Seems like good parenting to me

My son is taking part in a social experiment. He has to wear a "GO VEGAN" t-shirt for 2 weeks and see how people react. So far he's been spit on, punched and had a bottle thrown at him! I'm curious to see what happens once he goes outside.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shrillershark24
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2021
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With a dog, you have a glimpse into parenting.

With a cat, you have a glimpse into marriage.

πŸ‘︎ 93
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
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Recent studies have shown that roughly 80% of goth girls in our country's high schools enjoy reading parenting magazines.

Strangely enough, they mostly only read the daddy issues.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/M1ST3RT0RGU3
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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First one in the womb, wife reading parenting book.

Wife: "you should probably read this when I am done so we can be on the same page."

Me: "how will we be on the same page if you've already finished the book?"

I think I already have this dad stuff down.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zrockstar
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2016
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Parenting is like playing chess.

I don't know how to play chess.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Megaseth
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
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Good Parenting

So, it's service week at my school and I decided to serve locally at a nearby elementary school. I was assigned to a 3rd grade class. On the second day, the whole class was setting up Google Classroom, and after completing it, one of the little buggers looked at me said with a huge smile

"I'm done!"

Being a man of culture, I naturally responded with

"Hi Done! I'm [Dakkadence]."

The little girl looked at me, groaned, and facepalmed. She whined

"That's my dad's joke!"

With kids getting such an upbringing, I'm slowly regaining my faith for the next generation.

Edit: A word.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dakkadence
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2018
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I told my parents I was bisexual

My dad asked, "so you like both men and women?"

I responded with, "yeah, but I'm not seeing anyone right now"

He said, "so you must be on stand-bi"

πŸ‘︎ 12k
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2021
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My parents always tell me their world doesn’t revolve around me...

so I guess that means I’m not actually their sun.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2021
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Our kids tee ball team, the Tigers, won the championship. All the parents were very proud and put in for a little statuette of the front of a tiger to give them to celebrate. When it came in, for some reason it was the back half of a tiger.

Needless to say, it was a cat ass trophy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AFonziScheme
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2021
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My parents found this while camping... someone has a good sense of humour
πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sloandog69
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2021
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I had a friend in high school that really wanted to become a pilot. His parents hated the idea. Every time he brought it up, they were like

"You're grounded!"

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Derpasm
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2021
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Parents of reddit: you can't just waltz into your kid's room whenever you want!

At least make sure the song they're listening to is in triple time first.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2021
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My 15 month old daughter has been saying "momma" and "dadda" a lot now, and I tried using this to my advantage...

Secretly (when my wife was out), I'd ask her "who do you love more?", and praise her when she said "dadda!". This has been going on for weeks now.

The other day, my wife got home and I wanted to show her my little 'trick'. So I asked our daughter, "Who do you love more?", in which case she replied "dadda!" and ran towards my wife (which is very clearly her favourite btw).

My wife, who didn't care much for the new thing I taught our daughter, bent down and picked her up to cuddle with her. Her facial expression changed a bit, then she laughed. She looked at me and said "well, she ran to me as she said that, and her diaper is full... so clearly she was full of crap when she said that!"

My wife is now in on the dad jokes and won this one!

Edit: Bolded the text to emphasize what part of this story was the dad joke...

Final Edit: My wife was surprised at how much this blew up! She says thanks to everyone, but she has no idea what the awards are for (since she doesn’t use Reddit). πŸ˜‚

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2021
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My parents always pushed me to get a big job. So i worked at a soda company just to sprite them.
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GREGY-K
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
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Once I became a parent, I finally understood the . . .

scene where Yoda gets so tired of answering Luke's questions that he just dies.

πŸ‘︎ 168
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
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MY PARENTS RAISED ME AS AN ONLY CHILD

THIS REALLY ANNOYED MY YOUNGER SISTER.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/globevoyager_in
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2021
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So I told my parents I’m gray…

Dad said he didn’t like my tone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EpicWinterWolf
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
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If my son ever came out to be trans then I wouldn’t have a son anymore

I would have a daughter

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Captbeauner
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
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Two letters wanted to get married, but their parents wouldn't let them...

So they enveloped.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thebenmix11
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
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My wife got really mad when I told her she had no sense of direction

She packed up her bags and right.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
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How do parents lose their kids in the mall?

Seriously, any tips are welcome

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πŸ‘€︎ u/YT_JRGRAND
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
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My parents always said money couldn't by happiness...

Then I got Antidepressants

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JohnDayzRP
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2021
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I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet?

I asked my 18 brothers and sisters and they don't know either.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chihiro_yoru
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
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Do you remember when you were a kid and whenever you cried, your parents would say, β€œI’ll give you a reason to cry!?" I always thought they were going to hit me...

...not that they were going to destroy the housing market 20 years later.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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My parents told me today that my grandmother was Indian

Nani?

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ArKXamZ
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2021
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I've got a condition which causes me to make terrible puns.

It's a dad-ly disease.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/theswarthyknight
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2021
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A Parent Joke
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aparentjoke
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2021
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Being a parent is hard - my son won't ever let me have a good night's sleep; so when my wife came home the other day and asked why I was so red...

I told her I was just completely sunburnt

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OK_lp
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
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I have a friend who loves computer programming but his parent wanted him to be a doctor. So he became a plastic surgeon.

Now he's a full rack developer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nech1492
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2021
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When I was a kid, I accidentally caught my parents having SEX

These were the most awkward 40 minutes of my life

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sterovebertz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2021
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My parents were upset when I told them I wouldn't be taking over the family bakery.

That's just not how I roll.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JinTaisa
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2021
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When I was 15 my parents told me I was adopted.

And that I'd be meeting my new parents that afternoon.

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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When I was a kid, my parents would always say, β€œExcuse my French” after a swear word...

I’ll never forget that first day at school when the teacher asked did we know any French...

πŸ‘︎ 93
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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Why were your parents so honest with you growing up?

Beacuse they were trans-parents

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FeastorFugu
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
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Tony the tiger ate both of my grandmother's parents.

Tearfully, I asked him why. He just looked at me and said, "They're GREAT!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lord_Grif
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
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Those parents must be nuts
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πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
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I caught my son chewing electrical chords, so I had to ground him.

He's doing better currently and conducting himself properly.

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
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So I brought my girlfriend home to meet my parents. She looks like my mum, sounds like my mum, even dresses like my mum..

My dad doesn't like her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OliPark
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2021
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How much did it cost HYDRA to kill Tony Stark’s parents?

One Buck.

πŸ‘︎ 14k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
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Growing up, there was a time my parents couldn't pay the electric bill.

It was the darkest day of my life.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/elster000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2021
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Both of my parents don't identify with the gender they were assigned at birth. They are both very honest and open people.

I guess you could say they're transparent.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/leah_onomatopoeia
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2021
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An Italian man loses his hands from bike accident. What did his parents ask the doctor?

β€œWill my son able to speak again?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Elver-Galarga7
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2021
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Intendo
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hey_koolguy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
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Child walks past the parents bedroom, peaks inside and mumbles....

"And you want to send me to a psychologist for sucking my thumb."

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
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Do unfit parents have to exercise a lot to get their children back?
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MyLatestInvention
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2021
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I've always had a difficult relationship with my parents.

When I was first born, I didn't speak to them for 2 years.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
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I ate a kid's meal at McDonald's today

Their parents weren't happy.

πŸ‘︎ 227
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ehhzuulaaa
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2021
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When my parents would go to the bar, my dad would always carry his drink to the table in his left hand and my mother’s in the other. I finally asked him why...

And he said, β€œBecause your mother is always right.”

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Uncle_Bug_Music
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
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When I was 15, my parents told me that I was adopted....

......And I'd be meeting my new parents that afternoon.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
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