Never blame anyone else for the road you're on...
...that's your own asphalt!
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︎ Feb 10 2021
You can't blame anyone if you fall in your driveway due to snowy weather...
Because that's your own asphalt.
π︎ 15
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︎ Feb 15 2021
Phil is to blame for this one, nothing to do with me.
π︎ 3k
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︎ Sep 06 2020
Donβt blame others for the road that youβre on
Thatβs your own asphalt
π︎ 30
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︎ Dec 30 2020
The Ford Motor Company suspects r/wallstreetbets is to blame...
...for the order of 1,000 Caramel Mach-E autos.
So they are putting the order on hold.
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︎ Feb 05 2021
Who do teachers blame when dealing with bad apples?
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︎ Feb 02 2021
My Cousin Blames Me For Him Tripping On His Own Driveway.
I donβt understand, itβs his own stupid asphalt.
π︎ 4
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︎ Dec 11 2020
Why does Eve get the blame for eating the apple?
After all, it was Adam's apple!
π︎ 9
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︎ Jul 08 2020
My dad didnβt love me as a child, but I donβt really blame him.
I wasnβt born until he was an adult.
π︎ 77
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︎ May 08 2020
I was shocked to see the Memorial Day pool party videos from the south, but I can't really say I blame them...
Because Missouri loves company.
π︎ 8
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︎ May 26 2020
A bad workman blames his fools...
EDIT: tools
...stupid keyboard...
π︎ 667
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︎ Jul 16 2019
Thereβs only one thing to blame for the cause of earthquakes.
Itβs always the Earthβs fault.
π︎ 31
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︎ Jul 06 2019
When the librarian bumped her head, she had no one to blame but her shelf
π︎ 52
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︎ Sep 11 2019
When a construction worker farts dont blame him it's his asphalt
π︎ 12
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︎ Oct 14 2019
If you lose a scapegoat you have no one to blame but yourself.
π︎ 13
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︎ Dec 18 2018
You only have your shelf to blame.
π︎ 11
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︎ Feb 05 2019
George Washington is the only president to not blame the previous administration for his problems
π︎ 17
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︎ Nov 06 2018
Do you know why the computer programmer is to blame for Global Warming?
He didn't follow the Al Gore rhythm
π︎ 7
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︎ Mar 13 2016
My wife blames me for getting verbally abused when she went to an animal rights rally in bobington.
She must have thought I said 'wear the fox hat'
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︎ Nov 22 2017
I partially blame the saturation of TMNT marketing all over my life at the moment....
So, I work as a content writer/developer/coder/whatevs for an educational publisher, specializing in science. This week, I put in a request to one of our artists for an illustration of a centrifuged blood tube. He did one up and sent it back right away, asking if what he did was alright.
My emailed response?
"These lookβ¦
(β’_β’)
( β’_β’)>ββ -β
(ββ _β )
β¦tubular.
YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--"
π︎ 4
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︎ Jul 30 2014
Don't blame it on me
My daughter had just vacated a chair, and my wife was trying to move it with her foot. She turns to me and asks, "Is your leg on the chair?" I said, "No." She asks, "Why can't I move it?" I jokingly replied, "Because you're weak?" And then, inspiration hit: "Don't blame it on me, blame it on mu." She just shook her head while I laughed.
π︎ 2
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︎ Jun 21 2015
I blame single mothers for society's lack of appreciation for dadjokes
It's a shame that so many people grow up without fathers to show them how its done.
π︎ 2
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︎ Jul 18 2015
Donβt blame others for the road youβre on...
Thatβs your own asphalt
π︎ 27
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︎ Jan 04 2021
Don't blame others for the road you're on.
π︎ 124
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︎ Nov 29 2020
if you crash your car in your driveway who do you blame?
You can't blame anyone else that's your own asphalt!
π︎ 9
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︎ Jan 21 2021
Donβt blame others for the road youβre on.
Thatβs your own asphalt.
π︎ 40
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︎ Dec 11 2020
Don't blame others for the road you're on.
π︎ 78
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︎ Dec 18 2020
You canβt blame anyone for the road youβre on.
π︎ 9
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︎ Dec 15 2020
Never blame someone else for the road you are on
π︎ 4
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︎ Jan 03 2021
Don't blame others for the road you're on.
π︎ 13
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︎ Dec 11 2020
Don't blame others for the road you're on in life.
π︎ 40
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︎ Nov 22 2020
Dont blame other for the road you're on.
π︎ 3
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︎ Nov 26 2020
My dad didnβt love me as a child, but I donβt really blame him.
I wasnβt born until he was an adult.
π︎ 8k
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︎ Jun 11 2018
I blame Mother Earth for all earthquakes.
π︎ 14
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︎ Mar 11 2019
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