They say she had a mean flow.
I really want to have a daughter and name her Zelda.
I imagine, as she gets older she will spend all her time writing sick poetry and rhymes in her journal, growing her hair down to her back, not to spite me, but so she can donate it later, and expand her wit by studying improv comedy through highschool.
As she becomes famous, I hope she will invite me to one of her rap battles and put me in the front row. My heart will grow as she takes the stage, but fatherly intuition tells me something is wrong...Zelda is frozen at the microphone.
I see her up on the stage, eyes alight with fright, hair pulled tight into a bun. She and I lock eyes, a moment of silence passes and serenity slowly enters...THIS is the moment we have been waiting for all our lives.
Looking up calmly, I couldn't be more proud as I exclaim, "Rap puns, Zel. Rap puns, Zel! Let down your hair!"
Call myself the bar inspector
It’s called Rigatone.
Let me break it down lion by lion
I told him it was crap.
turns out she was just a biter.
They really wanted to be Gs
Diss Trackula
Skittish Yiddish!
Lay-Z
Rap music
A few years ago, we started a show that I quite frankly never thought would work.
Nearly four years later, including two sold out appearances at San Francisco Sketchfest and a local TV featurette, our show "Capitol PUNishment" is now streaming on Twitch Friday night at 8:30pm PST.
I hope it's ok to post this in here. If not, feel free to remove with no hard feelings. Just encouraging pun lovers to check out what is best described as "a fast-paced, in-the-moment spectacle that combines everything you love about gameshows, rap-battles, and "dad" jokes, into a unique and hilarious competitive format."
Our channel is twitch.tv/capitolpuns
Here's a little video to help paint the picture: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2RE9PgmfXo
Something bad is going to happen.
I can feel it.
Oh well, no biggie.
They were called 2Pac
Well, it is more of a rap really.
I'm calling it Cling Rap.
Waka Flocka Seagulls.
A disc track
A diss appointment.
He probably just needs a tissue
The Wuhan Clan
What do you call Al Gore beat-boxing/rapping? An Al-Gore-Rythm 😁
He calls himself Ridiclewis.
He's going to get the eclectic chair.
mc²
Inflation.
... to be hip-hop-critical
So my dad just now made the dad joke of Christmas.
Mom: Hurry up and start rapping!
Dad: ( beep box/fake Rapping) okay there I'm starting!
Bubble rap
Because they have a mad flow.
It’s Ryan Reynold’s Rap.
a Frap
Otherwise they'd be called bachelor jokes.
Some people call it crap.
"You scared the bajeezus out of me!"
Dissingfectant
Crap.
