hadn't heard it before so thought it might be enjoyed here

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jimmyhiggo
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
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Two guys are having a conversation about their friends who speak Spanish.

The first guy says, β€œI like to say β€˜mucho’ to my Spanish friends as much as I can.” The second guy asks, β€œWhy would you say that?” The first guy replies, β€œ Because I know it means a lot to them.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dingdongdan69
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2021
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Dad says, "I can speak every language except Greek!"

Child asks him a question in French. Dad replies, "Hmmm. That sounds Greek to me."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/roonerspize
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
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One time on a road trip we drove through Iowa and stopped at a farm around harvest time. I tried to speak to the farmer about buying some fresh corn 🌽 but he had no time for me.

β€œSorry, mister,” he said. β€œI’m up to my ears in work.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fladavpam
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
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Who do the Spice Girls speak to when they have an issue with one another?

Cumin Resources

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πŸ‘€︎ u/T33NW01F
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
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A soldier is called in to speak to a sergeant...

The sergeant says: "I didn't see you today in the camouflage test"

"That's the idea, Sergeant"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/A_Fishy_Boi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
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I have 10 pet geese,out of which 8 speak perfect English.

The last two are Portuguese.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rhshi14
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2021
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Have you ever wandered why it takes the President so long to complete a sentence when he speaks?

I guess he’s just Biden his time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Play2Win1776
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
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Hi, I can speak parrot!

Hi, I can speak parrot!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/battlerobot
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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Which language do Mexican snakes speak?

Hisssss-panic

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deadly_R
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
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My dad's not allowed to speak Japanese, let alone teach the language. But there's nothing that says he can't teach Japanese cooking and geography. So far, I just learned the cooking tools and the location of the country.

This is Japan, this is ja-spatula, this is ja-whisk, this is ja-wok, this is ja-mixer, this is ja-fork, this is ja-spoon, and these are ja-chopsticks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FoxyCamoCat738
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
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What language does an unhappy toddler speak?

Whine-ese.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GovernorZipper
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2021
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Why can’t an egg speak publicly?

He cracks under pressure

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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The owner of the Indianpolis Colts will be in trouble if he has to speak in court, because no matter what he says the judge will think...

That's Irsay.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dawsonju
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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I taught my cat to speak and ask her why does she hate vacuum cleaners.

β€œThey suck” said the cat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/redpandarox
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2021
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I believe I speak for almost all of us here

*Good morning *Buenos dias *Bonjour *Guten Morgen *Boungiorno *Bom dia *God morgon *Selamat pagi *Goedemorgen *God morgen *Dobroye utro

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
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I need to speak with the chair
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ha-Ka-Tu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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A Jonathan Galindo but can speak multiple languages

Jonathan Duolingo

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EricTung1007
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
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What state in the US speaks Japanese?

Ohio

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πŸ‘€︎ u/redzzdelady
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
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What language do garbage collectors speak?

Trash Talk.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
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What paper product speaks really quickly?

Wrapping paper.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
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I called to speak to my doctor and the receptionist asked "May I ask who's calling?"

I replied "Yes you may, go right ahead and ask"

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
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Two people agreed to never speak to each other secretly

It was an unspoken agreement.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CanUHekkinStahp
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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I speak in simplified fractions

Half of what I say makes sense

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DongLongus
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
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LeBron speaks Spanish v.redd.it/74hjmaf7ygi51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BobbyBBabby
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
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Do you speak Spanish?

A) No

B) A little

C) SeΓ±or

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tommadds
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
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A person who cannot see is known as blind, a person who cannot speak is known as mute. So, what do you call a person who cannot hear?

Anything you want to call them, they cannot hear.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
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At what time of the year do women speak the least?

February. It has the least days.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dvtien95
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
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Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StoppingMusic21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
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Ah yes. I can speak mandarin too
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ggfchl
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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What do you call a car that wants to speak to the manager

A McKaren

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KetchupTheTomato
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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If you make dad jokes, what language do you speak?

Pun-Jabi

proceeds to the nearest exit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/itsthatbrownguy91
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
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Cosmetic surgery used to be something that people would be embarrassed to speak about

Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/afranc72
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
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Sorry,I don’t speak Mandarin.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Autism--_--
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
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My anatomy class is currently covering the skeletal system and my professor is being unreasonable with the amount of material we need to know so I made an office hour appointment to speak with him.

You can bet your ass I have a bone to pick with him.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
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i speak eight different languages

7 of the languages is 10 out of 10 but my German is 9

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Slymood
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
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Why won't the bird defense attorney speak to more than one crow at a time?

Because anything more than one is murder.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TeslaFan900
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
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I told my kid I can speak to him on so many levels

...before we got off the elevator

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UndeadNineKills
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
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I don’t speak or understand French.

Such is life.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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sorry i don't speak mandarin
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Coderedcody
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2019
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